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"It's always something": African-American women's college reentry experience

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"It's always something": African-American women's college reentry experience

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“IT’S ALWAYS SOMETHING”:
AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN’S COLLEGE REENTRY EXPERIENCE
by
Sandra Harte Bunce
A Dissertation Presented to the
FACULTY OF THE GRADUATE SCHOOL
UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA
In Partial Fulfillment of the
Requirements for the Degree
DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY
(Sociology)
December, 1996
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UMI Number: 9720196
Copyright 1996 by
Bunce, Sandra Harte
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UNIVERSITY OF SOUTHERN CALIFORNIA
THE GRADUATE SCHOOL
UNIVERSITY PARK
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA 90007
This dissertation, written by
Sandra Louise Harte Bunce
under the direction of hfiE. Dissertation
Committee, and approved by all its members,
has been presented to and accepted by The
Graduate School, in partial fulfillment of re
quirements for the degree of
DOCTOR OF PHILOSOPHY
v Dean of Crndtnrte Studies
Date Npvember 20, 199.6
DISSERTATION COMMITTEE
............
I Chau
CjljJLiAM,......
Chairperson
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£bl\j>r>ca. Pr^-f. A'W/vJ
“r r s ALWAYS SOMETHING”:
AFRICAN-AMERICAN WOMEN’S COLLEGE REENTRY EXPERIENCE
This qualitative study explored the experience of a group of middle-class African-
American women as they reentered college after a period of time in the workplace and/or
raising a family. The converging forces of race, class, and gender, contextualized and
impacted the students’ experiences in their families and in their education.
The reentry experience from the perspective of middle-class African-American
women demonstrated parallels and contrasts between white reentry women of the same
social class. That is, similarities within classes and between races emerged around the
themes of role strain, family ideology, and family structure, suggesting that social class,
race and gender intersect with one another to provide experiences that resonate among
reentry women of both races.
These reentry women held education in high esteem and had long anticipated
completing college. They persistently met the recurring challenges of negotiating financial
obligations, commitments, and personal goals through program selection, and adjusting
class schedules to suit their family’s needs. Because they placed high value on
motherhood and family life, their personal educational goals were accomplished through
much self-sacrifice. Individual coping mechanisms were devised to meet their particular
needs in order to minimize the inconvenience experienced by family members.
It was found that the experience of the middle-class African-American woman was
unique in a number of ways as compared to white middle-class women, as well as different
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from poor African-American women. Socioeconomic class, therefore, though not the sole
determinant, may well provide the most salient explanation of attitudes, lifestyles and life
chances for these women with regard to their reentry experience. At the same time,
multifaceted interactions were found to exist between race, class and gender, with
differences within race and between social class indicating that as income levels rose, race
became a less salient issue; and, as income levels decreased, race took on a greater role.
As society moves in the direction of dual-earner families, African-American
women may be characterized as role models for women of all ethnicities as their strategies
for achievement, as well as their coping mechanisms are observed and analyzed.
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
CHAPTER 1: Introduction......................................................................................1
The Research Question................................................................................. 1
Review of Literature..................................................................................... 3
CHAPTER 2: Methods..........................................................................................30
The Sample.................................................................................................30
Collection of D ata...................................................................................... 34
Analysis of Data......................................................................................... 48
CHAPTER 3: Going Back: The Decision to Return to School...........................50
“We were taught to be achievers” .............................................................. 51
“I always pictured myself as a college graduate” ....................................... 58
“I made the decision myself’...................................................................... 64
“I had heard about student loans” .............................................................. 70
CHAPTER 4: Juggling: Negotiating School and Family Life..............................82
“Generally I study when everybody’s asleep” .............................................83
“Get the laundry folded and keep the kitchen clean”.................................. 89
“I keep telling myself that what I’m doing is more important
than cooking breakfast” ...................................................................... 96
“Sometimes he gives me mixed messages” ...............................................100
“Mom, go and do your school work, we’ll see about dinner” ..................114
“I look at things differently now” ............................................................. 122
“It is still very much a white system”......................................... 125
CHAPTER 5: Discussion and Conclusions........................................................ 129
Implicatons for further research............................................................... 162
APPENDIX......................................................................................................... 165
BIBLIOGRAPHY................................................................................................ 170
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Chapter One
INTRODUCTION
The Research Question
Adult life cycle studies have come to be understood in developmental, sequential
stages (Duvall, 1957; Hill, 1964, 1970) which reflect a pattern of transitions throughout
life with the completion of education as one of the early stages. However, because of
family obligations, marriage, economics, children, and employment, among women there
a great deal of life course variability which may prohibit early college attendance.
In recent years, increasing numbers of women are returning to school after years
of delay to complete or begin a college education. In fact, women are making up the
majority of nontraditional students enrolled in college (Levin & Levin, 1991).
While there is a rich literature on the reentry process for white middle-class
women, there is little available to shed light on the experience of middle-class African
American women as they return to college. Indeed, according to Doris Wilkenson,
“where Black families have been examined by social scientists, they have been evaluated
primarily from the frame of reference of social problem analysis” (Wilkenson, 1969).
Further, in some paradigms of the study of black families, “cultural differences usually
associated with ‘black culture’ are deemed to be in reality aspects o f‘lower-class culture,
in which blacks are overrepresented” (Solomon & Mendes, 1978, p. 273). The purpose
of this study is to qualitatively explore the reentry experience for a selected group of
African-American women, filling a current gap in research literature.
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The study of middle-class African-American reentry women provides not only an
opportunity to examine the dynamics that occur when women challenge the traditional
perceptions of feminine attitudes and behaviors associated with their respective social
classes, it provides an added dimension o f race. While middle-class African-Americans
have more resources (financially and socially) to successfully interface with the established
system individually, they may still face discrimination on both personal or structural levels.
Their challenges and responses to those challenges may therefore be different than
African-American or white poor.
Symbolic interactionism (Cooley, 1902) assumes that as individuals reflect others’
attitudes and behaviors, an identity of self develops. Individual identity is constructed,
not in a vacuum but in an interactive arena bounded by norms and values reflective of
one’s place in society. In short, the point of convergence of gender, race and social class
is that arena.
While this current research is exploratory and is framed by the need, as stated by
Okhamafe (1989), to study different kinds of women in their own different terms” (p.33),
it is therefore not intended merely to be a comparative process. Studying middle-class
reentry women offers an opportunity to examine the ethnic parallels as well as the
differences of women of the same social class, thus being able to tease out some of the
more subtle interactions of social, economic and psychological processes, for gender is
experienced differently in the context of other inequalities.
Wilson (1980), suggests that as more and more African-American families move
into the middle-class, their attitudes and lifestyles reflect this status, identifying access to
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resources that reinforce middle-class norms. Further, Willie (1970) suggests that different
family forms reflect varieties of economic levels across society and to stereotype a family
style by ethncity or culture is unproductive at best. While acknowledging the infinite
scenarios that contribute to individual life styles, if social class is examined as an umbrella
variable that may mold family ideologies and family structures (Reissman, 1959), the
question must be raised, “Are middle-class African-American women more similar to
middle-class white women than they are to poor African-American women? In the
experience of reentry women, what appears as the most salient factor, race or social class?
This large question will be examined within the framework of three related themes from
the literature: Role strain, family ideology and family structure.
Review of the Literature: The Reentry Experience
Currently, over half the university degrees granted in the United States are granted
to women (Bronzaft, 1991), many of who are beyond the traditional age for college
enrollment. Davis and Bumpass (1976) estimated that more than one-third of married
women have returned or anticipate returning to college.
Whenever family members assume new tasks or establish new or different
priorities, some amount of voluntary or involuntary adjustments must occur. With spousal
adjustments in mind, Ballmer & Cozby (1981) ask, “Can a marriage survive when the wife
discovers her brain?” Their studies (Ballmer & Cozby, 1974) indicate some of the
negative aspects of returning to college from a husband’s point of view. He might be
feeling that his wife no longer spends enough time with him, his sex life may deteriorate,
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or his wife may be less dependent emotionally and/or financially on him, i.e., the existing
power structure may be altered. All of these feelings may occur in spite of the fact that he
might admire his wife more as an individual because of her return to school.
Hochschild (1989) raises questions about intrapersonal conflicts both husbands and
wives experience about what they feel and what they believe they should feel with regard
to their own and their partner’s niche in the family. This may be due to the possibility that
a wife and mother returning to college presents a direct challenge to traditionally imposed
expectations of such women and will of necessity require rethinking if not readjustments
to the family’s established patterns (Huston-Hoburg & Strange, 1986).
Thus, the question of available family support becomes a paramount factor in the
decision to return to school. Hooper (1979) acknowledges that a woman’s hesitancy to
disrupt the family routines is important in measuring the costs and benefits of reentry.
Studying this dilemma, Carol Mohney and Wayne Anderson (1988) conducted interviews
with thirty-eight returning students (whose ethnicity is not identified), to learn what the
respondents perceived as motivators or barriers to returning to college. They found that
the strongest variables for the reentry decision were (in no order of significance):
a) Sense of inner strength, ability to survive
b) Good feeling about self— I deserve this
c) Need to be independent: Need to take care of self and children, not
to be trapped in traditional roles
d) Family of origin valued education, work ethic
e) Strong belief that this is time for self-development
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f) Now is the time to complete a dream or degree
g) Can’t advance in job without education
h) Need credentials for goals (master’s, etc.)
The barriers to prior enrollment were:
a) Parenting demands
b) Early pregnancy
c) Lack of money for education
The factors which enabled them to enroll in college:
a) Children “old enough,” empty nest
b) Adequate child care
c) Breathing space for self now
d) Support from friends, peers, parents, boss
e) Support from partner
f) Work offers support (time, money, flexible scheduling)
g) Finances “good enough”
This list of variables suggests that family obligations and degree of anticipated
familial support are significant factors in the decision to return to school. The question of
spousal support is one that is lacking concrete definition throughout the literature and has
been termed an “umbrella” variable by Rice (1982). She states that support may be
viewed as attitudinal, lack of opposition, or permission granted to take on additional
activities and responsibilities. Other types of support may include financial assistance, a
shift in home and child care responsibilities, or acceptance of limitations of spousal and/or
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parenting interactions. Support may include all of the above or any combination of them
since the definition will vary from couple to couple. The gender ideology of society as
well as that of the couple, as described by Hochschild (1989), will contribute to the
returning woman’s sense of entitlement, adequate levels of support, and her reciprocal
responsibilities.
Personal identity perceptions may become cloudy when old stereotypical
conceptions of femininity are threatened by intellectual achievement. Along with
traditional views of appropriate female behavior, the family structure itself may be
threatening to her choice to return to college. Each woman must therefore determine her
own strategies to combine personal goals, personal identity, and societal and family
expectations in the pursuit of her educational goals.
Children and the impact of reentry on their lives remains a major consideration for
the returning student. Judith Oakey Hooper (1979) found that children reported positive
feelings, such as greater independence, greater interest in school themselves, and an
increase sense of responsibility. In fact, overall respect for their mothers had increased.
Most of the children in Hooper’s study indicated they had increased housework, but did
not express any resentment about their mothers’ new commitments.
Although the children reportedly found it difficult to think o f may ways “things had
changed” around home, mothers nevertheless reported considerable guilt about the
possible negative effects their return to college may have on their families. To
compensate, they may take classes at a “convenient time” and study late at night to reduce
the impact on family life.
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Hooper found that the families she studied fell into three types: 1) The agreement
group where the woman’s role as a student was performed in addition to her family roles;
2) The egalitarian group where the mother’s new role of student was seen as important to
her and deserved as much support as any other family member, and, 3) The disagreement
group where the student role was used as a lever to force change in the family roles and
family structure. Although guilt was experienced in all three groups, the third type
differed because the women in this group felt guilt around the attempt to force change in
the family rather than around their new student role.
Guilt has been the focus of several studies surrounding reentry women (Parelman,
1974; LeFevre, 1970; Markus, 1972; and VanMeter, 1976, all as cited in Hooper, 1979)
because it seems to be interwoven into so many aspects of the process. Even the school
experience that is rewarding and enjoyable in itself also produces feelings of guilt when
time is taken away from home and family (Ballmer & Cozby, 1981).
There have been differences in family expectations and levels of guilt depending
upon the goals of reentry. There appears to be less contention in situations where the
woman is involved in a continuing education program rather than the pursuit of a degree
(Astin, 1976; Ballmer & Cozby, 1981). The amount of commitment seems to be more
intense for those pursuing an academic degree (Bardwick, 1971) which may be reflected
as husbands feeling threatened and wives feeling guilty as she weighs the value of personal
goals and self-fulfillment against family obligations (Homed, 1972). “Returnees may feel
selfish for neglecting the full responsibility of home, children and husband, and for
spending money for their own pleasure and self-fulfillment” (Astin, 1976). Levels of guilt
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may also be connected to self-esteem and a sense of locus of control (Katz, 1976; Hooper
& Rice, 1978), as women attempt to set priorities for themselves in the context of then-
existing commitments and responsibilities.
Role Theory and the Concept of Role Strain
Role strain (Goode, 1960) has been used in the past to explain the issues involving
guilt, self-esteem and locus of control experienced by reentry women. While the term
“role” and the concept of “role strain” may have become a limiting notion, it remains
commonly used in the literature, and thus role theory and the concept of role strain will be
briefly examined.
Goode states that “role relationships are role sets,” and that one position may
result in several role relationships with a variety of people. “The individual is thus likely to
face a wide, distracting, and sometimes conflicting array of role obligations” (p. 485).
When she cannot meet all those obligations, role strain occurs. There are four types of
role strain: 1) Strain from the inhibition of personal freedom; 2) Strain from conflicting
demands of one’s time, space and resources; 3) Strain from inconsistent norms; and, 4)
Strain from complex and competing role sets.
Goode suggests that an individual must decide what is an appropriate “role price,”
which is determined by the following interaction of three supply and demand factors:
1) An individual’s pre-existing or autonomous norm
commitment— his/her desire to carry out the performance;
2) His/her judgment as to how much his/her role partner
will punish or reward him/her for his performance; 3) The
esteem or dis-esteem with which the peripheral social
networks or important reference groups will respond to
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both ego’s performance and to alter’s attempts to make
ego perform adequately (p.489).
In addition to this negotiation is the understanding that mutual feelings of power, esteem,
and resources will affect the ability of either partner to demand, punish or reward.
Women appear to experience more role strain when they take on additional roles
than men experience under the same conditions (Gove, 1972). Further, women suffer
more than men from the existing patterns of gender interactions. The experience of
reentry requires women to engage in an environment of role conflict because of the
competing types of roles available to her as a college woman. Feminine attributes and
intellectual achievement, have in the past, been seen as mutually exclusive. When the
additional layers of race and social class are added, the dynamic of role strain can become
a complex matrix of demands and contradictions for the reentry woman.
Because the normative roles for women across ethnicities have been associated
with family life, the family becomes, as Goode says, “a key position in solutions of role
strain. Most individuals must account to their families for what they spend in time, energy
and money outside the family.”
While role theory seems to have been utilized to examine the reentry experience
(Lewis, 1988; VanMeter& Agronow, 1982; Katz & Piotrkowski, 1983; Gerson, 1985),
many feminist theorists, among others, have criticized role theory as an inadequate means
of exploration of either gender relations or social change (Osmond & Thome, 1991).
According to feminist scholars, role theory wrongly assumes complementary “male roles”
and ‘Yemale roles,” which in reality have never been addressed as equal. It has been the
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“female role” which has been seen as adaptive. The concept of roles connotes conformity
to roles as positive and deviance from roles as negative behaviors. Thus role theory
cannot adequately address the dynamics of social change. Ultimately, Osmond & Thome
(1991) state, “the fundamental weakness of sex-role theory is that it cannot account for
power, inequality, and conflict in gender relations.”
The concept of “role” is in itself a limiting notion since by attributing particular
behaviors to specific statuses (e.g., mother, wife, daughter, student, nurse, minority group
member, etc.), the entire scope of an individual’s obligations and relationships become
generalized and thus may not be observed. For example, the definitive role of mother has
changed over time to include a much wider and varied field of tasks and obligations.
Expectations for mothers of today are much more inclusive of nontraditional
responsibilities than the narrower definition of thirty to forty years ago. In addition to the
constraints that time puts on the usefulness of the concept of “role,” there are also cultural
restraints. Historically, motherhood for African-American women has required adaptive
responses to the needs of their families as they have lived in a structurally unequal society.
For example, African-American mothers have because of necessity been employed outside
the home. Thus, their experiences as wives and mothers cannot be generalized by using the
concept of role as based solely on the white model. Feminist theorists have offered
differing opinions about the relationship between white and black women, their respective
cultures and the application of a universal model to the examination of their life
experiences, which will be addressed at a later point in this chapter. Therefore, for the
purposes of this particular research endeavor, while role theory may contribute to a
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conceptual pool, it cannot solely provide an adequate basis to explore the experiences of
black reentry women and their families.
Using grounded theory, and Charmaz* (1983) suggestions for an ongoing coding
system, the research will aim to identify underlying patterns that will themselves suggest a
schema that will fit the unique nature of the data. Some researchers have successfully
used such alternative approaches for studying the reentry process. Rice (1982)
exemplifies this by looking at patterns of family adjustment. In her research, she observed
that there was a significant relationship between a woman's commitment to stay in school
and the type of family in which she functioned. Some families cope with change by
adjusting behaviors and adapting, others remain rigid and play out old attitudes.
Commonalties Across Races in the Reentry Experience
While returning women do not represent a homogeneous group, and while
literature which addresses the actual experience of college reentry for Black women is
limited, there are identifiable related themes across races which focus on role strain,
fam ily ideology and family structure with and without the context of
socioeconomic status. A major task of this research will be to explore how social class
and race may contextualize these three differently.
Role Strain. Marital status is an important factor in the accumulation of behaviors
and obligations that may eventually conflict when a woman returns to school. Berkove
(1979) reported that most women in her study were able to obtain their husband’s support
to return to school if it could be assumed that their family and household responsibilities
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would not change. The study also supported the finding that husbands expect that even
though a wife has returned to school, her family obligations would be primary (Berkove,
1979; Brandenberg, 1974).
The presence of a husband, even though he may represent a resource in income
and potential child care, does not necessarily reduce the amount of work or commitment
required as a wife and mother (Katz & Piotrkowski, 1983). In fact, Hartmann (1981) has
suggested that husbands might be viewed as a “net drain on a woman’s resources.” She
found that single women, with the same amount of children as their married counterparts,
spent less time doing housework. A husband therefore may reduce some stress by
contributing to income and providing a degree of emotional support, but may actually
increase the work load by contributing to additional housework. Nonsupportive husbands
also increase levels of tension around family issues of housework, children’s needs or
psychological commitment (VanMeter& Agronow, 1982).
Confirming these findings, in a study of role strain in a sample of fifty-one black
women (who were employed, but who were not reentry women), Katz and Piotrkowski
(1983) found that family size was a greater contributor to “managing family roles” than
the absence of a husband. The women in their study placed priority on interacting with
their children and would let housework lapse if time became limited, as a way of
minimizing conflicting obligations. The establishment of priorities seems to remain an
important variable in both eliciting support from husband and family members as well as
acting as a coping/management technique (VanMeter & Agronow, 1982).
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To mediate the overload which emerges from the demands of child care, work,
education and relationships, African-American mothers in a study by Edith Lewis (1988)
used the support of extended kin, friends, partners and their religious community as a
network system. Lewis found there was an “inverse relationship between the use of
support networks and African-American mothers’ reports of parental role strain” (p. 79)
Lewis’ findings also supported studies (Katz & Piotrkowski, 1983; Kessler & Essex,
1982) that indicated a positive relationship between the conflict of priorities and number
of children in the home. Similarly, marital status was not significantly related to this
conflict. This suggests how valuable outside resources become to the reentry process. If
a mother has neither the available social network nor the available income to hire
assistance, her level of role strain increases, and the chances for her success diminish.
Nevertheless, after reentry most married women continue to take full responsibility
for their traditional household tasks (Berkove, 1979). Contributing to role-strain and
associated with their desires to maintain pre-reentry life-style standards for their families,
is an ongoing sense of mother/wife guilt.
It has been suggested by LeFevre (1972, in Ballmer & Cozby, 1981) that guilt is
associated with the fact that as women return to school the perceptions of their identities
is challenged. LeFevre suggests that the “returning college woman seems to see herself
during the initial college semesters as a homemaker who is going back to school,” not as a
student with household responsibilities. Thus she experiences strain between these two
role types.
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The additional set of interest and priorities the reentry student has acquired
unbalances the family status quo, producing an unstable family system condition known as
a triangle. Triangling (Bowen, 1982; Broderick, 1983), is a situation or process in which
a partner perceives, experiences or manipulates an asymmetrical relationship between the
couple and a third entity. They are not more prone to one culture, social class, or time
period than any other. Some therapists (Kerr, 1981) have suggested that triangling may
be a universal phenomenon. In this study, the third efttity would be the college reentry
process. In other words, college would be the triangled-in member of the relationship. It
is possible then to glimpse the complex dynamic that may exist for couples when the wife
returns to school. Instead of only being concerned with the needs of the partner (and
family members), a third entity now requires consideration and attention not only from the
returning student, but on some level from every member of the family.
The woman who returns to work is often satisfied with a
relatively limited job as long as her motive to earn a little
money is met. In contrast, the woman who enters higher
education is accepting a commitment to a higher standard of
performance and effort, which she and her husband may be
ill prepared to accept (Lee, 1973). When she discovers that
she is capable of fulfilling this commitment and proceeds to
demonstrate her academic proficiencies, it appears to
present a threatening situation to both marriage partners
(Ballmer & Cozby, (1981).
Triangling can occur not only with spouses, but also between other family members and
college.
One’s location in a triangle will impact the level of stress that the person
experiences. So, Bowen (1982) would say that stress is positional, not just the result of
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events or other factors. When someone takes on the responsibility for other parts of the
triangle, the level of stress for that person increases. And increased stress intensifies role
strain.
Family Ideology. For reentry women family obligations are crucial variables in the
decision to return to school. Jerold Heiss (1975), who studied Black family structures,
using marital stability, aid from kin, and control of decisions as variables, acknowledges
similarities between Black and white families:
Taking all the dependent variables into account, we see an
impressive degree of similarity between the dynamics of
white and black families. Certainly they are not identical.
Usually, however, the patterns are unmistakably similar. It
seems clear that black and white families work under similar
principles...” (p.227).
The institution of the family exists as an important one for reentry women of both races
(Hill, 1972; Mohney & Anderson, 1988; Katz & Piotrkowski, 1983; Gutman, 1976;
Teachman & Paasch, 1989). Identifying another similarity, the literature indicates both
black and white reentry families hold deep respect for the value of education, both for its
own sake and its impact on mobility (Mohney & Anderson, 1988; Astin, 1976;
Featherman & Hauser, 1978; McAdoo, 1988).
The same gender ideology that produces role strain is also a part of the family
ideology that defines what resentments, sacrifices, opportunities, or feelings of gratitude
will be experienced among its members, especially between husband and wife.
(Hochschild, 1989). Standards of expected contributions on emotional, physical and
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financial levels are generally understood, if not verbalized, and are acted upon as known
quantities. This may involve individual perceptions of personal identity.
Hooper (1979) suggests that there is interplay between a woman’s self-esteem and
her ability to achieve self-actualization in her family, and there does appear to be a strong
correlation between the need for family support and self-confidence.
Husbands’ attitudes and expectations may be challenged by his their wives
decisions to return to school. Depending on their own identity, in the family “economy of
gratitude” (Hochschild, 1989), they may experience a wide range of responses to the
accommodations they are required to make in order to be supportive of their wives’
endeavors. From a husband’s perspective, the challenges to his own gender ideology and
the required spousal accommodations to be supportive of his wife’s goal may seem
somewhat overwhelming.
Paul Bohannon (1972) offered a theory of stages of marital discord, and one of
them was the situation wherein one partner remains static as far as personal growth is
concerned and the other partner is consciously attempting to pursue growth. Thus, he
saw an unequal growth in partners as potential marital strain and a cause of conflict.
The particular dilemma of African-American men experience wherein their ability
to financially support their families has been restricted, as well as their difficulty in
acquiring the other resources and rewards of society cannot be minimized. However, the
benefit of Ballmer & Cozby’s and Bohannon’s insights are to expand the discussion
beyond ethnicity to observe what may be normative for a majority of male and female
relationships. That is, that individual families have developed ideologies that reflect
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attitudes about gender, which are based in a context of racial identities and social class. In
order to facilitate individual growth, each family must strategize to create their own
customized life-style behaviors and attitudes to accommodate the pursuit of the personal
goals of each member.
Family Structure. Economic status is a powerful variable in explaining family
structure. Family employment patterns, hierarchies, number of children, marriage and
divorce rates, are only a few of the most obvious responses by families to economic
conditions. Separating the examination of family structure from economics would
minimally allow for only the narrowest view of family life, in macro statistics or in the
micro family process of the home. For example, currently higher divorce rates, higher
rates of female headed households, deferred marriages and social change across economic
strata have contributed to the decline in numbers of Black married couple families, as well
as contributing to the decline in the number of white married couple families.
In fact, economics and family structure combine to raise questions with regards to
the decision to return to school. Every family has many types of hierarchies. The
priorities for allocating funds, time, energy or support will be different for each family
depending on their internal hierarchies and the place in which the family sits in the societal
hierarchy. For instance, what are the different considerations for mothers who are family
breadwinners or for mothers who are not? The most obvious dilemma is financing, when
the mother has been responsible for a portion (or all) of the family income. However,
there are more subtle questions about family hierarchies and relationships when a
breadwinner becomes an economic dependent rather than provider; or, when a non-
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breadwinner is no longer available to provide the creature comforts her family may have
become accustomed to.
For adult mothers, the return to formal education will likely disrupt the established
routines of family life. By extension, the expectations of being a wife and/or mother,
obligatory tasks, time and energy levels, as well as family support which may have been
taken for granted become objects of change, adaptation, and possible restructuring.
Education, parental and spousal obligations and employment requirements may be difficult
to combine, or in the extreme, may be the source of conflict for some women.
The reentry process for Black and white women has been molded by their
individual niches in the family and in society. Not only their duties, but the meanings
ascribed to those duties enable or constrain their pursuits of personal educational goals.
Race and Social Class
It has been suggested that values and beliefs, attitudes toward children, the
presence or absence of husbands and fathers, the employment of either or both parents all
vary according to social class (Davis, 1981; Wilson, 1980; Billingsley, 1969) and not
cultural ideology.
For example, Glick (1988) states that in 1985, there were twenty-five percent as
many Black divorced persons as Black married persons. He further notes that for all races
the likelihood of divorce is negatively correlated with income for men and positively
correlated for women. It would appear that as socioeconomic advantages increase, the
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statistical differences for marriage and divorce between ethnicities diminish. According to
Glick (1988)
Among men in 1980 who were simultaneously in the highest
educational level and the highest income level, there was no
significant racial difference with respect to the proportion
still in their first marriages at the age o f45-54 years (p 122).
According to Yeakey & Bennett (1990) who cite Cohen (1979) “when husband’s
age is controlled, the higher the husband’s earnings the less likely both African-American
and white couples are to separate of divorce” (p.9 in Yeakey & Bennett, 1990). This
suggests that knowing one’s social class may be a better predictor of marital status than
predicting by race.
With regard to family size, education and income, Glick (1988) reports that poorly
educated Black women tend to have more children than their counterparts of other races,
but highly educated black women have about as few children as those of other races. For
example, Glick indicates that in 1982, Black women 35-44 years of age with less than a
full high school education had an average of 3.8 children, as compared with 3.1 for
comparable women of all races. However, the same type of rate for college graduates was
1.8 for Black women and also for all women. So, Glick observes, at the higher
educational levels the average size of family for the two racial groups converged.
Thus Glick (1988) suggests that stereotyping the Black family with only one model
is a mistake. He offers a quote from Willie (1970) which states that, “the ‘Negro family’
is itself a fiction. Different family forms prevail at different class and income levels
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throughout our society” (in Glick, 1988, p. 111). In other words, as socioeconomic status
increases, race becomes a less reliable predictor and social class a more reliable predictor.
It is apparent that economics may be seen as a crucial variable in explaining many
of the differences and similarities in experiences of reentry students. Income levels impact
choice of school, type of school program, and opportunity to obtain outside resources that
can mitigate role strain. How do race and class interact? While race remains a strong
variable, in some situations is one more salient than the other?
African-American Families
Over time, there has been much disparity within Black families, as they range from
single mothers who receive public assistance and manage to raise their children to
upwardly mobile, one or two-earner families with incomes above $50,000 per year. In
fact, in 1985, forty-one percent of married couple families had median incomes of
$25,000-49,999, while nineteen percent had median incomes of $50,000 or more
(McAdoo, 1988). Black women continue to work to support their families, in fact, Willie
(1985) asserts that one significant difference between middle-class Black women and
middle-class white women is the greater likelihood that Black middle-class mothers will be
employed. Black married couple families with working wives have median incomes nearly
double the median incomes of all other Black families. Contrasting this, white married
couple families with working wives have median incomes just twenty-seven percent higher
than median incomes of all white families (Malveaux, 1988). So, it would appear that the
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work efforts of Black women contribute more toward maintaining the family income level
than they do in white families.
The greatest change of the past thirty years for Black families has been the increase
of female-headed households and the growth of the African-American underclass (Yeakey
& Bennett, 1990; Wilson, 1987). Forty-six percent of Black families are headed by
women, and more than half of those are living in poverty. This pattern is reflective of the
macroeconomic structure (Wilson, 1987) and not driven by a lack of normative values as
the Moynihan report (Moynihan, 1986, 1965) has suggested.
In spite of economic obstacles, the institution of the family remains an important
one in Black culture (Hill, 1972), and studies indicate that family life is a major source of
life satisfaction (Teachman & Paasch, 1989). Cazenave (1983) studied 155 middle-class
African-American men, examining the intersection of male/female relationships, economics
and racism. The results of this study indicated that for his sample, “the notion of Black
matriarchy is a myth.” For the most part the men saw poor communication as the major
problem in their relationships, not economics. They did not feel that Black women had
too much control in families or that there was growing distrust between African-American
men and women. They did believe Black women had more opportunities than men, but
had no consensus whether African-American women were at fault for keeping men down.
However, unmarried men and those with lower incomes were more likely to express
feelings of distrust. Cazaneve proposes that a major factor in how these relationships are
perceived is attached to Black men’s own sense of insecurity with the social system, their
personal experience in male/female relationships and racism. Cazaneve suggests that
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perceptions of racism may intersect with male/female relationships, to some degree or
another in most relationships.
Increases in economic resources begin to produce similarities in life-styles.
Malveaux (1988) points out that the gap between white and Black families is most narrow
for married couples with working wives. As more and more similarities in life styles
become the norm, it may also bring about a greater comfort with the white social
structure, or possibly a somewhat reduced sense of alienation. For instance, Bebe Moore
Campbell (1993) quotes a Black woman who is vice-president of the business division of
a large bank in Los Angeles, as saying, “I have less in common with those people who
used to be my friends. I have more in common with those of the same class or income, be
they Black or white” (in Cyrus, 1993, p. 109). Statements such as this suggest that bonds
may form within economic strata, in spite of differences in ethnicity. Jackson (1973)
supports this notion, also asserting that Blacks and whites in similar socioeconomic
positions tend to resemble each other more than those of the same race in different
socioeconomic positions. “In most major respects there are no significant differences
between blacks and whites of similar education, occupations, employment, and income
levels where similarities with respect to family background (e.g., family size) also persist.
Perhaps those differences which do persist may be best explained by racism” (p.440).
Education and Mobility
Historically, because Black women’s occupational alternatives were limited, the
“one avenue out of poverty and being a maid or domestic worker was higher education”
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(Sokolof£ 1992). Still, between 1960-1980 half of the top ten largest areas for new jobs
for African-American women remain in the female professions and technical fields
(elementary education, nursing, social work, pre-kindergarten and kindergarten teaching
and clinical-laboratory technology). The other new jobs were found in gender-neutral
professions such as personnel and labor relations, secondary education and counseling.
During the same period Black women’s occupational growth rate was below that of white
men and black men, but higher than that of white women (Sokoloff, 1992).
Educational attainment does not necessarily guarantee large amounts of mobility.
It is the case that much of the education attained by African-Americans is not
occupationally high-return. One-to-two years of college is neither degree-producing nor
sufficient to provide a financially lucrative career. At the end of the 1980’s, 43% of all
African-Americans enrolled in institutions of higher education in America were attending
community colleges (Monk-Tumer, 1990). Thus, they were at the beginning of a longer
educational career, or acquiring a minimum degree education which would provide lower
income. However, Wilson (1987) points out that in the West, where Black males have
higher education levels, they also have lower combined unemployment and labor-force
nonparticipation rates than in the rest of the nation.
Because in the past, few Black families have had substantial wealth or financial
resources to pass onto the next generation, it has become necessary for each generation to
create their own mobility cycle. Education has been seen as one path to mobility, and
McAdoo (1988) states, “the greatest gift a Black family has been able to bestow upon its
children has been the motivation and the skills necessary to succeed in school” (p. 154).
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Unfortunately, although education for their children has been valued, it has often been
difficult, if not impossible to secure this asset for Black youth. McAdoo characterized
four types of mobility patterns based on educational attainment. The first group were
individuals who were bom as working class, but had achieved middle-class by obtaining
professional degrees. Their parents usually had a grade school or less than high school
education, with mothers being better educated than fathers. While most of the
grandparents in this group had only grade school educations, seventeen percent did attend
college. As a group the parents and grandparents had a little more education than average
for contemporary African-Americans and were able to get solid, respectable working-class
jobs in the community.
The next group was characterized by mobility which extended through three
economic levels over three generations. The grandparents lived in lower-class poverty
levels, the parents attained working class status and the current subjects had achieved
middle class status. This group reflected the highest academic levels with almost all
subjects having college or advanced degrees. Of all four groups this one had the highest
levels of education, occupational achievement and income. Coincidentally, they also
reflected the lowest level of stress of the four groups.
The third pattern reflected subjects who had been bom into the middle class. Their
grandparents were working class people and it was in their parent’s generation that the
rise to middle class had taken place. Educational attainment had decreased in the present
generation of this group, with only twenty-nine percent having graduate or professional
training compared to sixty-three percent of their fathers and fifty percent of their mothers.
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Their well educated parents were the best educated of the four groups, with the pursuit of
an education as a conscious goal for them.
The fourth group reflected stability for three generations in middle class status.
The grandparents had been middle class and this level had been maintained into the
subjects’ generation. The subjects’ generation had the lowest levels of education of the
four groups with only thirty-three percent attending college and only nine percent with
professional degrees. The subjects’ parents held the same educational levels as the
subjects. They had maintained their status achievement, but had not been able to move
past their own parents (the subjects’ grandparents). The grandfathers, who for the most
part had been bom in the late 1800’s, were very well educated, even by today’s standards.
Even with the above average levels of education within these families, economic
mobility occurred by means of employment of both mother and father, since their dual
incomes were required to establish a middle-class life style. Pointing out again, that
women’s lives are situated at the intersection of race and social class.
Race, Gender and Social Class
While the daily routines of Black and white middle-class women may be divergent,
Black women and white women alike are affected by general societal norms that drive
what is known as accepted feminine behavior. Social class provides environments wherein
characteristic attitudes, behaviors, and life styles are predictable and somewhat
generalizable for members of their specific niche in society. Middle-class women of color
and middle-class white women may experience overlap in the patterns of expected female
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behavior, and this raises the possibility of an area of commonality for Black and white
women, especially in the reentry process. In a larger sense, the question must be asked,
“Are middle-class Black women more similar to white middle-class women than they are
to poor Black women?” Does the commonality of social class provide sufficient overlap
to allow for some sense of solidarity between African-American and white women of the
same social class?
The consideration of this idea brings to the foreground disparate views of feminist
scholars regarding the societal relationship of Black and white women as it is embedded in
a structural system of white patriarchy. According to the generic, public version of
feminist thought, “all women are oppressed.” This statement implies that women share a
common life experience and in so stating, fails to express the diversity among women
created by social class, ethnicity, religion, or sexual preference. Theorists such as Carol
Gilligan (1982) divide the social milieu into the categories of male or female, exploring
gender differences by measuring female experiences against the norm of a male
perspective. This construct has been criticized by other feminist scholars, especially Black
feminists as being not only one-dimensional, but disregarding the white supremacy that
exists in much of the feminist movement, bell hooks criticizes the 1960’s feminist writings
of Betty Friedan, stating, “She did not speak of the needs of women without men, without
children, without homes. She ignored the existence of all non-white women and poor
white women...Friedan makes clear that the women she saw as victimized by sexism were
college-educated, white women who were compelled by sexist conditioning to remain in
the home” (hooks, 1984, pp. 1-2). Thus hooks asserts that the women’s rights movement
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did not bring Black and white women closer together (1981); in fact, rhetoric that invoked
terms such as “common oppression” alienated some women of color, since white women
are not as a group oppressed in all the same ways as others who are poor or structurally
disenfranchised. Indeed, some white feminist scholars such as Marilyn Frye (in Singleton,
1989) have suggested that being white does not merely describe skin color, but also
represents a social and political construct. In other words, being white enables one to
define who will be in or out of the white group. Adrienne Rich (in Singleton, 1989),
supports this viewpoint and asserts that when everyone, irrespective of color, is seen as
white, it does not necessarily make everyone equal, it only makes everyone white. In a
colorblinded way, then, black women’s realities are lost.
Dorothy Smith has examined the female condition from a Marxist Feminist
position and observes the family relationship as a trap organized by capitalism. She states,
“It is an alliance across class and among men against women...It is a division which in fact
aligns men in this respect on the other side in the class struggle, that is, on the side of the
ruling class: (1977, pp.51-52). It is at this juncture of capitalism and patriarchy that some
scholars, both Black and white, raise the question of accountability of white women for
their part in the perpetuation of patriarchy, and by extension, racism.
Patricia Hill Collins (1990) explains that African-American women are in the
unique position of having experienced both white supremacy and male superiority and
therefore suggests that Black women must define their own reality by their own
experiences. This is not to prohibit the eventual interchange of Black and white women as
they advocate feminism, but white women must come to the realization that African-
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American women require an autonomy to which they have not been accorded at this point.
Women do share some common experiences, but some experiences based on ethnicity or
culture will by necessity be different.
Is it possible not only to respect, but to celebrate the differences among women
and still be able to achieve some solidarity based on those experiences that we do share?
Collins (1990) suggests that coalitions with varieties of groups comprised of men and of
women, both those of color as well as white will facilitate social change. She states,
“While Black feminist thought may originate with Black feminist intellectuals, it cannot
flourish isolated from the experiences and ideas o f other groups” (p. 35). Our strengths
may lie in our differences. Audre Lorde (1984) has instructed that ‘Ignoring difference or
merely tolerating it is a tool of the patriarchy. Feminist theory will not be an effective
force for social change until difference can be seen as a powerful connection between
women” (p. 112). Finally, Collins (1990) is encouraging when she states, “Through
dialogues exploring how relations of domination and subordination are maintained and
changed, parallels between Black women’s experiences and those of other groups become
the focus of investigation” (p.36)
The reentry experience is an ideal site to conduct investigations as suggested by
Collins in order to shed light on the interplay of race, social class and gender. When
aspiring to college reentry, women, Black or white, must be willing to stretch if not
challenge societal norms about feminine identities and behaviors on a societal level as well
as in their own individual lives. While there is a rich literature on the reentry experiences
of white women, there is has been little research on the same experience for middle-class
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African-American women. This research will contribute to an understanding of their
unique strategies to meet personal goals which may be constrained or at least
characterized by role strain, family ideology and family structure, as well as providing a
greater understanding of ethnic parallels and diversities among women of the same social
class. The confluence of gender, race and social class are embedded in many subtleties
that remain intact, in spite of conscious statements of good intentions or legislation.
Identified individually, the consequences and dynamics associated with poverty, gender
differentiation or ethnicity appear to be discrete categories. However, in reality they exist
as a complex interplay of social, economic and psychological variables. Exploring ethnic
diversity in women of the same social class allows for the examination of social class as a
mediator across ethnicities, of race and ethnicity as a dividing line within a social class and
perhaps, in the process, teasing out some of the subtle interplays when gender, race and
class converge.
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Chapter Two
METHODS
The Sample
I conducted semi-structured, indepth interviews with twenty-five Black women,
some of whom described themselves as African or African-American, while others
identified themselves as being from Trinidad or Puerto Rico. For the purposes of this
study, the terms African-American and Black will be used interchangeably, though it is
recognized that personal definitions of country of origin differ among these respondents.
To be eligible for the study, a potential respondent was required to have a
minimum age of at least thirty years, married or unmarried at the time of the interview, but
must be living with one or more family members. Finally, she must also be enrolled in at
least two classes at a community college, college or university.
Because of the inclusion of unmarried women in this study the term family was
defined as including all members of the reentry student's immediate household. This
included mother, brothers, sisters or other quasi-kin residing in the same home.
The sample was collected throughout the Los Angeles metropolitan area, using a
snowball method of referral; or in some cases, contact was made via referrals to specific
campus programs involving returning women.
The ages of the respondents ranged from thirty-six to forty-nine years old. At the
time of the interviews, all were enrolled in at least two classes. Eight were part-time
students, seven were full-time in a weekend program and ten were full-time in four-year or
community junior colleges. Six of the students were involved in evening classes: One in a
full-time law program, two in part-time evening programs, one part-time student with a
class in the day and in the evening, and two carried full-time class loads with their
schedules including both day and/or night classes.
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Family structure included single parent (n=5) two parent (n=20), childless (n = l)),
and extended family households (n=2). Three respondents had adult-age children who
were no longer living at home. Since the percentage of two-partner households for
African-Americans has been decreasing over time in the United States, the high percentage
of married couples in this sample, may be a result of their older age range and social class.
Twenty-one of the respondents had children living at home, from ages twelve
through twenty-four. Three of the respondents were married but had no children living at
home. One respondent was childless. Two respondents were living in homes with
members of their extended families.
Across the sample incomes ranged from $30,000 to $125,000. Incomes, therefore,
were higher for this sample than the national average for African-American families. This
unusually high income range was probably attributable to the use of a snowball method of
sample collection. In 1992, only about one in four African-American families had an
annual income of about $35,000, with only fifteen percent having incomes over $50,000.
The median family income was approximately $21,400 (U.S. Bureau of the Census, 1993).
While a snowball method of sample collection may have facilitated the actual
interview experience, in one sense it contributed to the focus of the research. Since most
of the potential referrals came from friends and acquaintances of other respondents, a
sample began to emerge that was primarily middle to upper-middle class. Initially, this
was deemed as unacceptable, since a sample of upper SES African-American women was
unrepresentative of the American population. Nevertheless, as research progressed, it
became apparent that there was potential value in the examination of middle-class Black
returning students. Currently, much o f the literature presents African-American families
from a perspective that stereotypes them as dysfunctional, with any other model seen as an
exception. However, in my research experiences, I was encountering families who were
not only coping in a eufunctional manner, but achieving as well. I observed families with
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strong intergenerational as well as intragenerational ties and bonds, life styles that bespoke
an emphasis on high personal standards and economic stability, if not affluence. It began
to appear that the middle-class African-American family was not being well-represented in
either academia or in the public domain, outside of a few recent television sitcoms.
Therefore, a middle to upper-middle-class sample became the sample of choice to begin an
examination of a particular group of returning students as well as addressing the notion
that members of the same social class, regardless o f ethnicity, may have more in common
with each other than with some groups within their own race.
In this sample, ten respondents were in the $30,000-550,000 range; nine
respondents were in the $50,000-575,000 range; and six were in the $75,000-$125,000
range. (See tables in appendix, p. 166)
While one must be reminded that “ideal type” broad characterizations may have
only limited benefit, such class characterizations of African-American families have been
offered by Doris Y. Wilkenson (1984), who cites Willie (1976). She states that middle
class families are characterized by:
1) relatively sufficient family income,
2) conformity to American norms of morality,
3) close supervision of childhood,
4) dual employment of husband and wife,
5) at least one spouse with a college education,
6) belief in upward mobility
7) close attachment and involvement with children’s goals and lives, and
8) expectation that offspring will use their parents as role models.
Upper class families are characterized by:
1) inherited wealth,
2) sufficient economic security,
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3) home ownership,
4) inherited property,
5) long history of stability,
6) middle to upper class life style background,
7) organizationally-oriented rather than church centered,
8) sharing the customs and habit of the wealthy, and
7) wives, if employed, are in high status occupations.
These characteristics may help to provide some broadly drawn identifying parameters of
the sample, but are in no way intended to be seen as inclusive or exclusive.
These returning students financed their educations in a variety of combinations and
from a variety of sources. Eleven respondents were receiving some sort of government
financial aid and saw this as their greatest source of financial support. Ten students
reported that the majority of their school expenses were funded by themselves. However,
some of these students also reported that on occasion they had acquired some government
financial aid, and/or had taken advantage of employee education benefits which would
contribute a portion of their tuition. Five were more heavily reliant on their employee
benefits toward education and they personally assumed responsibility for the remainder of
their expenses.
Across the sample, respondents stated that family members or close friends would
contribute from time to time towards their education. These contributions would come as
birthday gifts, Christmas gifts or spontaneous surprises, and may be in the form of cash,
school supplies, new clothes or pledges toward their registration fees for one or more
classes. One student described an experience with her best friend whom she said was
planning to return to school after her children were olden
It was the beginning of the school year when all the stores are selling
back-to-school stuff. My best friend dropped by with a bag full of
pens, pencils, paper, and underliners as a back-to-school present for
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me. She said she'd been out shopping with her kids and decided it
would be fun for me to be outfitted too. Fortunately, she didn't bring
me anything with Hello Kitty or Power Rangers on it [Big laugh].
Another respondent, who was enrolled part-time at a community college, reported,
"For Christmas this last year, my mother gave me $50.00 with a card that said she was
proud I was taking classes and told me to use the money towards school."
Data Collection
Data was collected by means of in-depth semi-structured interviews, each a
minimum of one to two-hours in length or longer as relevant to each respondent. While
the interviews were open-ended and framed according to the individual respondent's
experiences, the following over-arching topics provided parameters and general direction.
The Interview Questions
1. The decision to return to college. What were the circumstances or
events which led the respondent to choose to return to school?
What did other family members contribute to the choice?
2. Family attitudes toward education. Educational attainment of other
family members (family of origin, children, husband)? Personal
value of education? Family value of education?
3. Personal goals. Personal anticipated achievements? What will
education provide for the respondent? How do personal goals and
family obligations interact?
4. Family structure. Family hierarchy and power structure. How are
rules make or changed? Is the structure rigid or flexible? How are
tasks designated?
5. College experience. Personal experience as a student. Perceptions
of family responses. Interfacing college responsibilities with
mothering and wifing.
6. Personal and family change. Change in personal attitudes and
behaviors. Change perceived as positive or negative. Family
and marital relationship change. Change as temporary accommodation
or permanent state.
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These broad topical areas listed above do not represent the specific questions that
were used in the interview process. Rather, they were used as markers to give the
interviews a direction, not a shape. The interview questions used in the study to insure
adequate coverage of the subject, are included in the appendix.
The research was conducted without the formation of any hypotheses, allowing for
the exploration of each student to be unique. The respondent was given the opportunity
to select the location for the interview, i.e., at her home, office, college campus or
elsewhere, as a means of promoting comfort, confidentiality and a degree of informality.
A small pilot study of four interviews was conducted to facilitate the refinement of
the interview questions and overall design, and to gain insights into the special areas of
concern for these students.
Entry into the Sample. The method of referral had a large impact on the character
of the occasion of initial contact with the respondent as well as the on the actual
interview. It seemed that the interviews which were conducted with those who had either
previously known the interviewer or, as was mostly the case, a common acquaintance
introduced the research project and the interviewer to the potential respondent, were those
interviews in which the most sharing took place and were the most relaxed for both
interviewer and participant. It seemed these previously "briefed" respondents were able to
begin the interview with some foundation of trust as to the purpose of the research and the
expectation that their stories would be treated with respect.
For those respondents whose names only were provided with their identification as
African-American women who had returned to college, who did not necessarily know or
have previous contact with the researcher, or who had not shared a common association, a
somewhat different interview experience occurred. The process from the beginning, as
contact was being established and consent to be interviewed was being obtained, was a
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different experience. For instance, if the first attempt to make telephone contact resulted
in leaving a message on an answering machine which included a brief explanation of the
purpose of the call, subsequent telephone calls were necessary in order to make contact
with the individual. In other words, the initial message was not returned. Further, more
time was also required in the introduction of the project to help encourage an agreement
to be interviewed. This suggests that an intermediary who is acquainted with both the
interviewer or researcher and the potential respondent increases the probability of
obtaining an agreement to participate. It is likely that this may be the case for any
interview requests by researchers, regardless of the topic.
It should be noted that one comment in the context of the introduction to the
project which seemed to facilitate consent, was found to be describing myself as a
returning student now in graduate school, who was interested in learning about other
returning women's' experiences. It was also found to be very important to the potential
respondent to learn why a white researcher would be interested in studying the African-
American experience.
My own experiences as a reentry student and my reminiscences of African-
American reentry women with whom I had formed acquaintances and friendships during
that time were important in establishing rapport with respondents. They were interested in
knowing the sort of things that I had shared in common with women of color (such as the
jokes we would make about "desperation strategies" for those days when the laundry
wouldn't get done) and what things I believed were different in our experiences. It was at
this point of understanding what things in their lives made their reentry experience unique
that my own interest became piqued. My desire to understand their lives and their
motivations seemed to be what allowed me entree into their personal stories.
Once the respondent was convinced that this research was not being conducted
simply out of voyeuristic curiosity or other more superficial or, alternatively, negatively
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perceived value-laden reasons, the interview process was possible. The "name only"
referrals nevertheless remained somewhat more skeptical, and generally yielded interviews
with a different tone than those which resulted from personal referrals; that is, through
those who had personally recommended the interviewer. Without this type of
"testimonial" entree, questions continued to be asked throughout the interviews such as,
"So tell me again why you are studying us?" or "What are going to do with this
information?" or How is this going to help Black women?"
Additionally, in the responses given by the three respondents who did not have an
intermediary introduction to the interviewer, it was observed that throughout the course of
these interviews, the ethnic difference between respondent and interviewer was most
frequently highlighted in a variety of ways. These interviews contained more statements
of a generalizing nature, reflecting beliefs that there was little diversity among life
experiences or attitudes of African-Americans in our stratified society.
The Black Respondent-White Researcher Dilemma. While the channel of entry
into the sample seemed to create some variation in the interview, a greater variable was
that of race. The impact of a white researcher interviewing Black respondents, as is the
case in this study, cannot be minimized. It is well known that cross-gender interviews
pose particular challenges and that gender matters in most areas of social research
(Warren, 1988). Likewise differences in cultural and ethnic origin also must be viewed as
a crucial variable of the interview structure.
Blauner and Wellman (1973) have used an apt analogy to examine the particular
relationship of white researcher and Black respondent. They characterize the pair as the
oppressor and the oppressed. Not only is there the real difference which exists between
the studier and the studied, but additionally the often unspoken sentiment is that neither
researcher or subject can grasp the other's motivations, point of view or life experience
outside of a very narrow context. In this research, our very small window of commonality
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was the reentry experience, and ironically, the topic of research involved the
deconstruction and analysis of that common experience. All of which contributed
to a fragile bond to say the least.
By framing the interview as a conversation between "two reentry students, sharing
and comparing their experiences," some bridge of understanding was maintained. The
"frame" of the interview was not an empirical positivistic examination, but a respectful
exploration of a colleague's experience which was from the outset defined as difficult and
praiseworthy. Nevertheless, the difference in life experience, especially when it was
combined with economic disadvantage as a life style, made for strain and distrust. For
example, throughout the interview with one of respondents from the lower SES group,
she would spontaneously stop the flow of the interview, to ask questions such as, “Now
how is this dissertation you’re doing going to help my people?” To which I could only
reply that I couldn’t say for sure, but that it seems women had to start somewhere to help
change things, and maybe learning about the experiences of women of color would be a
useful beginning. At least it would provide us a way to begin to get to know one another.
As I reflect on this response now, it seems trite and almost patronizing. Although my
intent was honest, to assume that by having a conversation with someone and then writing
about it, was going to improve this woman’s life was presumptive to say the least, and I’m
sure she must have recognized it. At that time I was probably more accurately perceived
as part of the problem, not part of the solution.
It is with the clarity of hindsight that I reflect on the awkward position of those
women who expressed difficulty with the entire social economic structure and by
extension, difficulty with a white researcher. Indeed, their initial response to me may have
been as Blauner and Wellman suggested, seeing me as their oppressor. To assume that
they would view me otherwise would have been asking them to step beyond their reality,
and unwisely trust someone who had not proven herself. Although it seemed problematic
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to me at the time, looking back, I respect their candor and courage in being honest about
their hesitancy with me.
I observed that the two respondents, who were in the lower SES level o f the
sample related their current life situations to the results of societal structural inequality,
which is not meant to imply that this was incorrect. However, whereas they identified
their own difficulties from a viewpoint of structural prejudice and discrimination, the
higher SES respondents seemed to identify discriminatory interactions on an event by
event or individual basis.
Further, the lower SES level respondents' interviews contained more statements of
a generalizing nature about the Black experience as they saw it, and throughout the
interviews their observations were woven into their own stories. For example, a part-
time student employed full-time began to describe her personal difficulty with financial aid,
taking a different direction midway into her response on the subject in the following
manner Question: Is that the major problem, as you see it, money? Answer
Finances. I think we have been labeled. Let's not even get to the
economics, let's talk just about labeling. When a person comes back
to school, and you're sitting in a class, and there's this African-
American student, well the first thing you do is put all the negatives
with that African-American student. Instead of just seeing an
individual coming in here and do as great a work and work as hard as
anybody else, and on the average, African-Americans work twice as
hard. We're behind in education. You have to understand, we've
been here 500 years, we've only been able to read and write for the
last 100 years, and you talk about people's accomplishments, we've
accomplished a lot.
Another respondent described her feelings when asked about the value of
education to her, said,
Because as far as I see it, I feel that education will revert back to
slavery pretty soon. We wont be able to afford it anyway. We cant
afford it now, no less with the price hikes going up for school and
everything, afford it in the future.
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We can observe in these responses that the respondents did not talk about then-
own experiences, but instead generalized to the African-American population. Supporting
this notion is a somewhat parallel statement made by Noel Cazenave (1983), in his earlier
cited study of middle-class African-American men. Cazenave differentiated between the
more positive perceptions of male-female relationships by married men and the more
negative perceptions held by unmarried men. Further he observed these same differences
between economic groups. He stated, “The lower family income men were also much
more likely to report that there was growing distrust and hatred among black men and
black women.” Additionally, he stated, “Men who were not currently married were much
more likely to agree or strongly agree that there is growing distrust and hatred between
black men and black women compared to those who were currently married” (p.346).
This is not offered as a confirmation or a suggestion of generalization of belief patterns,
but does raise the question of possible influence on attitudes based on an individual’s sense
of being a member, a potential member or a disenfranchised member of a group and/or
institution, i.e., social class, marital partnership, etc. Those who see themselves on the
“outside,” may have a greater tendency to generalize experiences than those who are
functionally interacting with social systems (be they personal or public) on an individual
basis.
Compare this to the statement by a full-time law student in an evening program,
discussing her sense of belonging in the educational system:
I can only speak from my experience and I guess in my most recent
experience, I get the sense that it is a white system, that they are
tolerating us, because of the law. I don't have a feeling of (pause) I
don't have any reservations about talking to people if I believe that
I'm being mistreated, or that things are not the way that they should
be. I don't have a problem talking about it. I had one instructor,
writing instructor, she was not a lawyer, a Ph.D. in English, and her
husband was a lawyer. And being in her class, you'd get vibes, her
mannerisms and everything, she made me uncomfortable. I can recall
going to her office, for one on one, like I'm sitting next to you, about
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this close, and she was doing this (body language indicating
withdrawal) trying to get into herselfj and feeling very uncomfortable
with me, so much so that I could recognize it. I don't trip a lot, in
regards to I don't feel upset, I'm not on the defensive an awful lot, I
don't feel I have to be. So, like meeting you, I'm not sitting here
feeling uncomfortable with feeling that I can't talk. Well, she didn't
hit me that way. So much so that I really had a problem, because I
felt like because of her body language that she didn't have your best
interests at heart, you know?
In addition to economic variables, the fact that a personal referral seemed to
produce a greater comfort level for many of the respondents, could have also had the
effect of causing respondents to be more careful about making statements that may reflect
negatively on them or their friends. So, this could be a possible reason why generalized
statements regarding the Black experience were not made by respondents in this group.
However, it is significant to note that Wilson (1987) describes the approach known
as "the black perspective," as involving an "ideological shift from interracialism to racial
solidarity" (p. 127). He further suggests that "racial solidarity tends to emerge when
minority race members perceive the struggle against racial inequality as hopeless...or when
they experience intense disillusionment and frustration immediately following a period of
optimism or heightened expectations" (p. 127). It may be that the lower SES respondents
are representative of this perspective and are reflecting their perceptions of ongoing or
intensified struggles to achieve in the face of structural obstacles. If it is true as Wilson
(1978) states that social class is a more important variable than race in determining Black
life in contemporary society, then it would seem logical to surmise that middle-class
African-Americans might have a lesser sense of victimization by the social structure.
As difficult as it may be for a white woman and Black woman to achieve trust and
comfort as they discuss their respective life experiences, at least in this study, there was
some rapport that developed around mother tasks and mother-child relationships. For
those of us that had children, we were able to laugh and groan over the fevers, nausea or
diarrhea that youngsters invariably developed the night before a mid-term exam or when a
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major paper was due. These were definitely points of connection where we each could
believe the other understood.
However, beyond the mother identity was the married student's place in her
husband's life. The conversations about husband-wife relationships were filled with
emotions and statements such as, "Well, that's how he is," reflecting amusement or
acceptance to statements like "He doesn't know me," tinged with regret and loneliness.
In some cases there was reticence on the part of the respondent when I requested an
interview with her husband, and it was here that my entree again was stymied due to racial
differences. A few respondents told me directly, that their husbands would be
uncomfortable talking to a woman and I was a double whammy: a white woman. A few
suggested their spouses would be flattered and helped to arrange an interview, while
others said they would check with their mates and get back to me. This final category was
characterized by a series of excuses for why the interview must be delayed and so I
eventually quit asking.
However, after interviewing four husbands, I made the decision to eliminate
husbands from the sample. Each of these husbands was polite and gracious to me during
the interview process as I visited with them in the company of their wives and also alone,
either in restaurants or in their homes. They seemed eager to speak about their feelings
regarding their wives’ educational careers. Surprisingly, if I had not known to which
student each man belonged, I could not have matched them, because their reflections were
so different than their wives. Family literature (Weiss, 1975; Broderick, 19S8) speaks of
"his and her" marriages, but this was extreme. For example, I was aware that one of these
couples had endured a divorce and reconciliation because of an extra-marital affair which
had been explained to them by a therapist as his response to her school attendance.
During the conjoint piece of the interview, this husband reported how absolutely
supportive he was of his wife's goals and how pleased he was that she was in school.
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Further, he stated that her return to college had not placed any strains on their
relationship. Having already interviewed his wife and knowing about the marital crisis
they had survived because of school, I was unprepared for his denial. His wife and I
exchanged astonished glances, but she did not challenge his statements.
I, of course, acknowledge the importance of the implications of differing
statements between husbands and wives. The research questions raised by this
phenomenon are complex, and I believe are beyond the scope of this study. The
differences may be attributed to the fact of my femaleness alone and their desire to appear
to be an ideal mate, or the fact that I am white may have evoked a desire to keep their
private lives to themselves, beyond the scrutiny and possible derision they may have
anticipated. Thus, they may have told me what seemed appropriate and compliant. Also,
the fact that the wife may not necessarily challenge their differing statements in front of a
white woman became another variable, or the wife may not challenge her husband because
she may have not been altogether accurate in her own representation and therefore could
not challenge his statements. All in all, these implications appear to warrant an entire
study on the husband-wife relationship as it stands alone, which was not the goal of my
research. Husbands' opinions were anticipated as complementary data to fill in the gaps
left in the student's perceptions, and not, at least for this study, to be the basis of a new
set of research questions. Further, based on the irregularities of their statements, the
information I might glean may or may not be helpful in gaining insights into the reentry
experience. The fact that husbands may tend to tell different stories than their wives is
important, the content of such interviews for the purposes of my study is not as relevant.
This is further evidence of the complications and limitations of cross-gender and
cross-ethnic research. The hierarchy of researcher and subject is a great enough restraint
in itself as it limits candor, with the addition of an already hierarchically perceived ethnic
relationship added to the complex interaction between male and female in the interview
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process, the product of such an interaction itself must remain questionable, not
withstanding the emotional residue left for the subject.
The dilemma of white researchers studying African-Americans has some parallels
to the dilemma presented by feminist theorists that suggest white women and women of
color cannot identify with one another because while both wome may be products of white
patriarchy, one is still embedded and functional in it. The research mindset may be seen as
similar, since white researchers cannot completely remove themselves from the system in
which they were produced and may be supported. Singleton (1989) raises the question,
“What are the implications of white women producing knowledge about Black women?”
She suggests that one defense of such studies is that good and careful scholarship should
define the product. However, she further states that if careful scholarship us the only
crtierion used to judge the value of scholarship, then “the historical construction of power
relationships between Black and white women” (p. 17) has been ignored. She concludes
that “Whether or not one does good or bad scholarship...is secondary. The more
fundamental question is, what does it mean to produce knowledge and, in production,
what relationships are created by the scholar” (p. 17)?
Wisdom and Knowledge. This research has pointed out that it is impossible to be
completely value-neutral, and it must be realized that one can only perceive another ethnic
group’s reality on a superficial level. Even the choice of questions or vocabulary may
carry reflections of bias, not to mention ignorance of another’s culture. It therefore
required a conscious effort to constantly be aware of this dilemma and address it.
Inductive methods, which do not focus on the formation of hypotheses, were been used to
reduce the effects of bias. While generally speaking a “white” model as a measure of
normative attitudes or behaviors has been avoided, middle-class norms have been used as
comparative tools to examine the reentry experience to gain insights into the salience of
social class as a factor in the lives of middle-class African-American women.
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An etic view of Black middle-class women reflecting the statistical representation
of women of color in educational and/or professional careers has not been sufficient to
provide an understanding of obstacles and motivations to their achievement. Qualitative
research methods have facilitated getting in touch with the two interdependent levels of
knowledge referred to by Berger and Luckman (1966). They described the first level as
being the type one takes for granted, that allows comfortable interaction in society. The
other is a more specialized type that is furnished by experts (in this case reentry women),
who may speak for the group as members. Both are important.
Positivist approaches are limited in their usefulness in studying Black women,
according to Patricia Hill Collins (1989), because they can produce only objective
generalizations, and thus disregard one level of knowledge. If the goal is to gain an
understanding of the Black experience, then positivism is not useful since positivists
attempt to remove, as much as possible, values, emotions and experiences, substituting
rationalism which distances them from their objects of study. Further, positivists believe
that only scientific data which is collected with strict scientific methodologies can and
should be claimed by scholars as legitimate knowledge. This singular approach is limiting,
to say the least, if a goal of social research is indeed to facilitate more than the mere
coexistence of ethnic groups.
As an instructive device, the perspective of the African-American woman becomes
vital, for Patricia Hill Collins (1989) explains that for many Black women there is an
acknowledgment of the differences between wisdom and knowledge. This difference
seems to lie in the realm of concrete experience. Experience can validate knowledge; but
knowledge in and of itself may only be reflecting some academically distant information.
She states, "In the context o f race, gender and class oppression, the distinction is essential
since knowledge without wisdom is adequate for the powerful, but wisdom is essential to
the survival of the subordinate" (p. 759). If one cannot agree that based on historical and
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contemporary social structure all women are held in subordinate positions on some level,
then maybe feminist principles that would acknowledge our points of commonality as
women, as seen in the ways women construct knowledge, can act as unifiers, since some
feminist scholars (Belenkey et al, 1986) state that "Women, as a group, are more likely
than men to use concrete knowledge [wisdom] in assessing knowledge claims" (p. 113).
Thus, communication styles became an important factor in the choice of method
data collection. June Jordan (1985) explained that a speaker and a listener is inferred in
Black language patterns, which lends itself to concrete interactive descriptions. There is
no passive voice construction. Also, since social class can both influence and be
influenced by language patterns, qualitative methods again have proved to be useful in
observing possible distinctions.
Finally, diversity in life strategy has been viewed culturally, and perceived as an
adaptive agent, since according to Dill (1979), Black women have always lived with
contradictions. Thus diversity has been characterized as a positive attribute and not a
deviant or dysfunctional aberration of the white model. Therefore, an open-ended, non
hypothesis driven interview design facilitated the expression of individual coping
strategies as possible points of pride from the viewpoint of both respondent and
researcher.
As the interviews commenced, after certain demographic questions were
answered, the question would be asked, "Why did you decide to return to college?" It
was interesting and informative to find that in most cases, the response came in the form
of a story. Respondents' beginning statements might be, "Well, when I was a little girl," or
"I have always wanted to go to college, always." From this point her experiences were
put into the context of a chronologically ordered personal history starting from her
childhood that wove family ties, responsibilities, personalities, crises, role models, ethnic
discrimination, major life events and family values into what would develop as "her story."
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It became apparent that present decisions were embedded in a complex, pragmatic, and
experiential framework of the story of her life.
The meanings attached to current relationships and experiences were often
connected with long past events. One respondent tearfully described her childhood and
how it related to her decision to return to school:
I never had a childhood because I was always in charge. Even when
my father was there my three younger sisters called me mom. Even
when they were doing okay, before he left and before the trouble
started, they would call me mom. Because being the oldest, I had to
take the punishment for whatever they did or whatever, you know.
So I grew up with that thing of always having to take charge and so
it's carried into my adult life. And I've done it with my husband and
I've done it with my children and I've just reached the point now
since I'm 49 and HI be 50 soon, and I've lived 50 years with not
having done one thing that I wanted to do. In 50 years! Oh, it's so
tragic! If I died on my birthday, the tragedy wouldn't be that I died,
everyone dies. It was that I never lived.
The interviews were punctuated with tears, laughter, and expressions of anger or
frustration by both the researcher and the respondent. In some cases, the telling of the
story seemed to elucidate patterns of thought and behavior, bringing into clarity, even as
we spoke, connections that had remained previously unrecognized. It was a though, for
some of the respondents, they were putting together puzzle pieces of their lives as they
spoke; attributing newly acquired meanings to past and present events and relationships.
It is not unreasonable, then, acknowledging the highly emotional context of most
of the interviews, that a bond of closeness which developed between us has remained
intact. I have had the pleasure of attending family birthday parties, reunions and
celebrations as a result of this study. Now one of my most cherished possessions is the
family history of one of the respondents as it was recorded and documented by her
mother.
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Analysis of Data
The data has been analyzed in such a way as to reflect the family process as new
tasks, schedules goals and obligations were either negotiated, spontaneously or merely
acted out in the family system. To facilitate this, grounded theory (Glaser & Strauss,
1967) methods which stress discovery and emergent theory were applied.
The analysis followed the model which Charmaz (1983) described in which there
are four strategies:
1) Data collection and analysis proceed simultaneously. The process of discovery,
interpretation and analysis are ongoing and interactive.
2) "Both the processes and products of research are shaped from the data rather
than from preconceived logically deduced theoretical framework" (p. 110). In other
words, literature and existing theory are not the only means of driving the research. As
the researcher explores the collected data and makes further observations, new ideas may
come directly from the field experience.
3) Systematic comparisons are made between observations that may lead the
research "beyond the confines of one topic, setting or issue" (p. 111).
4) As "grounded theorists study process, they assume that making theoretical
sense of social life is itself a process" (p. 111). This enriches further study of the data
using it to provide additional insights and new interpretations.
The data itself has suggested the headings to be used to sort observations, which
included noting family patterns, individual challenges and coping strategies. This also
allowed for flexibility and creativity in interpreting new information, impressions or
reconfiguring existing data.
Further Glaser's (1978) two-stage method of coding also proved to be helpful in
aiding ongoing analysis. The first stage was the initial stage in which the researcher begins
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to look for those things that can be defined; and the second stage was the focused stage
where the data itself produced clues, insights and direction.
Because grounded theory allows for the data to be examined from so many
perspectives, I was provided the opportunity to use my personal experiences and
perceptions as jumping off places for insights instead of viewing them as obstacles to
objective research. This enabled me to explore Black families' experiences as unique
responses to their individual pressures and experiences of structural inequality rather than
generalizing about an entire population. While the development of family structure and
interaction patterns may be seen as embedded in the structural inequality of society, it is
each family's, and each reentry student's, adaptive strategy which has been the focus of the
research.
Over the course of collecting data, patterns and themes emerged in the students'
responses, providing a framework of categories for classification. Personal and family
values about education, family decision-making, the need for coping mechanisms to
reduce family adjustment, and personal changes in attitudes and behavior appeared as
repeated story elements for the returning students. These dimensions were carried over
into the analysis as themes for characterizing the reentry experience by means of the
individual responses to them.
Any overlapping characteristics between white middle-class women and Black
middle-class women have emerged in the analysis of the data. The focus of analysis was
to provide insights into the unique collective experience of this small sample of African-
American returning students, not to compare their experience with any other group.
Similarities and mutually resonating feelings were seen as experiences that informed and
enlightened our respective reentry experiences and provided a connectedness between
middle-class women, not between races.
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Chapter Three
GOING BACK: THE DECISION TO RETURN TO SCHOOL
Emergent overarching themes in the data gave shape, if not direction, to the
collective experience of the women in this sample. In the context of these themes were
interwoven emotional struggles as well as the practical challenges that college reentry
presented. The decision to return to school was not perceived to be an impulsive desire.
Most of the subjects had a family background involving a high regard fo r education. A
heritage of educated parents and grandparents that achieved in spite o f amazing odds
against such accomplishments were reflected often among the reentry students, and this
seemed to be a part of the motivation to return to school.
Also, throughout the interviews, most of the respondents (n=19), expressed the
opinion that their own education had been a long-term goal. For some, it was a goal
whose pursuit was interrupted earlier in their lives by a number of factors, including
caregiving of family or extended family members (e.g., their parents, grandparents,
younger brothers, or younger sisters), employment, financial limitations, and/or child-
rearing responsibilities.
The process surrounding the decision to return to school, across the sample, was
of importance to the respondents. While each decision reflected consideration of family
needs and financial obligations, variation occurred among respondents with regard to a
negotiated decision between husband and wife or an individual choice.
The financial impact to the family economic status was a major consideration in
the decision to return to school. In some cases reentry meant lowered family income
levels if school would require mom to reduce her work hours or quit work altogether. In
all cases, it meant increased expenses, if not for tuition (which was sometimes subsidized
by employers), it certainly entailed additional costs for books, supplies, gasoline, and other
student related necessities. Each of these was factored in to the ultimate decision that
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would direct the choice of college, full or part-time status, and day, night or weekend
formats.
“We were taught to be achievers.”
All of the respondents indicated that there was a high value placed on education in
their families of origin. While some of them noted the occupational rewards of education
were mediated by racial discrimination (e.g., nursing and teaching were the two major
careers open to women of color), nevertheless, they reported that they were encouraged
to obtain as much education as was available.
Considering that all of these women did not come from middle-class backgrounds,
and considering the fact that they report they were aware of the limited range of available
careers, and the emphasis on the value of education that existed in their childhood homes,
one may infer a belief in educational attainment as a path to upward mobility, as suggested
by McAdoo (1988) in Chapter One. Reinforcing the belief of education as a means of
mobility, throughout the sample, there additionally seems to be a sense of personal dignity
and respect attached to individuals who have acquired extensive education which appears
to be embedded in the Black culture. The companion values to personal achievement of
commitment, honest work for honest pay, and perseverance appear as punctuation marks
throughout each student's story.
I sensed, across the sample, an enormous pride (though often purposely
understated and framed as only doing what was necessary) in a family heritage of
achievement and accomplishment in the face of tremendous obstacles, with few rewards.
One 49 year old respondent who is enrolled in a full-time weekday program, proudly told
about her family's educational tradition:
My grandmother graduated from college in 1913, which was unusual
for white women, let along a Black woman. My mother went to
Grambling University, in 1940 and was able to finish three years
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there. Then she met my father who had a 10th grade education. On
my mother's side of the family, there were all these educators. One
of my relatives was the first Black male to graduate from college in
that town at the time, which was after the Civil War. So, we have a
long tradition of education. As a matter of fact, most of my family
are educators.
Bringing me up to date on the family history, she added, "So, out of the seven of
us children, there will be counting myself, after I graduate, four of us who will have
finished college and another one who has a Ph.D."
Several of these respondents were at the "tail end" of the achievers in their families
which, as it was expressed, gave the impression that they felt the need to graduate not
only for their own purposes, but also not to be the only sibling left out of the family
pattern o f educational attainment.
Feminine wisdom, especially as it has been described by Collins (1989), was
exemplified by the mothers of many of these returning students. While some of the
subjects were required to be the support system for a sick or overworked mother, others
describe their mothers as being a role model of creativity and perseverance, often
performing at levels beyond their formal education. One respondent, speaking with pride
about her mother, who eventually wrote both a family and a community history,
remembered:
My mother never actually graduated from high school, but she was a
very smart woman. When you talk about education, my mom, she
probably taught us better than the teachers did. Because although
she didn't have a formal education, formal college education, she was
self-taught. Our house was like a library because my mother clipped
and kept everything. She used to archive our community.
The above respondent's mother as well as others in the sample were reported to be
deeply interested in the educational endeavors of their children. Not only was there a
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family emphasis on education, it seems that parental involvement in a child's education was
assumed, as students report of their family and extended family’ s support of school
performances, sporting events, fund-raisers as well as offering home support for
attendance, homework and good school behavior. One 47 year-old law school student,
raised in the south, recalls her educational experience:
It was something we did way back even on the farm. It was
something that your parents encouraged. They protected, they
provided for you and that kind of stuff, and I think during the time
we were growing up, most families encouraged education. That was
just a given, that was something you were supposed to do. And we
did. It was just another phase, an expected part of life for us. I liked
school and looking back I don't think I got a bad education, even in
our poor neighborhood school...I don't feel that I missed anything,
because our teachers, you know, there was a lot of love there. But,
they were about business too! They were really pushing. They didn't
play around. You were supposed to do what they told you to do and
you didn't make anything else about that. They would sit and call
your parents, and your parents were actively involved and were
involved with booster clubs and things like that. So, it was really like
a family kind of thing.
It has been noted that career choices were limited, and there appears to have been
a consensus about Black occupational prestige in those careers. To be a secretary or other
white collar office worker carried more prestige than being a teacher because it was harder
for an African-American woman to get a job as secretary than it was to get a job as a
teacher in a segregated school system. Education was seen as necessary for personal self
esteem and limited mobility, but the possibility of going into law or medical school was
not considered. This same respondent who now at age 47 is engaged in obtaining the law
degree which was unavailable to her as a young woman reflected on her choice of careers,
and says she recalled that her major interest in nursing was as a very little girl when she
remembered admiring the nurses because they wore "those amazing capes." She
continues to describe her experience as she chose a career, one which she pursued
earnestly, but without satisfaction:
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Still, we weren't given opportunities as it related to education, not to
the extent that maybe they were given here, and regards to
encouraging youngsters to making a choice about maybe a
profession. We were totally restricted. You knew you could be a
teacher, you could be a nurse, you can be those kind of things, but
law was never really talked about there. So, I selected something. I
decided to be a nurse, at least I would look great. And low and
behold I got to nursing school and decided this was NOT [her
emphasis] what I wanted to be. But, you know, I was raised that
once you start something you don't quit it, you don't falter in the
middle or stop in the middle. So all this time, I have been thinking
about the law. Thinking about it as something Td really like to do.
Six of the respondents noted that it was in their parents' generation that education
and achievement became a value. They saw their parents as setting new family
achievements in educational attainment. This may be reminiscent of the patterns of
mobility described by McAdoo (1988), wherein the subjects would be mobile into the
middle-class, whereas their parents would have lower educational and occupational
achievement than themselves. In a significant number of cases in my study (n=14), father’ s
educational attainment was less than mother’ s. One respondent who is in a part-time
program at a junior college relates:
My mom did finish high school. My dad didn't graduate from high
school, I don't know how far in school he went. And I don't recall
that any of the aunts had finished high school. But, my mom, was
the youngest and you know how when you grow up times change,
and I guess values change too, so she was a high school graduate.
This seems to be exemplary of the pattern of education becoming normative as a
gradual process. When respondents reminisced about their grandparents educational
achievements, they were spoken of as the forerunners, who were starting a family tradition
of education, but who were also seen as the exception, accomplishing something that for
an African-American in their time was extraordinary. This heritage has been supported by
the mobility and access to some societal rewards which a lack of education blocked.
Nevertheless, while education was seen as valuable, its ability to open all doors remained
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limited, since education and an occupation reflecting the level of education achieved was
not available. A 44 year-old respondent who has been engaged in part-time college
studies for the past ten years and hopes to finally graduate in the next year, describes her
family's emphasis on education in spite of the fact that neither of her parents were able to
obtain positions commensurate with their educations:
My father had two Master's and a Doctorate. My mother has a
Master's. I have a sister who's a Masters, another sister who's a B.A.
and another sister who's also a B.A., all in different fields. My father
got a doctorate, but was never able to get a job with that doctorate,
but he was Dr. , and that was the achievement. That was the
proudness for us that I didn't care if he never got a job, it was such
an honor to see my father achieve that goal. My mother now lives in
Texas and has a job being over a mental health institute. She started
late in life to get her degree. In fact, I believe she probably was my
age when she started getting her education.
This respondent also recalls the important part that education played in her young
years at home:
I was always taken to the library, whenever there was a project for
my parents to do with their educations. We were taught to be
achievers. I think that indoctrination started very young in our
family. When I was in 3rd grade, when everyone else was playing
out of doors in the summer, we had a chalkboard in our room with a
list of learning assignments to do for that day, plus our chores. And
we had to have that done.
She believes that her background, which involved her parents' adult educational
endeavors, has helped her and her family to adjust to school life as an integrated part of
their normal life patterns.
Someone has always gone to school in our family. So, that wasn't
new to my daughter when she saw me go to school and spend hours
there. And neither is it new to my grandsons. Because they have
great-grandparents and grandparents who went to school. So my
background has been of great assistance to me.
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Woven in and out of some of the stories, especially those who were in the lower
SES portion of the sample were statements reflecting cultural values, such as those
regarding education. Sometimes I was not sure if the statements were made for my
individual benefit, so that I would know she had been poor, but not "trashy" (as some
groups of people were referred to); or, if she was merely trying to point out examples of
racism embedded in white attitudes. Nevertheless, the value of education seemed to be an
important measuring device to indicate social status and respectability. This 45 year-old
student described the importance of schoolwork and grades even though they were poor,
as though I assumed poverty and minimal education were to be expected because she was
African-American:
I was raised in an educational atmosphere. I was not raised in the
inner-city which is generally what white-America thinks of all
African-Americans. I do not come from a background of a
dysfunctional family. I do not come from a background of drugs or
alcohol or any of those things. Yes, we were poor, nine children on
a Master Sergeant's salary is still poor, but we learned. We were
taught to strive to achieve the top. No matter what task we were
given, we should work to be the best. School was one of those tasks
and we were all expected to excel.
In this sample, in the reentry student's generation, education was the norm rather
than the exception. Thirteen of the respondents indicated that they had brothers and
sisters who had attended college. In some cases, the respondent had been significantly
involved in her siblings' college careers, either financially or in other ways. Some students
explained that they believed it was their responsibility, especially if they were the eldest, to
help the younger ones achieve.
From childhood, a theme of family support seems to be apparent, whether it was
formalized by articulation or emerged out of family norms. The acceptance of the
delaying of personal goals, in childhood and into young adulthood due to parents' health,
family relocation, divorce, employment obligations, parenting, etc., seems to have been
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imprinted early on, and appears as a voluntary commitment rather than a pressured
condition. This theme will be treated in depth in the next section.
The feeling that all the children in the family should have the opportunity to
achieve through education is paired with a sense of gratification that all the brothers and
sisters have achieved. Typical of these types of responses is from a forty-two year-old,
full-time student who said, "Out of eight kids, all are college educated, not without some
degree of sacrifice, but we are all making it. I'm just finishing later than them."
Another respondent shared a similar reflection, saying, "All of us are professionals,
except one, me. And I'm working on that. It wont be long now."
The inability to achieve the same personal goals as their brothers and sisters
created some discouragement and regret, and was expressed tearfully by one respondent,
when she said, "I'm the eldest of six children, and everyone else has graduated from
college except me. It appears that the achievement of acquiring college education as a
whole family's accomplishment may have been one of the motivators to return to school,
in spite of the difficulties involved.
"I always pictured myself as a college graduate.”
As personal histories unfolded, respondents were able to place their contemporary
educational endeavors in a context of goals and dreams from their pasts. Whether it was a
viable direction for these women in their young lives, a college education remained a long
term goal, and their stories tell of a variety of paths to their current enrollment in college.
From the point of view of one forty-eight year-old student, who is currently taking classes
part-time during the day, her personal goals had to be set aside as she assumed
responsibilities at home:
I'm doing this now because I never had the opportunity to do
anything for me because I was taking care of my brothers and sisters
and my mother. My father left and there were so many of us, Mom
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and five kids. Nobody seemed to want us. Everyone was afraid they
would get stuck with all these children. I was the oldest, and I had to
look out for my mom too, who was never the same again. She was
sick a lot. It was a lot of work for a long time.
She recalls that as conditions in her family became more taxing for her mother, that
she was at first drawn into a supporting position, merely attempting to lighten her mother's
load and help as she could. Over time, she became the responsible caretaker of the family,
as her mother's physical and mental health deteriorated. All of this began when she was
about eleven years old.
"I didn't get to socialize very much, so I grew up reading books. Books became
my friends," she reports. Her responsibilities grew and she gave up attempting to achieve
more than learning how to be a "mom" to her brothers and sisters.
"I had to fight her battles. I fought bill collectors. I fought my father. I went and
got money from him. I walked to where he was and when I came back we had groceries.
I was doing that at twelve or thirteen." She recalled one particular memory which
symbolized her isolation as well as her distance from her dreams to be like other young
women she knew. Her goal of college graduation seemed to be impossible, and she
realized that graduating from high school would be a challenge in her case.
We were all hungry. There was no money and not enough food for
all six of us. My mom and I were dishing up plates for the four little
kids. She didn't even offer me any. After they were all at the table,
me an mom went into the next room and sat and talked. I kept
looking over her shoulder, looking at them through the kitchen door,
watching them eat, you know? I remember then, like it was
yesterday, that she got up and very quietly walked to the door to the
kitchen where they were eating and slowly, gently, closed the door.
Then she came back, never said a word about it, picked up a book
and began reading. I'll never forget it. That's how it really happened,
but the funny thing is as I recall it (and I do often), the door keeps
getting louder and louder as it closes. Now when I recall it, that
door makes a noise like thunder! Only I'm the only one that has ever
heard the symbolic noise.
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Not all of the respondents had stories such as this one, however, many of them
stated that college had been a life-long dream that remained intact despite how far off it
may have seemed, and that they had just waited out the time until they could go to school.
One student, who has spent close to five years in part-time classes and is hopeful of
completing her degree in a full-time program in which she is currently enrolled, described
her situation;
I have always wanted a college education, always. I was unable to
do it when I was younger because I had a family very young. So,
next I was determined to support younger siblings in college and I
did that. Then I put my own children in college and now I'm finally
there too.
Likewise another respondent, who is enrolled as a junior in a full-time traditional
college setting, expressed similar feelings of the need to do something for herself;
I always have pictured myself as a college graduate, you know, even
when I was home minding a lot of little kids. I believed I was going
to be different. I feel good now because I'm finally getting to be who
I wanted to be. Someone who I believed I always was.
Some students have attempted to take a class from time to time as a way to keep
themselves stimulated and maintain study skills. For example, a forty-three year-old
respondent, attending night classes toward an AA degree, stated;
I am the one that didn't get a chance to finish. I was starting to feel
that I was losing too much. I always enjoyed school, I really did. It
was always exciting to me and even if it was just going back to take
one course, it was interesting and much more interesting than my
day-to-day hum drum life.
For the three respondents who were bom outside the United States and moved
here in their adolescence, educational careers were interrupted due to the move. New
expectations replaced old ones as life style, responsibilities and future plans adapted to a
new way of life. Nevertheless, the goals themselves remained in place, waiting once again
for the opportunity to appear. A respondent from Trinidad, who arrived here when she
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was seventeen years old, as a result o f her parents' divorce, describes her experience. It is
another example of the eldest daughter assuming co-responsibility with mother for the
care of the family.
So for many years she [mother] worked and we all helped. But,
I was the eldest and so I had the responsibility of helping everyone
else. Because my mother worked, she was gone from 8:00 in the
morning until 9:00 at night. I had to help everyone. I think it was a
little too much for me and I didn't have the training before. Where
we lived in Trinidad, it was very inexpensive to have maids, so we
always had two maids. My mother and father were always there and
it was a very very easy life for me before. And then to come and
have to see about making dinner and making sure the house was
clean and supervising everyone else. At least feeling like I had to
supervise everyone else. It was a lot for me to do, so my emphasis
wasn't so much on my own school. I took on the responsibility
without knowing it, because I felt that my mother of course needed
whatever help she could get. And then I got married to my husband.
Even when I got married, my mother continued to rely on me to
watch over my little brother. So now, that my own children don't
need me as much, I am going back to finish what I never started. I
feel good.
In many cases, these young women moved from their family homes taking with
them the ongoing sense of responsibility to younger brothers and sisters or aging relatives.
So, they not only had their own new marital and parenting obligations to maintain, but
also remained highly involved with their families of origin. A respondent describes her
own experiences as she juggled family crises and managed her own life as well:
And then when I was twenty-three, she [mother] got really really
sick and I had to take care of my sisters at that time and work my
own two jobs and I also had two of my own children by then. I had
to go back and forth to visit her, go to my other jobs, cook and
clean at home, take care of my babies and also try to help my
younger sisters survive this crisis in their lives as well. I look back at
it all now and am amazed at the stress and overwork I had.
There was no time to think about personal goals and the dream of becoming a
college graduate faded in the face of reality for many of these students. Even if there were
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no extraordinary events encountered, life itself seemed to catch hold of their young lives
and place new demands on them. Eight of the respondents stated they did not attend
college in their earlier years of life due to the fact that experiences were pulling them in
non-academic directions. Employment, marriage, and child-rearing frequently became the
sources of immediate focus. The re-kindled desire and/or ability to return to school was
something that was to be achieved in another phase of life, as reported by one forty-three
year-old weekend college student:
I think my passion to get where I am going is because they’ re [other
family members] all accomplished. But I know I have the ability and
I know that when I got married so young, that I just put everything
on hold, because I really had my life planned then. I planned that
when I was twenty-one, I was going to get married. And when I got
married, I was going to be a virgin. I had these plans for myself.
And I fulfilled them. I got married and had my children young so I
could grow up with them. I needed to get married and have my
children. That was what was important, that plan. Then all of a
sudden about five years ago, I said, 'What happened to your
education?'
Some of the women used the term, "the years just got away from me," to describe
their inability to get back to school. It wasn't perceived as not wanting to pursue their
personal goals, but just that there was so much that needed to be done before they could
begin, that "the years just got away." One forty-seven year-old mother of five, described
how the years got away from hen
I was always interested in social work. But I didn't have time to get
my degree. I started working. You know you start working when
you're eighteen to get some money. You start and you keep going
and you don't stop. Then I got married when I was twenty-one and
the babies started coming and they didn't stop. Now I have time to
be interested in social work again.
Some of the reentry students had not only gone into the work force, but had
become successful in their individual fields. However, even success in a career was not
enough to make up for what they believed was not only a lack of educational achievement,
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but a lack of personal achievement as well. One respondent, who holds a well-paid
management position, describes what she sees as the dilemma faced by some women who
achieve in the work world, but do not feel personally fulfilled:
I always felt incomplete and getting an education was something that
I needed to fulfill for me. What happens, I think with women who
end up somehow getting a quote professional unquote career prior to
getting the paper that goes with it, is that you economically are in a
bracket that you think, Well, I really don't have to do this because
I've somewhat achieved.' So maybe economically you have achieved,
but it's always something lacking, at least for me lacking internally. I
felt getting a degree was a goal that I had started out to accomplish
twenty-five years ago, that I just didn't complete and wasn't satisfied
with myself. It's about feeling good from the inside out.
Not all women in the sample had careers outside the home. Some had worked
throughout their married life because economics required it. Others had worked part-time
and still others had been able to make the choice to remain home to care for their children.
In any event, the commitment to their children was seen as their most basic and important
obligation. Motherhood was seen as one of the major contributors to delayed reentry and
was reported as a factor in the timing of education for the majority of the respondents.
Almost all women expressed a high value on their mothering responsibilities and felt it was
appropriate that their educations were postponed as a result of their high levels of
commitment to their children. Much of our conversations centered around anecdotes of
their children, outside the scope of the interview questions. It was one of the areas
wherein the reentry student and I could find our own common ground. Sharing stories
about our respective children, parenting adventures, and the unique pleasure/pain
relationship with adolescents all superimposed with a mom who is a student eased the
interview and maintained it at the "female-bonding" level for the most part.
Children and their attitudes toward their own and their mothers' education played a
part in the reentry student's experience. One weekend college mother of a high school
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student stated that her own desire to return to college was stimulated by her daughter’ s
educational goals:
When my daughter started going to high school, she was extremely
bright and I thought, I need the college experience, because she's
going to go there. She's going to be a doctor and I want to be able
to converse with her.
Other students weighed the amount of mothering which their children still
required, and used their children's level of self-reliance and competence as a measure of
whether "the time was right" for them to return to school. There were discussions of the
benefits and disadvantages of returning to school for the children, which invariably seemed
to end with a statement implying that it was better to wait than to risk causing difficulties
for their children. So, for the most part, these students waited. For example, one student
reported:
I stayed home from work after my children were bom and kind of
devoted my life to taking care of them. I always said I would go
back to school when my youngest daughter was of an age where I
knew she could take care of herself. And when she was about
fourteen, and I figured she can cook and do all the things for herselfj
that's when I started taking classes again.
The ability of children to maintain themselves, or the level of involvement
necessary to maintain structure and supervision in the home were important considerations
for all the women with children still living at home. The consideration of returning to
college only became a viable option after the process of assessing children’s needs and
capabilities had taken place. The demands of family responsibilities, especially mothering
obligations, were major decision variables across the sample. For example, another
mother, a single woman with a college-aged son, who works full-time during the day and
is in a full-time evening program, reflected the need, even with a college age, to feel that
her son was capable and responsible enough in life before she could comfortably return to
school:
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Now it’s pleasant at home. That was another reason that I
decided I could do this now. That also was considered. Because
my son...is mature now. I couldn’t have decided to go to school
four years ago, I wouldn’t have been able to consider doing
something like this.
"1 made the decision mvself."
It is an understatement to say that the decision to return to college was for most of
the sample a product of a variety of experiences. Regardless of the intensity of desire to
return to school, and after consideration of the impact on children, the reentry student had
to reflect upon the opinion of her husband about her decision. Each married woman had a
unique approach to the subject with her husband. It is important to remember that all the
respondents in this study were enrolled in school and had not successfully been either
cajoled, coerced or forbidden to return to school. Thus the respondents, in this study,
came from situations which had been conducive to college reentry.
In eleven cases reentry was a decision negotiated between husband and wife, based
on family income and mothering responsibilities. For example, one forty-four year-old
mother with a twelve year-old son still at home, had been out of the work force at her
husband's request. She described their negotiation process:
I said, Tm going back to work in the beginning of the year.1 He said,
'Can't you stay home another year, because my job requires so much
travel. I want you to be home with .' I started to cry and got all
upset because I was bored and I was miserable, and he said, Well,
you've always wanted to go back to school, why don't you? I'll pay
for it.' And I said, "Okay.' So, now I'm very happy that I was
afforded that opportunity.
Four of the eleven couples the negotiation process was rocky, due to conflicting
needs or desires, especially around finances. When one woman, who had worked as a
"temp," but actually put in close to forty hours per week, the decision to go to college in
either a weekend program or a traditional daily full-time was a difficult one. She preferred
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the traditional model and her husband wanted her to enter a weekend program. She
described some of the issues:
That was really a big decision, because what it meant was that I
wanted to do something, to come to school full-time during the day,
and not enroll in the weekend program as he wanted me to. It
caused conflict. But it wasn't conflict, adverse out loud conflict. It
was the kind of conflict where my husband was really tom. He
seemed to be able to accept the fact that I could go to weekend
college, so therefore I could work during the week. But the conflict
came when I said I really couldn't work because I wanted to go to a
weekday program and my school schedule would conflict with work
hours. So, it was okay to go to school as long as I didn't affect the
income to the home. It wasn't the school he cared about, the conflict
was around money.
She remained in the weekday program, despite his difficulty with it and reported
there was some tension remaining between them about it. Although she believed the
subject was closed to further discussion, and did not believe they were suffering major
financial losses due to her choice, his dissatisfaction would come to the surface on
occasion and they would argue. "He'll be okay when I graduate. Then I'll be back to
work and making more money than ever. (Big laugh)." Nevertheless, her school schedule
remained a “hot” topic that both she and her husband seemed to have consciously (if not
verbally) decided to keep at a distance. When it did become a topic of discussion, she
reported, it had been drawn into debate “through the back door,” by her husband as a
means of pointing out his compliant nature. This respondent wondered whether it was
the way she had seemingly ignored their discussion about her school schedule (weekday or
weekend) that was what kept this point of disagreement alive.
For five respondents, decisions about their education were personal and were not
necessarily made jointly with their spouses. One woman, aged 43, who withdrew from a
weekend college situation to enter a daily, full-time program stated, “It was a decision that
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I made. It wasn’t a decision that I made with my husband. I just decided that that’s what
I’m gonna do.” The motivations for decision-making styles varied.
Some respondents appear to have independently made the decision as a means of
avoiding a discussion about school which at a minimum level may have been unpleasant,
or in the extreme may have ended with necessary concessions which would have kept
them out of school. One student wanted to take a leave of absence from her job and
become a full-time week-day student, anticipated her husband’s disapproval. She stated
that, “Once it was a done deal, what could he say? I didn’t want him to tell me, ‘no.’”
She followed through on her plans, explaining:
I think I should have consulted him, but I didn’t. And this was a
big decision because I wouldn’t be able to work. What I did say
was, ‘I’m transferring schools.’ But I didn’t discuss it, see, or
say, ‘What do you think?’ I just did it.
This same feeling of needing to make the decision first and tell her husband about
it after the fact was repeated several times. There seemed to be a sense for women with
this point of view, that their husbands would go along with their choice once it was a
reality and to give their husbands the pre-emptive option of saying no before any action
was taken would mean the students might have to acquiesce to their husband’s wishes
about returning to school.
For example, another respondent who anticipated disagreement from her husband,
and so chose to make the decision on her own, reported:
It frustrated him that I made the decision to go back to school,
because he wasn’t a part of it. But I didn’t let him be a part of
it. ‘Cause I knew that if we had talked about it, I probably
would not have done it because there would have been all kinds
of arguments against it. So, I didn’t consult him. I’m kind of
stubborn in a way when I have a goal and I don’t want anybody
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to discourage me. I told him later I had a goal and there’s nothing or
anyone that’s going to stop me from accomplishing this goal.
There are numerable explanations that may account for this type of decision
making style. The most commonly expressed justification was that e T know how he is,”
or, “He’ll get over it.” One student explained, “Why should we have long hours of
discussion and then even longer hours of silence about something that I know I want to do
and am going to do and that he knows I want to do and am eventually going to do. I just
saved us some time!”
Salvador Minuchin (1967), a family therapist, suggested that African-American
males and females may tend to deal with family issues in an indirect manner, rather than
with direct confrontation. While this may indeed have been true for his population, one
cannot infer that this might be a cultural trait limited to African-American populations. In
my own experience as a family therapist, I have observed this decision style in a wide-
range of couples of varying ethnicities. If one might attempt to make a generalization
about this decision-making style, I might suggest that it is most likely to occur in partners
who have had a long-term relationship and who not only have a deep understanding of
their partner, but also hold a belief that their partner has the same understanding of
themselves. Thus, they can feel confident in predicting the long-term response to making
a choice with which their partner may initially disagree. It also seems to reflect a
confidence in the stability of a relationship that can withstand strong differences of
opinion, or one that will support the individuality of the partners.
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For one student there was no mental dilemma about whether or not her husband
would be supportive. She was a 47-year old professional, who had been in the workforce
herself for twenty years, when she decided to return to school in a weekend college
program. She had seen an advertisement in a newspaper and decided that a weekend
format would be the least disruptive to her work and family schedules. Examining the
prospect, she reported she knew her children were already used to her demanding work
schedule that often required travel and that weekend college wouldn’t therefore change
things too much. She explained, “I made the decision myself. It probably has to do with
my independence. I, in a sense, informed him [her husband] that this is what I was going
to do. And, everyone was pretty respective [sic.] to it, and excited about it.”
In some cases, spouses were not consulted because the decision to return was
made and acted upon spontaneously. As a 50-year old mother, who reported she had been
feeling quite discouraged about her life, explained:
One day I was sitting up crying because my youngest son had
dropped out of college, and my best friend said, ‘Well, you keep
bugging these kids about going to college, you’re the frustrated
student, why don’t you go to college?’ So, I went to my
neighborhood junior college that same day and started filling out
forms.
Sending the youngest child off to high school, seems to be a benchmark for most
mothers. It may be a time of reflection, regret or relief. In some cases, it is the first sense
of release from maternal responsibility. One respondent, who had recently sent her
youngest off to high school reported:
I woke up one morning and got the kids off to school. I had
a list of things that everybody need to have done and I was
the doer. So, I just decided I’m going to do something to
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make me happy as opposed to making everyone around me
happy. I called the junior college and found I could still enroll.
So, that day I signed up for my first class.
These returning students reflected a feeling of ‘Now there is time for me, as there
has never been before,’ and also a sense that they deserved this opportunity. This is
reflective ofMohney and Anderson’s (1988) list of motivational variables . When these
variables are combined with the diminishing barrier of parenting demands and the belief
that there will be a sufficient level of family and spousal support for their endeavors,
women seem to be empowered to pursue their own goals. Mohney and Anderson cite
only seven (18%) women who offered ‘lack of spouse/partner support” as a barrier to
entering school earlier on in their marriages. As an enabling factor supporting her choice
to return to school, the “support from partner” variable was cited by seventeen (45%)
women in the sample. This current research would seem to indicate that spousal support
is important from a relational viewpoint, but may not be the determining factor in goal
selection or pursuit.
One respondent, who did receive support from her husband about her goal of
college graduation, suggested that her perception of males may have played a part in her
choice to return to college at this particular time. Her statement offers some interesting
insights and is offered there as a possible are for future research. She is a 43 year-old
weekend college student, who is in a management position. She explained the feelings
that kept her out of college for so many years:
I came to California in 1972, and my husband said to me, ‘Well,
why don’t you not work and if you want you can go back to
school.’ I just felt somehow there was something real weird about
that, because I had worked all my life, even when I was 12 years
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old I sold Christmas cards. So I had always been pretty independent
and had some means of income. Because I never really saw other
males besides my uncles, I didn’t see males take care of their
families. I was afraid that he [my husband] probably would not
do that either, so I didn’t trust that. And I went to work as opposed
to taking him up on it and going to school. I guess now I have
taken him up on it these years later, but it was probably because now
I felt that it was a decision I could make and I could pay for it. You
know, that it was all okay when I was more in control. I was afraid
of being dependent that I would no longer be in control or I couldn’t
trust him to take care of whatever I thought my needs were.
Returning again to Mohney and Anderson’s study (1988), the “need to be
independent, to be able to care for oneself and children” variable was presented as a
motivator to return to school. In the case of this respondent, returning to school and thus
removing herself from the labor market, was perceived as making herself to financially
reliant on her husband. Her ability to pay for her own tuition and her choice of weekend
college which allowed here to maintain her employment were important factors which
allowed her to remain self-sufficient and self-reliant and still achieve her goals.
Once the decision had been made, either jointly or independently, to return to
school each student and her spouse had to deal with the financial implications of college
reentry.
“I had heard about student loans.”
Across the sample, the issue of family finances was noted as a concern with regard
to the decision to return to school. In some cases, the major concern would be the school
expenses themselves, in other cases the financial burden on the family became a
consideration if the respondent’s returning to school meant a decrease in income.
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Certainly, the financial aspect of returning to school had an impact on the choice of
program, e.g., full-time, part-time, day-time, evening or weekend program (referred to in
Table 2). Mom may have made the decision to return to school independently, but the
financial implications played a part in how and when she would accomplish her goals.
One full-time student describes the challenge of accessing funds to pay tuition:
Going to a four-year college is expensive. I had heard about
student loans, but didn’t know who to get one. I went to the
financial aid office and stood in line, but all they did was hand
me these forms and told me to follow the directions inside them.
I figured it out and that’s mostly what pays for school. If it
weren’t for financial aid, I couldn’t be in school. I’ll have a lot
to pay back but you can’t get a B.A. at a junior college.
The application process for obtaining financial aid was seen as a daunting but
necessary step for most respondents. Some relied on financial aid to a greater degree than
others and struggled as they entered the realm of federal loan agencies and the
accompanying obstacles experienced by women and felt especially keenly by women of
color. One respondent who is employed full-time and is now also a full-time student in a
day program described her own financial situation. Her adult daughter and two children
have recently returned home to live with her:
So, I think about the stress I feel and I think it really boils down
to economics. Out of all the different difficulties that students
have, including myself it boils down to economics. For me, I
take out a loan every year. Well now I know I’m going to have
to pay back. Of course I make too much other income now to get
financial assistance other than a loan. So, I’m going into debt at
this time of my life, but if I want to go to school, I have no choice.
While this student had learned how to negotiate her way through the lines and
paperwork necessary to obtain her financial aid, other students are challenged by a system
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that requires an entry level of initiative and expertise in order to open the financial doors
to institutions of education. A 49 year-old woman who had been out of the educational
system for thirty years told of her struggle to learn how to apply for grants, loans or
scholarships:
I didn’t know how to do financial aid forms or any of that pile
of forms you need to get financial assistance. I’ve taken care
of children and two husbands for my adult life. The whole
education system was a new world. I didn’t have the training
to be able to get what it takes to get an education. When I came
on campus there weren’t any support groups for old ladies like
me and of course, no one directs you.
This student reported that she did eventually “leam the ropes.” As she became
more comfortable on campus, she introduced herself to other reentry women, using what
she called her, “PTA skills,” and eventually achieved a small network of friends on campus
who had common interests. They meet at lunch time when possible and perform the
function of an informal support group for each other.
Other students, especially part-time students whose time on campus is usually
limited to class hours and who have little social contact obviously have a different reentry
experience. A part-time student, now a single mother, felt frustrated because she has been
unable to access financial assistance up to this point, and has so far not found anyone to
help her in the process:
Oh, you’re a single woman returning to education? Lot’s of
money out there for women returning to education, but I can’t
get anything, not even a scholarship, because I’m not carrying
twelve units. So, it becomes...you’re kind of caught between a
rock and a hard place.
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The same respondent expressed her concerns that for African-Americans in
general, finances were barriers to their ability to obtain an education:
The only way we can afford to go to school now is because of
low tuition and loans. That’s going up. We can barely afford
it now. So pretty much it will be for white men again. I don’t
know if my grandchildren will be able to go to four years of
college. I’m doing it. My daughter is trying to do it. So, for
those who are getting it now, I say it’s an advantage to us which
our children might not have the opportunity to have. But at least
if we have knowledge, we can give our children like knowledge.
This respondent, being a single mother, working full-time and attempting to
reenter college on a part-time basis reflected the most difficult life scenario possible. She
was experiencing an inability to find financial or social support at her college. As well, her
own life circumstances made it difficult to for her to pursue alternative plans. Her limited
resources made her somewhat atypical of the middle-class sample of this study. During
our conversation, I attempted to pursue her observations and concerns about education
becoming a white male environment. I suggested that perhaps acquiring education was
becoming more and more difficult for anyone without financial resources. We had a
somewhat lengthy, but inconclusive debate which ended with her maintaining her opinion
of the future of education for African-Americans.
For most of the respondents, college seemed to be an expectation they held for
their own children. This attitude may be based on the higher range of socioeconomic
status held by most of the respondents of this study. Most reentry students volunteered
that the greatest obstacle to the success of their children’s college careers depended on
individual levels of motivation and preserving. Some mothers (and fathers) complained
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that their children were “play babies” who didn’t like to study, while other reentry
mothers stated that they were back in school themselves so that they would have
something in common with their children. The differences in perceptions about college
accessibility between the lower income range reentry students and the higher income range
students again raises the question about whether social class may be a better predictor of
life style and life chances than ethnicity.
While all respondents were currently finding ways of meeting financial obligations
to maintain their family life style and stay in school, finances remain an important
consideration. In some cases, finances were seen by the respondents as the only obstacle
to staying in school. A full-time day program student explains:
All that would keep me from going to school now is if I don’t
have money. That’s the only thing, if I can’t pay the tuition.
But I have a good plan in my mind too. I had a job that I enjoyed
and paid me well, and I can go back ad do it in the summer if I
want to. I asked my husband, ‘Are you sure you are going to
be able to pay for this, because if not, I’m going to start sending
out my resume and going to work in the summer and make my
tuition.’ He said, ‘Noooo, I don’t want you to do that.’ So, I
said, ‘Okay, I’m just giving you warning.’
When tuition and other school expenses were not available, students reported that
while they were challenged to be flexible in the timing, location and pace of their college
careers, that they, nevertheless, kept their goals in tact. One respondent, reported that her
husband was adamant that her returning to school wouldn’t put them into debt. She
states:
I decided to get as many classes at a j.c. as I could because it’s
so much cheaper. Next year I’ll have to transfer and that will
be a problem. Maybe I’ll take a year off to work and save or,
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maybe [laughs] I’ll talk my husband into something. I’m
working part-time now and I keep thinking I’ll try to stick a
little of that away.
Because the reentry student’s personal goals of education usually required the
redistribution of family funds, and in some cases actually decreased family income if her
employment status changed, finances emerged as the major area of discord for student
couples. In the general population, financial strain has been found to be one of the
greatest stressors a marriage can experience (Broderick, 1988) Aside from whatever
couple disagreements about financial strains were reported, the students themselves
expressed conflicted feelings about being in school and not contributing financially to the
family. One part-time student in a traditional day program explains her dilemma along
with a rather grim smile:
I did try to work part-time. I had all my classes in the morning,
so I could work after 12:00. And I did that as long as my
schedule could do it that way. But, this semester, that has
changed and my classes have to be throughout the day. So,
now I’m unemployed.
Some respondents, whose families needed their financial contribution and were
therefore required to squeeze school into their “free time,” were happy to find alternative
programs to the traditional model. One student, who opted for weekend college reported,
“I couldn’t have afforded to quit my job. I couldn’t have removed myself from the job
market. That’s why weekend college was so appealing to me.”
For women in the position of needing to work full-time and wanting to pursue a
degree, non-traditional programs have been beneficial. Evening classes were the only
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solution to this dilemma for a long period of time. However, evening classes have several
drawbacks which are especially difficult for women who have family responsibilities such
as meal preparation, homework supervision and other mothering obligations. In addition
to the renegotiation between spouses of evening responsibilities, attending classes after a
full day of employment can an exhausting experience, with little opportunity for
interaction with faculty or other students.
Weekend college, however, has much to offer. Students report that their daytime
absences on spaced Saturdays and Sundays are easier on all family members. It is easier
to involve friends or relatives, if occasionally needed, for child care or child activities
which require transportation or supervision during the day. Regular weekly family
routines do not have to be impacted and life styles seem to remain relatively intact.
Further, classes are held during daytime hours, over a two-day period, facilitating
productive study and learning times as well as opportunities for student interaction. For
another weekend college student, the greatest advantage was that she could keep her job
and go to school. She remarked, “Weekend college has been terrific for me. It’s a tough
way to go to school, but I have the opportunity to work five days a week. That’s crucial.”
The ability to maintain the pre-college level of employment and financial
contribution the family was important in receiving spousal support for school. It was
apparent that spouses’ support for their wives’ education was complicated by financial
strains. One respondent, who made a transition from weekend college to a traditional
day-time model and subsequently had to change her employment pattern reported:
He was really supportive of me while I was going to weekend
college. He would offer to fix dinner or take me out on
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Saturday nights to give me a break. All that changed when I
decided to go to day school. Now he says we can’t afford to
eat out anymore.
Over the course of the interviews it became apparent that the respective financial
contributions o f each partner were defined as much more than the actual dollar amount
that was brought into the family. Financial contributions were a part of the family
exchange system which defined other aspects as well as dollar amounts. Hochschild
(1989) has used the term “the economy of gratitude” to explain the individual values and
attitudes of toward personal sacrifices, perks, contributions or negotiations between
partners. She stated, “How a person wants to identify himself or herself influences what,
in the back and forth of a marriage, will seem like a gift and what will not” (p. 18).
Meanings attached to gender assigned tasks or obligations, personal attitudes about self
and even the meaning of marital commitment may all have some bearing on what one
partner or the other can accept or give gratefully. Additionally, it is interesting to note
that family research indicates that in most marriages across the general population each
spouse believes they have done much more taskwise in maintaining the household than
their partner acknowledges (Berk and Shih, 1980).
In this sample there was a sense that financial contributions by each partner
indicated teamwork and equal responsibility for the marital enterprise. So for these
women, their educational goals seemed to be reflecting personal needs to acquire a
degree, since most respondents did not indicate that they were returning to school in order
to advance their careers or enter a new job market. Reentry goals were individual ones
that wives brought into their marriages and not goals that had been designed as part of a
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marital partnership. So, finances provided an arena for the playing out of several layers of
relationship issues as well as the very real issues of family financial stability and security.
Some students suggested that even if husbands protested about changes in scheduling,
housekeeping quality, assignment of chores, or preoccupied spouses, the real issue was
money. One full-time day program student describes her husband’s feelings:
His problem is money. If I was coming to school and I was working
too and bringing in whatever, $40,000 or so, even if I was in school
ALL THE TIME, there’d be no problem. But money is our problem
right now. He would rather I was working 9 to 5 and bringing in a
salary. “Couldn’t you be happy like that?’ he asks.
Thus school, per se, is not seen as the villain, according to the respondents. If it
was not impacting the family budget, there would be no quarrel with the strains that
returning to school put on other areas of the family or marital relationship. Some
respondents, in discussing spousal disagreements over finances, saw that money and
conflict were directly related in their marriages. School was only the subject area wherein
the battles took place, the argument could really be about other issues. A weekend
college student with only one semester remaining until graduation, whose husband has
generally been supportive of her return to school, although he sees it as unnecessary
luxury on her part explained:
I think our conflict does not just come from the fact that I’m in
school, and I’m convinced of that. It’s a lot to do with the fact
that he seems to always be putting out money for some school
expense and it’s just not something he really wants. He would do
it, but he gets tired of it. He doesn’t see my school benefiting him.
There was an obvious attempt to understand their husbands’ frustration with the
additional financial stress brought on by the return to school. Although the respondents
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were generous in their understanding of their spouses dilemmas about offering support in
spite of their disapproval, no one suggested that she would quit school to ease her
husband’s anxieties. They acknowledged how difficult the situation was for their
husbands and explained how they might perceive the situation, but did not foresee
themselves dropping out of school to resolve the discomfort. At the same time, there was
an underlying tone that suggested that if their husbands were interested in pursuing a
personal goal or returning to college, they would be supportive of his decision. A 44 year-
old woman, in her second marriage, who was enrolled in two day classes at a local
community college, saw her return to college, even on a part-time basis, as an increased
financial burden for her husband:
His whole life plan changed because of me. He has had to
be under a lot of debt. Money had a lot of meaning to him.
He had to pay all my past debts when we got married. He’s
been putting out money, that’s how he sees it. Actually, we’re
a family, he took on my responsibilities when he married me.
I used to try and show him that you can’t live in terms of ‘you
have to do this, or you can’t do this’ because if the tables were
turned I would do it gracefully and help because I know we’re a
team.
Another respondent put the entire dilemma very succinctly. She said, “It used to
be I was always putting in. I always contributed to the finances of our home. I did two
part-time jobs. Now I’m not. I’m only doing for me.”
This notion of “only doing for me,” carries with it tremendous amounts of meaning
that may imply entitlement, guilt, withdrawal from teamwork, a need of commitment from
one’s partner, selfishness, or lack of understanding by one’s partner to name a few
alternatives. This restates the personal conflict that women may experience when they
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choose to pursue their own individual goals at someone else’s emotional or financial
expense. Throughout the interviews a concern was expressed again and again that
returning to school would intrude into their families’ routines and become a disruptive
influence. They regarded maintaining the ongoing family lifestyle as one of the major
challenges of reentry; and, financial strain, therefore, would be an area that exemplified
this issue, especially if a spouse did not believe that returning to college was in their
original marital contract.
A woman recently changed from a weekend college student to a full-time day
student reflected her husband’s feeling that she had somehow changed their marriage
contract when she decided to go back to college:
The problem for him so much is the finances. I think it’s the
thing where he feels that when we got married, I was working,
and now all of a sudden I’m going to school full-time. He
thinks it was all planned. That I didn’t tell him my plans before
and I sort of misled him. I’m sort of using him financially to
get my way. That’s what he thinks.
For the students whose employment situations remained stable and who in addition
received tuition remission from their employers for each class, one area of potential strain
was eliminated. However, finance is not the only area of family life which is impacted
when wife or mother becomes a college student.
Growing up in families that valued education, these women developed aspirations
toward college as children. Nevertheless, assumed responsibilities of caregiving for their
siblings and in some cases their parents. Early employment offiered financial support to
their families and a degree of independence for themselves which often led to marriage and
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then the further responsibilities of motherhood. The respondents reported that they had
been (and continued to be) good daughters, good wives and good mothers and believed
that now the time to pursue their own educational goals had arrived.
Making the decision to return to school, although perhaps a long and complex
process, was only the beginning step. Taking on additional goals, obligations and
interests, the reentry students were challenged to maintain the status quo at home. Most
of the respondents stated that a portion of their sense of success as a student depended on
their continued ability to maintain family expectations.
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Chapter Four
JUGGLING; NEGOTIATING SCHOOL AND FAMILY LIFE
Issues surrounding life style, i.e., quality of life, marital satisfaction, and family
relationships, were critical focal points in the majority of these respondents' descriptions of
their college experience. In fact, overall, more discussion was given to their family
involvement with regard to their education than was given to any discussion regarding
actual coursework or campus experiences. Thus, coping mechanisms to deal with
increased demands on time, social schedules and family obligations became important
realities of daily life. The success or failure of personal and/or family adjustments was a
factor in the levels of guilt experienced by the returning students. Family responses to the
respondents’ college career were crucial to levels of personal well-being. This finding is
reflective of earlier research. For example Roehl & Okun’s study (1984) of mostly white
middle-class women found that family support (or the lack of it) was crucial in explaining
depressive symptoms in reentry students.
Additionally, the respondents noted that they were aware of personal changes in
their behaviors and attitudes which had developed over the course of their ongoing
education. It was common to hear statements reflecting improvement in self-confidence,
problem-solving, and self-esteem, along with reflections on their perceptions, place and
power in the world and in our own society.
Keeping things at home the same and earnestly pursuing change in themselves
required a juggler’s talent to metaphorically balance a ball on the nose, keep a half a dozen
oranges in the air and ride a bicycle on a tightrope twenty feet in the air, all at the same
time. Coping mechanisms were essential to deal with study time, household
responsibilities, guilt, spouses, and children.
Personal changes in self-concepts and abilities as well as knowledge were noted
as unanticipated rewards of their college experience. With their increased understanding,
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students expressed personal observations about the ethnic/gender social structure of the
academic environment as they experienced it, regretting that structural inequality remains.
“Generally, I study when evervbodv*s asleep”
Across the sample there was a wide variety of life styles which developed as a
result of wife or mother returning to school. Major adjustments were experienced by the
student herself as she attempted to add her new responsibilities to her usual routine
without disrupting other family patterns. Finding adequate time for schoolwork and study
was a constant concern for most of the respondents. Students reported that “on paper” it
appeared there should be sufficient time for reading and study, “real time” did not allow
for it. Interruptions for things such as telephone calls, child transportation needs, or
family “business” fragmented most time at home. In addition, for some students a high
level of family activity that included TV, stereos, family “traffic,” visiting friends, or sibling
interactions combined to make study relatively impossible during non-working hours.
Juggling study time with family relationships gets to be complicated sometimes and
respondents generally agreed that they focused on identifying coping mechanisms to deal
with family needs. For example, one student describes how she copes with this:
My biggest challenge is finding study time. When I worked, I
never looked for a career that would make me have to come
home and do work at home or go away from my family. They
always had priority. So, I had sort of put limits on myself. Now,
I have to do work at night, in order to keep up I do have to study,
and I can’t watch TV. Now my husband...sometimes I get a little
annoyed, but he calls me to share things with him on TV or he’s
seeing something and he wants me to sit there and I want to tell
him, ‘I want to go and do my work and get it over with,’ but sort
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of compromise instead and look at the TV, but my mind is not really
there. I guess we’ve been married so long that I know what is
important. So, if I can sit there through a half an hour show, then
get an hour and a half for myself, I’ll sit there for half an hour.
Even if I don’t want to see the show.
When women know they cannot depend on early evening hours for uninterrupted
study time, some students report that they merely assume they will study late at night, or
alternatively, develop their own study opportunities by creatively using small chunks of
time. One student found for her schedule, it really was easier to simply wait to study until
everyone had gone to bed, and then she didn’t take away from anyone’s family time:
I don’t find it easy at all to study at home. In the evenings
everybody seems to need something from me. So, generally,
I study when everybody’s asleep. I study till 2 or 3 o’clock
in the morning, depending on what subject or whether I have
a final or something. I might stay up all night. Sometimes I’ve
gone two or three days without sleep, or with just an hour or
two of sleep.
For those students who were unable to regularly sacrifice their sleeping time,
finding small bits of time for studying seems to be a good coping mechanism:
The kids have choir practice sometimes on Sunday afternoons.
I can read while they practice. Whenever I can I squeeze in my
reading. I take my books with me wherever I go. Sometimes I
am waiting in the car fro one of them to run an errand or have
soccer practice. That’s all study time to me now. I never thought
I’d get to like chauffeuring these kids all over, but now I have a
reason. It gets me out of the house and into my books.
Because study time does not happen all at one sitting, to help provide structure,
some students set daily goals about study time. In one case, a student reported she had a
daily three-hour study quota that she assigned to herself:
I try to study three hours a day. I made a deal with me that
I would try to do that. If I have an exam or a paper due or
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just reading, I still try to maintain that minimum. I get in an
hour at lunch. I take my brown bag and sometimes just sit
in my car and study. If I can, I try to get in an hour in the
evenings. I like my reading, so I do it then, or sometimes
very early in the morning so I can retain it better. Then at
lunch, I can review my notes. On the weekends, if I can, I
try to do the same thing.
Sometimes redesigning daily schedules helped maximize time for returning
students. One woman, working full-time and enrolled in a weekend college program
described her system:
I never took any lunch to work before because I don’t do
much lunch, but now I do take my lunch break, so to speak,
and I study for that hour each day. Also, I wake up in the
morning an hour earlier. I used to always wake up at 6:00 A.M.,
but I would just kind of linger and stay in bed there until 7:00.
Now I get up at 5:45 and study from 6:00 until 7:00 or 7:15,
instead of reading the paper.
What became apparent, as students described how they interwove college into
their pre-college schedules, was that the time which was manipulated, redesigned or
reprioritized was the time they ordinarily had in their control. Overall, most students did
not request “time-off” from their accustomed routines, except during exam times or when
term projects were due. One student found that her new time demands allowed her to re
frame an unpleasant duty into a productive one. This weekend college student whose job
requires that she travels quite often, has learned to take advantage of that time:
The plane rides I used to just hate, now I look forward to them.
When I have to go once a week to northern California, I have
the thirty minutes that I’m waiting to board and the hour I have
on the plane. That’s a whole hour and a half of good study time.
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Because most of the respondents were employed, their jobs were also part of the
system that had to be reconfigured. In most cases, when no changes in employment status
was required, the students reported that their employers were pleased they were returning
to college and were generally supportive. For example, one student relates her experience
around getting a recent term paper completed:
One time this past semester, I actually had to work on my paper
at work. I mostly did it during lunch breaks. My boss knew
about it and was really nice. I had a fifty-two page paper and I
just pieced it and pieced it, and pieced it just in time to turn it in.
I got a B on it. I should have gotten an A. I had five points
taken off for the typing job [laughs].
Sometimes priorities would shift and students would find they needed to take time
off from work. For some students mid-term and final exam times were very trying
because there was no spot to study at home or little opportunity to leave the house and go
to the library. Taking a day off from work seemed to be one response to this need.
Another weekend college student explained:
I took off last Friday from work because I had so much vacation
time. They always threaten that they’re going to take it back if
I don’t take it. So I took off Friday to kind of review notes and
to be fresh and try not to be panicked.
Even in accommodating school demands by taking time from work, the women
again were rescheduling their own time, not the family’s. Across the sample there was an
articulated hesitancy by the students to inconvenience their families. Class schedules and
study schedules were designed to facilitate the addition of more obligations for the
respondents in a way that would leave other family patterns intact. One woman who takes
both day and night classes stated:
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I have really tried to schedule our lives so that my school doesn’t
become a problem to anybody. I try not to have homework on
the weekends and I try to be available so that I don’t disrupt their
lives at all. I have all my classes to accommodate their schedules.
Even mothers who are not working outside the home while they go to college
express their desire to minimize disruption of family routines. One way they can do this is
by having all channeling all their own school responsibilities into the same school schedule
as their children, whenever possible. A full-time, day student and mother who quit her job
to return to college describes her schedule:
I come to school very early in the mornings. I take him to school
at 7:30 A.M., and I do it just like I’m working. So, I just pretend
I’m working and get ready with them and I get to work...I get to
school just before 8:00. My classes don’t start until 9:40. I use
all the hours between, before and after for study. On some days
I don’t pick him up from school until 5:00, after his practice. So,
that’s really giving me a full day on campus. I do all my school
work. I try to do all of it. If I do have to do it in the evening, I
make a point of doing it with him and say something like, ‘Let’s
go do our homework.’
Finding study time that did not detract from family time, was one area that all
respondents found to be a challenge. Some students reported that they had no other
choice but to use time that had previously been used for couple or family leisure activities.
This style, requiring accommodation on the part of both friends and families, seemed to
work as long as students were able to be flexible about making exceptions to their study
schedules, when families or friends requested it. Nevertheless, cutting down on social life
was another way respondents reported they maximized the time needed for their added
responsibilities. A single mother who works full-time and goes to school part-time
describes her social life:
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I kind of blank out all Saturdays and Sundays. I don’t have time
to do any extra activities. As far as socializing with friends, my
friends know they come last. In fact, this year I hadn’t seen my
friends all year until Memorial Day, but I call them and they call
me. Sometimes they are a little selfish and sometimes they just
tease me about being a professional student.
Other students report they have found more informal and less time consuming
ways to enjoy leisure. They have limited themselves to events that require little
preparation and are relatively non-time intensive. One student stated, “We don’t do
anything anymore if it means I have to spend a day shopping for a new dress or a day in
the beauty shop. The parties that I like now, are two-hour barbecues where I can be
casual and get home without wearing myself out.” Another respondent, a 43 year-old
woman who has attended weekend college for two years has also reduced her social
schedule:
It’s just finding time to study. And I can’t...I don’t go out to
dinner a lot. I never was big on going out to dinner much, so
I haven’t really missed that. But I used to like to go to the
movies every now and then. I haven’t been to the movies since
I ‘ve been in school. The kids may rent a tape and then I sit and
watch for awhile, but that’s about the closest I get to the movies.
One student who shares her home with her daughter and grandchildren has tried to
incorporate family time and study time together, as well as providing a ‘learning time” for
her grandchildren:
The scheduling with my family...I pretty much...it’s just my
daughter and I and my grandkids. And what I do is, I kind of
try to do good quality time with my grandchildren. That includes
taking them to the library and keeping them there with me for
four to five hours, and then treating them afterwards.
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Along with finances and study time, the next area of greatest tension and therefore
great amounts of concern was the area of household chores. Dealing with the nuts and
bolts o f keeping the house livable was met with varying responses from each of the
respondents. In some cases, housework became an arena for tensions to be experienced
and addressed, much as finances was in other families. Because this area was seen by
almost all respondents as potentially volatile, most made conscious efforts to avoid
conflict. Sometimes both formal and informal means of renegotiating cooking and
cleaning plans took place. For other students, the best option was to attempt to
reschedule their duties into new patterns and ways of doing things.
“Get the laundry folded and keep the kitchen clean”
Across the sample, the question of how to get the dishwashing, laundry, cooking
and cleaning done were topics that received conscious consideration by reentry students.
How well the household functioned and how thoroughly the chores were maintained
seemed to be a measuring device for how well the respondents were integrating their
school life into their family life, with minimum impact on family members. Societal norms
that stress that a neat and clean home is representative of a good wife and mother placed
additional strains on the students to perform in this area.
If students were, as they reported, using their own home time to incorporate
necessary study hours into their schedules, then logically, something must be sacrificed.
Finding time to vacuum, clean bathrooms, cook meals, wash clothes, etc. required
creativity re-adjustment, negotiation or household help. There was a variety of responses
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by both respondent and spouse to this challenge. One student resolved her limited
opportunity to vacuum and clean the bathroom by hiring a cleaning person:
I told him [my husband] what it was going to be like. I told him
this was going to be very demanding for me and it would require
a lot of time and that there would be some things that we were
going to have to start doing differently. It was okay in the
beginning and he felt okay about doing things like dishes and
laundry, for awhile. But later, it got bad when his work schedule
changed. I couldn’t keep things up. Since I’ve hired a lady to
come and clean-up once a week, that’s helped.
This couple was fortunate that they could agree on a resolution and that there were
financial resources available to support outside help. Even when household help is
available, concerns about family perceptions of efficiency remain important. Some
students reported that when they sensed disapproval from their families about a decrease
in the “quality of care to which they had become accustomed,” they experienced guilt and
self-recrimination. One respondent explained that she tries hard to keep the household
operating as it always had:
I am very conscious of trying really hard not to make their lives
difficult. For example, the person who cleans our house didn’t
come on Tuesday, and my husband opened up his hamper and he
was sort of talking to himself, sort of frustrated, and said something
about his underwear and socks and I didn’t respond at this point.
Because, I wanted to see if he really was getting low on clothes.
Well, last night I didn’t say anything to him, but I did take his
clothes and put them to wash. This morning I got up ten minutes
early and folded all the clothes and put them in his drawer. So, I
think I am the one that makes sure that there is not a conflict. I
don’t want to become miserable in school and feel guilty.
For women who had been or were still employed full-time and had already learned
how to squeeze household duties into a busy schedule, the transition to school was less
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stressful. Some students, who were no longer working full-time used their working-
woman skills to meet family needs. For example, one respondent who had quit work to
return to school described her re-adjusted schedule that allowed her to go back to the way
she operated her household when she was a full-time employee:
I get up every morning about an hour before everyone else and
make sure the lunches are made and the kitchen is clean and the
household chores I have to do are getting done before everybody’s
up. This I did when I worked too. So, it’s just sort of going back
to my old work schedule and it doesn’t seem too traumatic to me
because I like to work and now I’m really enjoying something.
In spite of some students’ best efforts and their good intentions, housework often
was reported to have taken on secondary importance. Although no student suggested that
she had allowed her home to deteriorate, some respondents stated that they were not as
focused on details as they were before they reentered school. In some cases, there was a
belief that spouses’ perceptions of their interest in school meant that they were no longer
interested in the home. Students who experienced this were of the opinion that their
husbands were “picking on the housework” because they were afraid to come right out
and say that they resented their wives in college, or resented that their wives were
enjoying themselves so much being college students when as husbands they were required
to maintain the drudgery of going to work every day Thus lack of involvement in
housework seemed to have become symbolic of the student’s preoccupation with things
outside her family and her husband was responding to this perceived abandonment. A
respondent in a full-time traditional program discussed this situation in her home:
We talked the other night and he tells me the housework seems
to be piling up, whatever that means. I don’t see how me being
gone during the day has increased the amount of dirty clothes or
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dirty dishes that are sitting around when I get home, but all of a
sudden it’s become so important. I walk in the door and start
cooking dinner and he asks, ‘How come the dishes aren’t washed?’
Another student, in a daytime traditional program describes her experience, what
she believes are her husband’s perceptions and offers her own opinions, but not solutions:
The house is NOT dirty, my house is not. But there may be
dishes in the sink like that, a towel hanging here and a towel
hanging in the bathroom, you know. ‘Why is this like this?’
he wants to know. His attitude is ‘I’m not in schooL.so why
should I have to make adjustment in my life?’ I think it’s
because school is my thing. Then he thinks my daughter should
be more help, but she doesn’t really have the time to do a lot.
I also am particular about putting a high priority on homework
and she has a lot of work. She stays up later than I am studying,
so I come to her defense more when he says, ‘Why doesn’t she
wash the dishes? Why do you have to do everything?’ I’ll say,
‘Well, she’s studying.’ Then he says, ‘Well, she has to do
something, you know she can’t be studying all the time.’ And I
agree with him, but, I think that those things I should be doing,
not her. That’s a conflict.
These personal and interpersonal conflicts and responses may be representative of
the reentry experience. Hooper’s (1979) study of twenty-four returning women (ethnicity
not identified) and Parelman’s earlier 1974 study of ten returning women (ethnicity not
identified) suggested that for the mother who is coming back to college and emerging
homemaking career for the first time, her sense of guilt and need to accommodate her
family may be greater than women who have been in the workforce. The ambivalent
feelings of the respondents is also supported by Joy Rice (1982) who purports that women
are reluctant to ask for increased household help from their husbands or their children,
believing they are somehow failing if they cannot maintain what they perceive to be their
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responsibilities. Rice offers this as the explanation for the little change in the actual
division of labor that seems to occur when women return to college.
Some women did not report any conflict around household chores, but as
exemplified by one respondent, there was discomfort with the difficulty she experienced in
attempting to fulfill what she saw as her household obligations:
My daughter helps me in terms of my work in school. But as far
as housework, that gets neglected. So there are times when
housework... really... that’s low on the totem pole, and I feel bad
about that, because the family shouldn’t have to suffer. Well, they
don’t really suffer, but things aren’t like they used to be. My
husband didn’t bargain for this. He doesn’t expect dinner
necessarily to be on the table when he gets home, he’ll even cook,
but he still wants his life to go on. I feel bad sometimes because
I think that we are married and there are certain rules, that’s what
I feel, in a household.
Thus it appears that even if there is no conflict or no overt accusations about
diminished quality of housekeeping, women report levels of guilt when they are unable to
meet the standards of homemaking they have established for themselves.
Mealtimes can pose an impressive challenge for returning students whose work
and classtime schedules intersect too closely. Guilt about the quality of meals, the ability
or inability to serve them “on time,” or the necessity of asking other members of the family
to prepare or serve them can become an additional source of strain. Coping mechanisms
of all forms, from buying more frozen or pre-prepared foods, to eating out more often, to
having marathon meal preparation afternoons were described by the respondents. Several
students reported that they saved daily cooking time by preparing clusters of meals in
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advance on the weekends, and freezing them, so their weekday afternoons and evenings
would be less hectic. One respondent described her particular system:
I always make Sunday dinner. So, while I’m cooking the roast or
chicken or whatever, I always think of what I’m going to have
later in the week and make spaghetti sauce, or put together a
casseroie or something. I try to make about three meat dishes on
Sunday, that can cook along with the Sunday dinner meat. Then
meals for the rest of the week are easy to finish putting together.
Even my husband can heat a casserole.
Another response to the cooking dilemma that worked for some students was to
altogether reduce the number of meals they prepared. This was a reasonable choice if
there were only a spouse or older children in the home. A respondent who lives only with
her college age son described her cooking plan:
I don’t cook dinner that much anymore. Again, coming from the
south, the way I was raised was that you cook three meals a day,
and you have a responsibility to do that. All that has gone by the
wayside. I don’t cook during the week. I just don’t do that
anymore. On the weekend I will probably cook enough food to
have maybe three or four meals. And I buy frozen things that my
son can put in the microwave or simple things he can fix for
himself. I keep enough food in the house so he won’t go hungry
and we do have those three or four meals that I fixed on Sunday.
Making older children responsible for their own meals resolved mealtime problems
for some women. Based on family traditions and mothering routines that become
lifestyles, shifting cooking responsibilities was more difficult for some students than
others. One single mother reported that she experienced tremendous amounts of guilt
over her inability to prepare and serve hot breakfasts as well as hot suppers to her college
aged son. She finally became so frustrated with her son’s lack of approval with the meals
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that she did cook that she resolved the dilemma by telling him that he must be more
responsible for his own eating:
e If you don’t want what I cook,’ I said, ‘there are other things here.
If you want something, fix it!’ I usually cook at least one meal a
week and I’ll do that on Sunday. If he likes it, he can eat it, if he
doesn’t, he can fix something else. I’m not in charge of his stomach
anymore.
Beyond cooking, cleaning, limiting social occasions and restructuring daytime
schedules, some students found other ways of saving time and maximizing efficiency. One
woman, in a full-time night program who also maintained a full-time day job, changed her
hair style in attempt to eliminate all the “fussing” she normally had to do and simplify her
evenings:
I had my hair braided until a week ago. It was one of the
experiments I was going through to try to cope with this school
thing. I don’t know if you know anything about black hair, but
it’s really, for black women, a real problem. Because, I have to
roll my hair every night. If I don’t roll my hair, then it looks like
[makes a face] this...okay? I needed something that will get me
some relief. So that I can leave class four nights a week and not
have to roll my hair. Well, I got my hair braided.
Other women got short hair cuts, redesigned their wardrobes into clothes that
required less dry-cleaning or ironing, reduced the amount of make-up they ordinarily
wore, or gave up leisurely baths for quick morning showers. Each woman had found her
own specific ways of streamlining her personal needs to achieve the most efficient lifestyle.
Across the sample, students reported that they were as creative as possible in
finding ways to blend school and family so that it would be a positive experience for
everyone. If, the respondents explained, their families could thrive while they were able to
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achieve their educational goals, then they could consider the venture a success. However,
there was always the potential for disaster, the occasional disappointment or the
anticipated disapproval of spouse or children that would feed feelings of guilt.
“I keen telling myself that what Fm doing is more important than cooking
breakfast”
Across the sample, the returning students reported that they had dealt with feelings
of guilt. While most had experienced guilty feelings, they responded to it in various ways.
Some of them had reconciled the issue by justifying their decision to return to school.
They pointed out advantages the family would receive based on the completion of her
education. These advantages might include the concrete reward of more income, or a less
tangible benefit of having a happier, more content wife and mother, a more interesting
person, or a more fulfilled life. Others attempted to guarantee that any guilt feelings
would stay minimal by making sure the family did not feel that returning to school had
decreased their quality of life. By maintaining a pre-college life style for the family,
respondents believed husbands or children would have nothing to complain about, and the
student could therefore feel confident that no one was being inconvenienced except for
herself. For some students, guilt was a recurring feeling that might be brought on a
number of unexpected situations. When this happened they would resort to using
whatever logic or intervention would resolve the immediate situation.
Some respondents suggested that their families were aware how important
returning to college was for them, and so they “didn’t lay on any guilt trips.” One
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respondent, who is in a weekend college program, prepared her children as a way of
helping them to understand their mother’s undertaking:
I don’t feel guilty. Maybe one of the reasons I don’t feel
guilty is that they offered a study skills course a week before
school started and I took the kids. I asked if I could bring
them to that. I would have even paid, but I took them with me.
In the introduction of that class, the adults went around and
told who they were, why they were going back to school and
why it was important. I think that by them being there and
seeing that helped a lot. So, no I don’t feel guilt because they
understand what I’m doing.
Even when some women said their families understood and were supportive of
their educational goals, there were times when they sensed that going back to school was
considered to be “a real pain in the neck” to them. These students developed a sense of
being hyper-vigilant as far as perceiving family needs. They reported they anticipated
what sort of situations might arise where school obligations might be problematic, in areas
such as meals, housework or tension levels. Thus, some students explained that they work
hard to keep things in order to help eliminate their own guilt about being away from home
more than they were before. They believed it was worth the effort to get up earlier so that
things could keep running smoothly. One respondent, a full-time student in a day program
said, ‘Tf things had to slip at home, I would feel guilty. If I have to, I get up an hour or so
earlier to make sure everything gets done. This is my project, not my children’s. Why
should they suffer?”
Another mother explained that she took the responsibility of limiting the impact
her school obligations would have on the potential for family conflict. She knew her
family well, what they could or would tolerate, and what she needed to feel okay.
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Keeping school obligations and family needs balanced was seen as a direct benefit to her
own sense of well-being. She stated, “I am the one that makes sure that there is never a
conflict around school stuff. I don’t want to become miserable and guilty about being in
school.” It is interesting that the students did not perceive that any other family member
should attempt to fill the breech, if school demanded that some services previously
performed by the respondents should become limited.
Some students anticipated school obligations which would be difficult to interface
with family life and projected they might be met by family members. One student
expressed her concern around final examination time:
Finals time will be the hardest. I don’t know how I am going
to handle my finals. It will be so hard to find all that study time.
I’m afraid to try and prepare for them. I’ll either get a bad grade
home or a bad grade at school (laughs). It will really require a
lot of time. I hope my family can understand. Test times are the
worst!
Respondents reported that during finals they used several means of maximizing
study time. If possible, some students arranged their work and home schedules so they
could spend most of their days and evenings at school, using the library as “a quiet refuge
where there is no telephone or T.V..” Others, with rather grim resolve, expressed their
beliefs that during exam time, they would probably do a lot of studying after everyone else
was asleep, and try to get along on only a few hours of sleep per night. Respondents
expressed the desire that their families would be understanding and accommodating during
the times when school became especially demanding.
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Friends have been seen as resources to students in helping to put guilt, family
obligations and reality in perspective. When women have not been able to dialogue with
family members about their ambivalence between guilt and entitlement, friends have been
supportive.
Some respondents described supportive interventions from good friends who gave
the students permission to re-examine their guilt producing ideas by re-examining their
families’ needs. For example, a part-time student in a day-program, who had scheduled all
her classes before noon so she could maintain part-time employment, described her
difficulty in trying to prioritize fixing her high school childrens’ breakfast or attendance at
a 7:00 A.M. class:
At one point, I came home late one time and didn’t get to the
market. I was telling my good friend, my neighbor, about how
I was tormented and kicking myself in the butt because I didn’t
have any breakfast for my kids. They like me to fix these egg-
McMuffin sort of things and I’d get up and figure it was my
responsibility to fix them breakfast in the morning, but I kept
getting to school late. My friend said, ‘Well, do you have any
cereal?’ and I said, ‘Yeah, sure.’ She said, ‘Please.’ That was
the way I though things should have been, but she made me see
they are old enough to fix their own breakfast and to get along
on what I have in the house. I even felt a little embarrassed that
I was still treating the kids like babies. She’s probably right, it
just doesn’t feel comfortable yet.
The respondents who reported they felt the least amount of guilt were the women
who could identify benefits and positive changes which reentry had promoted for their
families. Some students reported that they have felt little guilt because they believed their
return to school had been a good experience for their families, because it caused family
members to reassess how tasks and home chores had been allocated. One student, a single
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mother, said, “If I hadn’t said I was going back to school, my son would never have
learned how to make a washing machine work. Now he does his own laundiy and brags
about it to his friends.”
For another woman, guilt was not a major concern because her job had always
required her to travel quite a bit and so her weekend college program did not seem to be
changing the family’s life style to a great degree:
My guilt may be a little less because in my household my
going back to school does not disrupt the family activities.
Because I travel so very much with my job as it is, and the
kind of job I have is so demanding, they do not expect me
to be home all the time. They already expect me to be away
a lot.
Guilt was experienced in differing intensities from time to time for most of the
respondents. Ambivalence surrounding goals and the acceptable cost to reach those goals
seemed to be characteristic of the reentry experience. One respondent described her
ambivalent feelings about her personal goals and her feelings of guilt:
I want to do this and it’s important to me, but there are still
feelings of guilt. I can’t say I don’t feel it, and I do convince
myself that what I’m doing is important. So, the guilt is okay
because I don’t put him [her husband] first. Me, I’m first (laughs).
Because of that I can rationalize my guilt and say, ‘This is
something I have to do.’ Then I say, ‘Well, gosh, supposing that
when I finish this, then what?’
“Sometimes, he gives conflicting messages”
Every married woman in the sample was capable of having a conversation
regarding how she perceived her husband felt about having a student as a wife.
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Respondents perceived an array of positive to negative feelings from their spouses and/or
children about their decision to return to school and the adjustments reentry had required
of each family member. These have been broadly categorized as resistance/resentment,
support and mixed feelings. Across the sample, respondents reported experiencing all
three responses from time to time. Changes in attitudes were not only situational, but also
occurred over time.
It was difficult for respondents to characterize their husbands as falling continually
into only one category, because spouses’ attitudes varied, often from day to day,
depending on how they perceived their own needs were in conflict with their wives
educational pursuits. As one student, enrolled in a full-time day program explained:
Well, it’s hard to say what he really feels all the time. I mostly
only hear complaints when he wants something I can’t provide.
Usually, he’s pretty supportive, you know, he’ll help out with
cooking and cleaning a little. But, if company’s coming and he
has to vacuum or clean something at the last minute for me, then I
hear him mumble something like, ‘I never bargained to do this work,’
and I know he’s thinking that if I wasn’t in school, he’d only have
to change clothes to be a host, not have to clean the house too.
Other women reported they were not always sure of their husbands’ feelings
because they kept their attitudes toward themselves. Some respondents reported that their
spouses would speak highly of their wives’ academic goals and accomplishments to their
friends and work associates, but these remarks of pride were rarely addressed to the
students personally. For example, one respondent who transferred from a weekend
college program to a traditional day program reported:
Sometimes, he gives conflicting messages. He’ll be talking to his
friends, and he seems proud, yet when he’s only talking with us
and he’s in the house it’s like, ‘Well, I have two students,’ and I
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can feel the anger and bitterness. I have to wonder which he really
means.
Another part-time, evening student reflects some of the same feelings:
One of his friends from work had to come by the house the other
day, and he said to me, ‘Well, I hear you’re doing some pretty
great stuff, going back to school and all.’ I was so surprised. He
[her husband] had never said anything like that to me personally.
It was good to know that he thinks that what I’m doing has some
value and maybe it give him some pride with his friends.
It may be that the lack of direct communication about overall pride or support
contributes to the ongoing hyper-sensitivity to family approval or disapproval the students
reported experiencing. It was stated earlier that women watched body language as well as
listened for articulated statements that might reflect family attitudes about how well they
were managing their additional commitments. If it was perceived that the family was
feeling resentment about her schooling or experiencing a decrease in life style that might
lead to resentment, the student might adjust her own plans or activities to forestall
problems. In the cases where there was reported little verbal communication from
spouses about their attitudes towards their wives’ reentry, women were required to use all
behaviors as communicative devices and interpret them as either “statements” of support
or disapproval. Whether or not their interpretations were accurate could only be based on
their level of knowledge and understanding of their partner. This type of hyper-vigilance
is commonly seen in couples where dialogue about personal issues is not the norm, and is
often reflected by one partner (more often the wife) saying something like, “I have to read
his mind because he never says what he feels.” This attribute cannot be characterized as
indicative of any particular ethnicity or social class, and, rather like the indirect means of
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confrontation described earlier, it reflects only a generic communication style which limits
direct confrontation on a sensitive issue or a comfort (or discomfort) level with personal
disclosure.
A high level of awareness about partners’ communication styles was suggested by
students who acknowledged their mates’ understated feelings. When spousal feelings
seemed to connote resentment or lack of support for the student, they reported that
negative feelings were not expressed in a directly confrontational manner. Instead,
husbands may have referred only indirectly to school as the cause of difficulties at home.
It was up to the student to interpret his statements, based on her own perceptions of his
attitudes, which through observation, as well as interaction, she had acquired over time.
One full-time day student explained:
Sometimes I have to put school first, especially when I have exams,
and he appears as though it’s okay, but yet he comes in at night and
maybe there isn’t any dinner cooked, and he says, ‘Oh, I thought
maybe you’d have fixed something,’ And I say, ‘No.’ He’s usually
not a stickler for dinner, so when he brings it up I know he’s really
talking about school again.
Thus, it became apparent that students became conscious observers of behaviors,
words and attitudes as a way of monitoring their family’s feelings about their level of
acceptance of their wives’ or mothers’ college careers. One respondent said she listens for
the tone of her husband’s voice to know what he is really trying to say, and described his
non-direct ways of expressing his feelings:
I don’t know how he’s feeling, really inside. I have to listen to his
voice, the way he says something. For instance, I know there are
some things that well, if I say, ‘I have homework, I have to do this
right now,’ he’ll say very softly, ‘Yeah, I guess that is more
important than anything.’ I know what he’s saying to me.
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Another type of indirect comment is characterized by the student who described
her husband engaging her son in congenial, teasing sort of interactions that she reports
made her know he was resenting her ongoing focus on schoolwork when she was at
home:
He did complain the other day that...he said to my son, ‘Your
mother doesn’t seem to pay attention to us anymore.’ I chuckled
and said, ‘What do you mean I don’t pay attention to you?’ He
said, ‘Oh, you never come around anymore and tell us that you love
us or pinch our cheeks.’ I said, ‘I do. I thought I do that still.’ I
said, ‘Okay I’ll pay attention to you guys.’ It’s little things like
that, I can hear in his voice or in his speech that let me know he’s
upset. I always try to stay pleasant and then I try to compromise,
so he can feel happy and I can stay happy in school.
Some respondents reported that they believed their husbands were very interested
in their studies, and were indeed proud of their goals and accomplishments, but when
asked how they knew this to be true, had a difficult time defining exactly how they learned
about their husbands’ positive, supportive attitudes. They reported that their knowledge
had been acquired, over time, as a result of a pattern of continuous small statements and
gestures, rather than a few identifiable benchmarks of approval.
Others were less sure of the level of interest their spouses felt about their
educational endeavors. One respondent expressed this inability to judge her husband’s
interest level:
He never really comes out and says, ‘I’m really proud of you.’
Even when I get my grades, and they’re usually pretty good,
‘cause I get A’s and B’s, it’s like I wish he’d talk. Because it’s
just such a strange thing...I don’t know if he’s really interested.
Expressing the same feeling is a first year student, in a full-time day program:
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Well, I think...we’ve been married over twenty years...I think
he’s interested. Anyway, I let him know what happens in school
and what’s happening in my classes and all that. But...I don’t
know if I didn’t bring it up if he would. (Laughs) I’m afraid to
experiment.
One student, a third-year, full-time student who also manages to work twenty
hours per week, questioned her husband’s motivations as she described behaviors she
believed were designed to sabotage her educational plans, although she reported he never
mentioned school:
He works from 7:00 to 3:00 on most days, so he has time to do
a lot of the errands and marketing for us. I’ve been in school
about three and a half years now and I’m beginning to wonder
why when finals come, he gets called to work overtime. It’s
suddenly my fault we have no milk and nobody’s been to the bank.
While some women found it difficult to categorize their husbands’ feelings about
their return to college, other students were able to be more specific, at least in identifying
the causes of what they perceived to be ambivalence in their spouses’ attitudes.
Several respondents reported that they believed financial strain lay at the roots of
their husbands’ mixed feelings. They expressed the idea that if school were not making
like difficult in financial ways, that their husbands would be able to maintain an ongoing
positive attitude. For example, one student stated, “He really likes some of the perks, like
getting tickets to the games and having a local college team to root for, but when it’s time
to pay bills, then school is a pain for him.”
Another respondent discussed her husband’s ambivalence and noted his difficulty
lay with finances not education. She would like to make the transition to a full-time day
program, but at the time of the interview, was working full-time and carrying nine units in
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a night program, and reports that her husband told her, “I don’t care what you do as long
as we have bread on the table. If you win the lottery we can all go to school.” While she
reports he may often make such comments, the same respondent also reports, “He never
really asks, ‘How is it going?’ or anything like that, but if I’m up real late to study, he’ll
more than likely get up and make some tea or something for me.
Some students report that they are convinced that financial strain is the basis for
the negative aspects of their husbands’ attitudes. An example of this is a student, who
reports her return to school has been a definite drain on their resources and states that her
husband’s limited support for her education is directly the result of their diminished
income:
I did change the contract. He always thought I would work, since
I was when we married. If I could contribute to the pot, he’d be
happy with me going back to school. He respects education and he
respects me for wanting it, he just respects money even more.
Other personal or couple variables contributed to spouses’ attitudes toward the
reentry experience. Some respondents were unable to pinpoint causes of inhibited
support, but were positive there was something deeper than finances or changes in family
routines that evoked negative feelings about their return to school. A full-time student, in
her third semester describes her husband as being relatively silent about his attitude toward
her return to school, but has communicated his discomfort in more subtle ways. She is
convinced that her return to school has deeper meaning for her husband than he may even
realize. She explains:
It’s funny because I’ve been in school now for two semesters, well,
this is my third. An things that never used to bother him before now
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are big deals. Like dishes in the sink, or him cooking diner
sometimes. He used to cook dinner or get take-out food before and
it was okay. Now it’s like I’ve let him down if there’s no dinner
ready. I don’t remember him wanting me to watch basketball games
on TV with him. Now it’s important. We argue about money now
that I’m not working as much as before. He really doesn’t, say
much. I don’t even think it’s the money. It’s more than that. This
is something about him and me, and what he thinks I should be
doing. It’s hard to describe.
Another student, sensing much the same thing in her own relationship, reported:
It’s more than just going to school. It’s much deeper than that.
This is just something else and I can’t put my finger on it. School
is just something to blame. School seems to be it, but it’s deeper
than that.
After making this statement, tears filled her eyes as she described other strains in
their marriage, suggesting that her schooling was merely an easy scapegoat for a variety of
problems which remained unaddressed. Triangling in another person or activity, such as
school, as a way of diffusing, externalizing or re-assigning responsibility for couple
problems is a common coping strategy in relationships (Bowen, 1978; Broderick, 1983).
Instead of acknowledging and/or dealing with difficult couple issues, something outside
the couple is identified and drawn into the discussion/disagreement to create stability or
power.
In all triangles, there is a tendency for a pair and an outsider to form. If college is
triangled into the relationship, it may be that the husband will feel as though he is put into
the outsider role, therefore making reentry an easy mark for all couple difficulties.
Husband may see himself as having to compete with his wife’s college career for attention,
as well as resources, and comparing pre-reentry life to their current life style, reframing
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college as a threat to their future or current relationship. One woman, while not using the
term “triangle,” hypothesized about this possibility in her marriage:
He is left out. It wasn’t deliberate, but he’s the kind of person
he is. Somewhere in there is the sense that we don’t fit together
anymore. We do, because he’s an intelligent person, but he’s not
academically inclined.
Another student, who when interviewed was only one semester away from
graduation, reported that her husband had been quite explicit about his concerns that life
would never be the same for them. She reported that he would say things like, “‘You’re
gonna dump me when you graduate.’ He believed that. Or he’d say, ‘You’re gonna make
more money than I do.’ He made it very difficult for me.”
Some students sensed their husbands’ insecurities about their future relationships
with educated wives. While the women did not report that they believed their husbands
were begrudging or jealous of their wives’ college educations, there was a suspicion that
the men may feel lacking in prestige or may even feel discomfort based on their
perceptions of what a college education may mean. For example, one student explained,
“My husband has mixed feelings about me and school. He’s proud of my
accomplishments on one hand, but on the other hand, I think he feels threatened. He has
never been to college.”
Or, as another respondent who perceived her husband’s feelings about her
education have slowly developed over the two and a half years she has been involved in
part-time day classes stated:
I have always tried to minimize my adventures at school. And
I have always tried to make him know he is and always will be
the most important person in my life, but, you know, I think
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there’s an assimilation factor. I have taken on some new ideas,
you know, I have assimilated new ideas and new vocabulary, and
I think he feels intimidated. I’ve changed in some ways in school,
and I think he’s noticed and doesn’t really know how he feels
about those changes.
For one respondent, hindsight has provided the ability to see psychological stress
that was building for her husband over a period of time, which she reports she failed to
note until her relationship was in crisis. She explained how she recalls changes in attitudes
by her family, and especially her husband, as she moved from a P.A.C.E. program into a
full-time program over the space of two years. Her three children were in college or the
last year of high school, with two still living at home. She described the experiences of
four semesters:
The first semester my husband and my children were very proud of
me. The second semester they started to gripe because mom wasn’t
there to take care of them anymore, and bail them out. And my
husband said to me, ‘Well, you did so well, are you going back?’ I
said, ‘Of course I’m going back.’ He said, ‘But you don’t have to go
back, you’ve already proved that you can do it.’ The third semester,
when I was having a difficult time, he would say, ‘You know, you
don’t have anything to prove anymore, because I can take care of
you. As a matter of fact, I don’t want you to do all this work, so if
you dropped out, I wouldn’t think one bit less of you.’ But he didn’t
understand, and I didn’t understand either, that I couldn’t drop out.
The fourth semester I found out he was having an affair with another
woman.
This was the only couple which, at the time of the interview, had experienced such
extreme events that could be relatable to reentry. However, although school was the
crucible for this couple, there were other contributing factors to their marital problems.
While the respondent and her husband initially separated, they also began a program of
marital therapy which identified and addressed some of the underlying issues that stressed
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their marriage. Over time, a reconciliation was achieved and at this date, they remain
married, and report an improved relationship.
Her return to school had become a catalyst wherein his difficulty in coping with his
personal insecurities became overwhelming as he observed her educational efforts were
producing visible changes in her self-confidence and independence. School had become an
additional strain on a marriage which for twenty-five years had been stable, but difficult,
for the partners. Although, on the surface he seemed to her to be undisturbed by her
return to school, she explains how she now knows her education was affecting her
husband:
I didn’t know that he felt my new friends were patronizing him. They
weren’t, but that’s not what he thought. We went to therapy after I
found out about the affair and filed for divorce. We learned a lot.
The marriage had already been hard because I had to take charge. Be
it taxes or finances or whatever, I would fix it and he would come in
and say, ‘I’m the man, I’m in charge.’ I’d back off and say, ‘Okay,
you handle it.’ Then he’d fall on his face. So, it was a difficult
marriage, but I couldn’t leave because I didn’t want my children to
be raised without a father. What came out of therapy is that we love
each other. And that he didn’t need to feel threatened because I
never cared if he wasn’t educated. He has worked two jobs for over
twenty years and makes good money. He is no longer ashamed to
let me know when he can’t read something or write something. I
attribute that to counseling. He was jealous of me. I had no idea
that he was jealous. He’s wonderful now, but I’m not the same. It’s
been two years almost since the affair, but I still think about it
every day.
Reminiscent of other respondents’ statements about their husbands feeling
intimidated by their wives’ higher education, was the above spouse’s own limited
education and a consequential inability to read adequately. He had managed to disguise
his reading difficulties, so well in fact, that his wife was unaware. He had also held at least
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two jobs at any time, and supported the family incredibly well, because of his specialized
skills. As all of this information was revealed throughout the course of therapy, his
insecurities were not only addressed, but it appears they may have been resolved. His
support for his wife has greatly increased, and although there is still residue from the pain
of the affair, the respondent says, “I couldn’t now ask for a better husband.” In fact, she
informed me that her husband is has offered her a reward for good performance in school.
She said, “He tells me all the time, ‘Do a good job and I’ll buy you a Vet when you
graduate.’”
Not all respondents perceived negative feelings or psychological strain in their
mates. Some reported only supportive attitudes and behaviors from their spouses (n=7,
28%). While they did report that school obligations did occasionally put a strain on family
schedules, housework and social activities, overall, they felt supported and encouraged in
their goal of graduating from college. One woman, who is in her first year in a full-time
day program said she believed her husband was so supportive because, “My husband is the
one that suggested that I come back to school, so he is supportive.”
Other women offered possible reasons for their husbands' positive approach to the
reentry process. For example, a student in a weekend program, described her perceptions
of her husband’s motivations:
I think he is pleased that he can give me this opportunity. He sees
it that way, that he’s giving me this opportunity to go back to
school. He’s proud of himself getting me to do something that
he knows has always been something I have always wanted to do.
He knows I have helped everybody else to do this. I have helped
him with his business and worked hard to be supportive of him, so
it’s time for me to do something I really want to do.
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Other students had hypotheses also, about why their husbands were not only
supportive but engaged as well in their school experience. A common theme was the
family’s high regard for education, as one respondent explained:
School work is part of our conversation at home. It is. When he
was in school, some twenty odd years ago, he went to junior
college first and then on to get his B. A , I used to write his papers
for him. So, he’ll say, ‘Well, if it’s writing papers you have to do,
you’ll do okay, because you got me through.’ But, he’s still
anxious to see how I do. ‘What grade did you make?’ Talking
about school has always been a part of our lives.
Another student, also in a weekend program, explains that while her husband
doesn’t seem to have too much to say about her school life, his actions speak volumes,
because he is so involved in the family. She says about her husband, “He’s always been
there, and that’s what’s afforded me the opportunity to do what I do professionally as well
as returning to school. He works pretty much 9:00 to 5:00, so I know he will be there at
home to take care of whatever needs to be done. I feel very supported by him.”
It would appear that a past history of responsibilities outside the house, including
employment, children’s activities or other kin obligations, had acculturated some husbands
to wives who had demanding schedules and limited time at home. This may have been a
factor in the easy transition to school that was experienced by some respondents and their
spouses and/or families. One woman, who is a full-time student in a junior college day
program related that returning to school did not change what was expected of her at home
because her husband was used to her having a busy schedule. She said:
We’ve been married for twenty-one years. I’ve always been in
P.T. A., Pee Wee sports or church work. He adjusted to me being
on the go a long time ago. In fact, I think he’d be shocked to ever
find me sitting on the sofa. It’s not my style, never has been and
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he knows it. So, going back to school didn’t really change anything
for us. I just have something different to talk about at night.
It is somewhat difficult to generalize about family stress levels and their
relationship to the reentry process. Some women report relatively little stress, with
spouses proactively supporting her return to school. In some households, it can be
observed that as wife and/or mother takes on additional obligations and interests that there
are difficulties in adjustments, unrelated to other issues. For other families, however,
school seems to be the externalizing vehicle for couple insecurities or disagreements. Or,
it may be that the additional strain on finances, schedules and household chores
contributes to the maintenance of family tensions. The combinations of variables that
mediate the spousal response varies from case to case.
Financial strain has been identified as one variable that contributed to diminished
support or enthusiasm. Another variable which also seemed contribute considerably to the
level of support or enthusiasm, would have to be the length of time the student had been
in school. In situations where the student was currently married, the respondents who had
been enrolled in classes the longest reported higher levels of stress for their families, which
some women characterized as “battle fatigue.” As one student, enrolled in a traditional
day program stated, “We’re all burnouts. (Laughs). My education has burned us all out.
It will be good to be finished. There will be extra time and extra money because I can be
back to work. Let me tell you, we’re gonna celebrate.”
Another respondent, finishing up a two-year program in a weekend college setting,
reported:
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It’s been a long haul, going year-round for two years. I guess we’re
all going to be glad when it’s over. But, it wasn’t so bad because it
was only on the weekends, and it was harder on me than anyone else.
I won’t know what to do with my spare Saturdays and Sundays
Other students, who have been enrolled in classes for a longer period o f time
report that the “pace” of the family is different because of her return to school:
I’m always in high gear. Trying to find time to study and do anything
else is impossible. So, I try to go fester to make up for it. Then when
I’m with my husband or the kids, I can slow down...maybe. Usually,
what happens though, is that because I’m going fast, everyone else
starts speeding up too. It makes things tense sometimes, because
now we all seem to be in high gear all the time.
Those students who were nearing graduation reported more statements from
mates, such as, “This has been hard. I’m glad it’s almost over,” almost as though it was
finally safe enough to express their feelings, now that the end was in sight.
According to other women, as their spouses sensed that the reentry experience for
their wives was coming to a successful conclusion, some husbands reflected a more
relaxed attitude about college demands. “It’s like he got a second wind to help me finish
this up. We’re getting along better now than when I started.” Children also were
reported to have positive attitudes toward their mothers’ anticipated graduation.
“Mom, go and do vour school work, we’ll see about dinner”
None of the respondents indicated a perception that their children actively resented
their mothers returning to college. When there was disapproval, the women perceived
their children’s attitudes to be ambivalent and situational. However, overall most mothers
reported they felt interest and support from their children. In fact, in some instances a
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closer bond, and an area of common interest was developed between the returning student
and her child. This was especially true for women whose children were also attending
college. One mother reported:
My daughter and I have become closer. And because she is in
school, she proofs, she edits, she reads my papers. So we work
together on a lot of things. She has been included in it [mother’s
educational process], but I didn’t ask her to be. It was just that
since she was in school and I was in school...we’ve just sort of
shared that way.
In some cases, women who described relationships with their children which had
become somewhat distanced and strained as their sons and daughters had grown, had been
rekindled by returning to college. “We have something in common again,” one respondent
reported. ‘1 think my returning to school has validated all the years I yelled at her to do
her homework.” Even older children, who no longer live at home, were reported to have
taken an interest in their mothers’ ambitions. One student explained that her daughter,
who has already graduated from college, seems to want to be more involved in a
relationship with her now more than ever before:
My first daughter, the one who has graduated, is so proud of me.
I can’t believe how interested she is. She calls me now every
other night and asks about my classes and my projects. We talk
now about school subjects and events, besides just the family
stuff. It’s so nice.
Mothers perceived their children’s interest in the choice to return to school and
efforts put forward in returning to school, as a positive benefit in all cases. The women
saw this interest as both rewarding and encouraging, especially if they were not
experiencing such support from their spouses. And, indeed, some respondents expressed
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the feeling that their children may be more interested in their schooling than their
husbands. As one woman stated, ‘I tell my daughter about school and share my
experiences with her and not my husband. She has a higher interest level than he does.”
If husbands were only minimally expressive, most of the respondents reported
incidences of overt unsolicited support from their children. Knowing of their children’s
interest and support was stated as being something the returning students needed in order
to bp able to focus on and pursue their educational goals. Children’s approval may have
also helped to mitigate feelings of guilt that returning mothers may experience when their
time at home may be compromised by other obligations. One mother, who is a full-time
student in a day program, with two high-school aged children, described an event in her
farpily:
I wasn’t feeling well a couple of weeks ago, and I had mid-terms
coming up, and they said, ‘Mom, go and do your school work,
we’ll see about dinner.’ And I came outside and they had the table
all set and they made the dinner and they even put some little
flowers in the middle of the table. So, I know they are trying to
help me.
Feeling supported seems to be a crucial element in a successful experience for the
returning student. Some mothers have expressed the feeling that they could not remain in
school if they didn’t have their children’s support. Recalling Mohney and Anderson’s
(1988), enabling factors, children being old enough to be somewhat self-maintaining was a
major consideration in the decision to return to school. Additionally, Wilkinson (1984), in
her characterization of African-American middle class families points out the emphasis on
the close supervision of childhood and the close attachment and involvement with
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children’s goals and lives experienced in these families. Mothers’ concern for the well
being of their children and the need to feel that returning to school is not negatively
impacting them, would necessarily place great importance on children’s attitudes. A
second-year student in weekend college, whose occupational routine requires some
evening and weekend work describes her children’s attitudes:
They are definitely behind me. And if they weren’t, I don’t
think I could do this, at least not on the weekends. If they were
real demanding...because I am not the kind of mom that you can
say, ‘Well, my mother will definitely be here every weekend.
When Friday night comes my mom is here Friday night until
Sunday, and then she goes back to work.’ So, the little time
that they do get with me, they cherish it, right? So, if they
weren’t cooperating or looking at this in a positive light, they
could demand, ‘Look mom, you don’t spend enough time as it
is with us,’ and make me feel really guilty. I don’t think I could
live with that.
It is, however, unrealistic to assume that attitudes are going to remain constantly
positive and supportive. Children’s schedules, homework, activities and other practical
needs sometimes conflict with mom’s college routine. In some families, this strain only
surfaced occasionally; in others, mothers sensed That whiletheir-ehfldren were generally
supportive, they did express feelings from time to time that seemed to indicate they had
mixed emotions about their mothers returning to school. For some mothers, this
occasional disapproval was not seen as threatening because it was associated only with the
respondents’ inability to be as available as she was before she returned to school; and as
was often stated with regards to children’s disapproval, “It’s hard to be available for
everything they want me to do, no matter what I’m involved in.” One student describes
this experience:
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When I’m under stress or can’t do what they want me to do at
that time, they blame school. They will say something like, T il
be glad when school is over so you can he happy, or so you can
do such and so’...fill in the blank.
The women report the children’s statements about their disappointments with
limited services available are not perceived as directly challenging their mothers’ goals.
Instead they are viewed as the same sort of generic, spontaneous complaints made by
children when they are unable to get their immediate needs met. These kinds of
expressions, taken individually, were not seen as guilt producing. However, when they
were frequent and became ongoing, students reported they felt concern.
Ambivalent feelings about mom returning to school does not necessarily infer that
the feelings are negative. Some mothers suggested that their children were having to
decide exactly what they felt about having a student for a mother. One returning student,
who is a full-time traditional day program with a twelve year-old son, was not sure she
knew for certain how he felt about her returning to college:
In one sense, he is proud of me and tells me he likes that I’m
doing something I want to do. In another sense, he’s not sure
if he should let anybody at his school know what I am doing.
So, I’m getting mixed messages from him. I don’t know quite
yet how I should act around his friends so he can feel I’m normal.
Another student described her son’s particular ambivalent attitudes toward her
college career. She explained that she believed he was struggling with the notion of higher
education in general, not really her choice to return to school. She attributes his now
more positive attitude toward education, including his own as more of a sign of his
maturity, than any change in feelings about her own return to college. She reports that it
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has been an interesting experience to watch his attitude toward her (and his) education
change over the two years she has been in a full-time evening program;
At one point he said he would never go to college. He said, ‘That’s
a white man’s affair. You bought into that concept. You sold out.
Not me!’ However, I also would hear him talking to his friends and I
know he went out of his way to let them know what I was doing.
Even now, he won’t come out and talk so much to me, but I still
hear him. Also, he has now registered for two classes at our junior
college.
Sometimes, children’s attitudes towards their mothers’ schooling depended on the
amount of accommodation that was required of them. Rescheduling around
transportation needs and household chores were negotiated early on, as described by one
student, “When I told them I was going back to school, they sort of groaned and joked,
‘More chores means more allowance.’ So, they were expecting some changes in that
direction.” For the most part, women reported that they consciously attempted not to
burden family members with extra work or inconvenience that would make them resent
mom’s new undertaking. Some of the more difficult negotiations were around life style.
Negotiating study time was said to be one topic that was consciously discussed
with children across the sample. No one described the changing of family behaviors to
facilitate mom’s need to study as an unsolicited event. In other words, change in life style
did not come voluntarily or as their own idea. Some changes were easier to accomplish
and some left residue that spilled out on those occasions when school was an issue. One
respondent described her particular process with her son:
I don’t think it just happened [changing behaviors], because he
knew I would be studying and in a few minutes there’d be this
loud music. He has his own little set up in his room. So, I’d
go up and tell him to turn it down, and he would, until the next
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time. This used to happen a lot. I couldn’t stand the music. I’d
get the bass and so I’d have to go upstairs and knock on the door
because there is not screaming at the top of your lungs, they don’t
hear with all that noise, you know. And I’d say, ‘Please.’ Well,
now he knows to ask before he turns it up. We’re trying to share
the air-space now.
For the most part, students reported that their children found their mothers’ desire
to return to school interesting and worthy of observation. A majority of students stated
that their children asked about their school attendance and the grades they received on
their assignments, as well as course grades. Whether or not, mothers’ schooling
influenced better grades in their children was a debatable point in this sample, but
respondents indicated that, as students themselves, they were expected to at least
maintain, and more likely surpass the family academic standards that had been set for their
children. In one household, mom’s education has become a topic which is part of the
children’s social network. This mother of high school children who is in a weekend
program reported:
Their friends know I’m going to college. They are at the house
a lot and so they may say, ‘Okay, Mrs. Q, have you gotten your
report card? Have you gotten your paper back? What did you
get on your test?’ So, it’s not just my kids that are rooting for
me, it’s like my extended family which I call their friends, are a
part of it to some degree too.
Where education has been a positive experience for the children of the family,
there was a more supportive attitude maintained about mom’s return to school. For
families where children were doing well or had done well in school, the reentry experience
was seen as a validating statement about the value of education as well as a sense of
personal accomplishment. However, one respondent in the sample described her children
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as being non-achievers in school, or at least in their college experiences. She attributed
their lack of perseverance and their decisions to leave college, to, what she termed, her
history of indulgent parenting. She stated she believes her college-age children sometimes
are non-supportive because she is doing something that as of yet none has been able to
complete:
My children are proud of me. They say so and I believe them, but
sometimes they act so selfishly and lay into me for not taking time
to be more helpful in their activities. A friend of mine told me that
they were jealous of me, which I couldn’t visualize at first. But she
may be right. Because, I am succeeding after being out of school
for twenty-eight years and they can’t get by without being on
probation from semester to semester. If they are jealous, it’s too
bad! It makes me feel really sad that they give me such a hard time
sometimes. (Tears) Why can’t they just be happy for me?
During the interviews, when the respondents reported that their children and/or
spouses expressed disapproval about college goals or the impact reentry was having on
family issues, it was accompanied by increased levels of affect, sometimes sadness, anger
or regret. Tears or raised voices punctuated their feelings of frustration that their children
(even more so than their husbands, whose behavior they often justified) had lapses of
support. In their study of depression symptoms among reentry women, Roehl and Okun
(1984) found that “family social support is inversely related to depression symptoms”
(p.251). While psychological testing was not part of this present research, it is interesting
to note the respondent’s emotional responses when they recall their children’s expressions
of disapproval or rejection of their mothers’ goals.
Accommodation and adaptation to new routines, chores and behaviors were easier
for some families than others. Nevertheless, all reentry students reported that their
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families had to make some adjustments. It was the amount and type of adjustment that
often contributed to the level of approval or disapproval expressed.
“I look at things differently now.”
There were a variety of perceptions about levels of personal change experienced by
the respondents as a result of the reentry process. Some emphasized their acquisition of
greater knowledge, while others stressed other less-academic areas of personal growth.
It is interesting that when asked if returning to school had changed them, most of
the respondents not only agreed, but were able to identify specific areas or items in which
they could observe differences in themselves. Threads of personal fulfillment and
accomplishment, as well as increased self-confidence and wisdom were woven throughout
the respondents’ comments on the benefits of their college experience. Because each
woman’s experience was unique, there was a broad spectrum of comments reflecting
attitudes toward personal achievement and growth.
One student characterized her educational career as “liberating” in the sense that
she felt empowered to make decisions based on her own knowledge. “I’ll never ask
anyone who I should vote for again. I’ve gained enough knowledge to know what I know
and know what I don’t know. For me, that’s liberating.”
Some students commented on the practical skills they had brought with them, but
which had been refined as a student. A weekend college student in her third year
discussed the increase in her abilities to organize and problem solve. She said, “I’ve
always been busy, with a lot on my plate, but I do it all better now. I’ve learned to
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manage better...manage my time among other things. I now know how to prioritize. I’m
more analytical. I look at things differently.”
Another student, a single mother in a full-time night program describes how her
attitudes have changed over time:
I am more open-minded. You know I even got into therapy. A lot
of Black people don’t put stock in therapy, it’s just the way we were
raised. You learn to cope, you learn to be strong. My therapist was
really helpful, and I remember telling him, ‘You know five years ago
I never would have considered coming here and talking to a white
boy.’ I’m serious, about my life and revealing things about me. I
would never have considered that before. Now I enjoy dancing with
new ideas from time to time.
A part-time day student, who also is employed full-time and a single mother, has
not had a easy time in college because of her demanding work and family schedule and
limited resources. While she has recognized her own accomplishments as praiseworthy,
she also questions the benefits her education will have for her in the future:
I’ve learned how important it is to struggle, and how happy it is to sit
back and smile at yourself finally. Not at anything else, but at
yourself for making that achievement. At the same time, I look
around me and I think that as I progress, sometimes I get angrier. I
don’t see things changing much. The more they change the more the
stay the same, you know?
Students were not the only family members that identified changes as a result of
college. Some respondents reported that while they perceived little changes in themselves
outside of what they saw as superficial changes in vocabulary or factual knowledge, their
spouses had different beliefs. One weekend college student related:
I’m still just me. I am growing in knowledge, but he sees this as
growing apart. I don’t know if he thinks this is just because I’m
going to college and knowing different people than he knows or
being exposed to different things, but he thinks I’m different. I
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consciously talk about old memories and things we will do
together in the future to help him know I will always be there.
He doesn’t realize that going to school was about me, not about
him.
As for this student, for most respondents, their changes in knowledge and
vocabulary, while seen as possible temporary distancing agents, were not reported as
threats to their marital relationship. These changes were instead seen as need for further
adjustments from husbands. One full-time student and part-time employee described this
attitude well:
Well, he has learned how to cook TV dinners and see foreign films.
He doesn’t enjoy doing either one of those things, but he can do
them both now [laughs]. So, once I’m home more, he’ll be fine
with the educated me. Maybe we can compromise...no TV dinners
for him and an occasional foreign film for me.
Another student framed her education as a search to find her “gift.” She applied
this symbolism to both her reentry and her husband’s career
He had a gift. Everyone saw it before he did. He only saw it as a
money-making tool. He just turned fifty, and it’s taken him all these
years to believe what he’s been told by everybody, that he has a gift.
He’s a che£ a wonderful, skilled chef. I have a gift too. I’m still
learning about how to develop my gift. Now it feels like for the first
time, we might be growing, both of us.
The identification of her husband as gifted was certainly accurate. I know this to
be true, because each time we met, this student produced the most wonderful pastries
prepared by her husband. They were indeed delectable works of art. We ate as much as
we talked, with the consequence being that transcribing our conversations was always
difficult, since the taped reproduction tended to be garbled because so much of the time
our mouths were full.
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Whether or not the changes perceived by students and family members would be
permanent changes is difficult to predict. They may be temporary attitudes reflecting
current changes in the family system, personal coping strategies, or the beginnings of new
family interactional styles. Husbands’ anticipation that their wives may be “different” may
be affecting their current attitudes and behaviors as well. Thus, changes may take many
forms, depending on what long-term occupational or life style changes occur for the
reentry students.
Notwithstanding what social or financial benefits might be anticipated by the
students, they seemed to reflect the notion that returning to school was providing
sufficient personal rewards to support and encourage their continuing efforts toward then-
educational goals. Again, as mentioned earlier, the respondents in this study were those
who, based on their continued enrollment in school were necessarily more satisfied than
those who may have dropped out and did not become members of the sample.
Their overall high levels of satisfaction with the reentry experience did not prevent
them from acknowledging that parts of the process were especially challenging and
difficult because of their minority status.
“It is still very much a white system.”
No matter what the individual benefits of reentry were for each student, across the
sample the students asserted that structural inequality in education as an institution
remains in place, if not intact. The respondents communicated that while they were
personally achieving a sense of legitimacy in the educational system, they overwhelmingly
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acknowledged that they were also aware of their minority status. The concept of
prejudice was addressed from a variety of perceptions, with regard to several topics.
Course Content Statements regarding course content covered a wide range of
attitudes toward individual faculty’s lack of knowledge to their predisposition to limit
subject matter to “the white world.” A full-time employee and a part-time student at a
community college described her discouragement with the content of most classes:
Young people...all they hear is the negative. That they’re all bad and
shoot people. I mean, they don’t really show accomplishments. We
surely have many more leaders than Dr. King. Dr. King was chosen
by the white man to be a leader. But certainly there are many others
like Adam Clayton Powell, Thurgood Marshall, which just got
recognized lately. And then students get discouraged. Returning
students get discouraged because they don’t know this knowledge
about their history. So, they sit in the classroom and here’s this
English teacher, teaching lit, and not showing one African-American
writer. We have Langston Hughes, we have many great writers. So
you kind of get caught up in wondering, ‘Who am I learning this?’
This isn’t the proper education. I know that we did something in this
country. And so you kind of get a hold toward yourself and ask,
‘Why am I going back to school?’
Another student, in a weekend college program, expressed some of the same
frustrations:
The reality is it is still very much a white system and I know it is. My
work environment and my social environment is so very diverse, until
I sometimes lose sense of the real reality that’s out there. So, I have
to step back from it and say, ‘Okay, this is not necessarily a system
that is open to African-Americans still.’ I guess it was brought home
to me when I was listening to my professor talking about the feminist
movement and blatantly missing from her delivery was anything
about the black experience of the black feminists and what their
experience had been. Which forced us to say, ‘Wait a minute.
There’s a group out here which has been left out, that you didn’t
discuss.’ Now she’s starting to include that in the discussions. But I
think, ‘God, this is pretty sad, because if I hadn't been here and
maybe not raised it [the question], that class would have been taught
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and that perspective would never have been shared with the students.
So, things like that remind me that it’s still pretty much a white world
in academia.
The question of universities’ needs for individual departments for specific ethnic
studies also evoked a range of responses, with some students suggesting that every
ethnicity should have, if not an entire department devoted to its study, at least several
classes devoted to its exploration. Others remarked that all classes should be multi
cultural, eliminating the need for ethnic frameworks. However, there was agreement that
department chairs should monitor and advise their faculty to include as many cultural
elements as possible in each course.
Bias. Only two respondents suggested that they had observed overt bias against
minorities in their reentry experience. Generally, they reported that, if anything, they
sensed there was an attitude of indifference to minority students. Large institutions “don’t
have helping hands for anyone, especially minorities,” said one student. However, one
student described her own observations at the four-year university she attends:
I think, I know I belong because I’m here. But a feeling of
belonging, no. A t [a particular university], you’ll probably find
a handful of Blacks. Starting a t , I was told that ‘You’ll do
good if you make it through that department.’ Almost stating to me
that the department was kind of biased towards certain people of
color. But, even with that, that’s a challenge to me. It makes me
work harder, not to prove anything to anybody else, but to prove to
myself. From all the stereotypes that have been taught to me over
the years, that I am a good a competitor as anybody else.
Some students, when questioned, agreed in varying degrees that African-American
students are subject to stereotypical attitudes that they are less capable and/or less
prepared for college than other students. One respondent, reflecting on this notion,
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reminded, “If we’re able to get into college and make the grade then people ought to
lighten up. It’s hard enough being yourself let alone trying to UN-be who someone else
thinks you are.”
While institutional bias was not reportedly observed by most of the respondents,
some did state that they had experienced negative attitudes on the part of some
individuals. For those that reported attitudes of prejudice in other students or in faculty
member, it was also noted that they were an exception. In these cases, the women felt
they were capable of challenging incorrect perceptions or rejecting comments as ignorant.
One student said, “When someone on campus is rude, I generally say to myselfj ‘Consider
the source.’ I have met so many really great people, that I’m hoping I’m learning to see
the world filled with individuals, some white, some black and some assholes.”
Opportunities. Having met the challenge of reentry and conquering it, students
may not be guaranteed employment or financial rewards commensurate with their
educational achievements. Respondents reflected mixed feelings about limitations based
on their gender or ethnicity being the greatest barrier, with the additional variable of
poverty for some women. One student, soon to graduate from a weekend program
summarized the situation well:
Maybe, and I don’t know for women, if the system just discourages
you or if it’s the job market itself but basically you feel that if you do
get the education, then you probably don’t get the job that matches
up with it. I don’t know. But, I do know that when you look at it
on its face, that you still are reminded that you are a minority. And
you know there are a lot of reasons why there are not a lot of others
like you in class. Either they are not aware of the programs, and
those that are aware of the programs probably can’t afford it, or they
don’t know how to go through the system in order to try to obtain
grants. It’s always something.
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Chapter Five
DISCUSSION AND CONCLUSIONS
Little literature exists on the reentry experience of middle or upper-middle class
African-American women. The majority of the literature on the reentry experience has
been white reentry women. The relative lack of literature available on the Black reentry
experience may be the result of several conditions; for example, bias of researchers, the
use of campus specific samples which may have tended to minimize the number of
African-American reentry students available to make up a sample, or the desire for
generalizability to the dominant population. While the experiences of the women in these
white samples can not be seen as normative, they do provide a basis for examining points
of similarity within social classes for both African-American and white reentry students,
since the literature tends to reflect middle-class attitudes and experiences. Differences in
experience between groups, especially at the structural level, can also be clarified by
general comparison to the existing literature on reentry.
An exploration of the parallels and differences between middle-class reentry
women of the same social class provides an ideal site to examine the complex matrix of
gender, race and social class. Social class must be seen as interwoven throughout society
as a whole, and on the micro level, social class is interwoven throughout the recurring
themes of this research: Role strain, family ideology and family structure. Further, social
class may be the most salient variable in explaining the dynamics that occur at the
convergence o f gender and race; addressing the continuing debate which asks the
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question, “Are middle-class African-American women more similar to white middle-class
women than they are to poor African-American women? How does race interact with
social class to shape personal goals and the experience of pursuing those goals for women
of color?
This research supports the notion that gender ideology on a social, familial, and
especially on the individual level, is not a static concept, but one that is continuously
constructed by interactions with personal talents, resources, cultural norms and, in the
case of African-American women, constraints by the larger social structure, since
women’s experiences are embedded in the inequalities of society. Further, this research
will contribute to the burgeoning literature which examines how those inequalities, i.e.,
race and social class, intersect with gender.
The main findings, in terms of the research questions indicate that while middle-
class African-American reentry women are unique in their social niche and experiences,
they also share some commonalties with white middle-class reentry women. Therefore,
social class analysis informs the understanding of the varied reentry experiences of these
women, has much to offer the existing education literature. By identifying the diversities
as well as the commonalties of women’s experiences as reentry students, modes of
learning, types of programs, and curriculum can be amended to serve the needs of women
who must remain in the workforce as they pursue college degrees and/or who have unique
family commitments. The relevance of income as a barrier or enabler to the returning
student has implications for policy decisions for academic bureaucracies, programs, and
funding sources.
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For example, the fact that financial aid is extremely limited for part-time students is
especially problematic for women, who because of multi-demands on their time and
resources, must restrict their college attendance to part-time status. Class scheduling
which offers few time or section alternatives further complicates the life of the part-time
student. Additionally, alternative programs, such as weekend college, which allow the
student to maintain her employment and the bulk of her household duties should be
encouraged in the university system. Finally, campus programs for returning women
and/or women of color should be not only be available, but should be visible and pro
active in the support of reentry students. The remainder of the chapter will discuss the
push-pull effects of school bureaucracies, personal goals, mother-guilt, and conflicting
messages in the larger social structure about the appropriate roles for women of color
through the themes of role strain, family ideology and family structure.
Role Strain
Certainly social class analysis is a valuable tool in exploring the complex strategies
devised by the students to deal with both the expected and unexpected demands placed on
them daily, by their families, employers and schools. Keeping family lifestyle as much like
pre-college as possible remained a high priority for the students throughout their college
careers, and this was accomplished often at the cost of sleep, lunch hours, or leisure.
Having the ability to pay for housekeeping services, pre-prepared or fast food, sending
shirts and blouses to the laundry or other services, was seen as one of the few ways
students could relieve some of the pressure that they felt in their homes. Unfortunately,
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some of the women did not have the resources to regularly rely on convenience foods, or
outside services.
A generalized dilemma that was reported by the women was the new time
constraints placed on spousal and parental relationships. Even with conscious efforts by
the respondents to minimize any inconvenience to family members, achieving pre-college
quality time together became a major challenge, experienced to a different degree and with
different meaning for each family member. Respondents report that conflict between
study time, work time and family time were ongoing issues, and were usually initially
addressed by the student rearranging and/or limiting her personal time schedule. Certain
routines or behaviors were developed to prevent the development of guilt that might by
incurred by pursuing her own goals at the expense of her family.
An interesting fact is that while the women in this study described their coping
strategies, their dilemmas and disappointments, decreasing their commitment to school
was not an alternative. Students reported that they might occasionally use vacation time
or sick leave to put in extra time for exams or major projects, if possible, but there were
no reports of skipping classes, failing to turn in assignments or a decrease in the attempt to
maintain reading assignments as a means of accommodating family needs. For the most
part, given the exceptions of course work which was specifically difficult for some
students (e.g., algebra, physical science, philosophy, etc.), the respondents maintained
G.P.A.’s above the 2.7 level and made statements such as, “I usually get good grades, A’s
and B’s, so I can be proud to show my family my grades.” And, while no one spoke about
family problems making school work impossible, students acknowledged they were aware
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of the potential or existing strains their new obligations and priorities placed on
relationships with their spouses and/or children. Yet they maintained the personal
importance of their educational goals and were not willing to abandon them unless the
cost to other was perceived to be too great.
Extended family and social obligations also elicited feelings of guilt. In this sample,
regardless of income, there was no indication that women were able to rely on their family
or social networks for household support. In fact, students reported they felt guilt
because they were unable to maintain pre-college levels of support for their own children
or extended family in baby-sitting grandchildren (or nieces or nephews), hosting holiday
gatherings, or in their social network, i.e., church organizations, baby showers, book
clubs, luncheons, etc. The returning women were at the point in their lives where they had
become the resources for adult children or aging parents, a caregiving role ascribed in
society to women across social classes. The inability to fulfill these expectations meant
there was an ongoing internal dialogue which debated the value of their educational
pursuits versus the perceived cost to family members.
Thus a need to find strategies to cope with these feelings was imperative.
Respondents consciously tried to avoid situations that would be guilt producing. One of
the most effective ways to do this was by adjusting personal schedules to eliminate as
much as possible any adjustments by family members. The fewer the family adjustments
required, the more successful the student viewed her return to school. In fact, guilt was
characterized as a feeling that would diminish, if not destroy, the rewards of reentry. Thus,
certain routines or behaviors that were seen as preventative (e.g., having several meals in
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the freezer, storing clothes for the cleaners in the trunk of the car to facilitate drop of£
getting up one-two hours earlier in the morning to add extra time to the day), were put in
place to circumvent potential guilt producing situations. Weekend college was seen as a
strategy in minimizing guilt, since the ability to maintain their employment status quo and
weekday schedules for their families relieved them of much of the sense of sacrifice they
were asking of spouses and children. In fact, women who were in a weekend college
program experienced overall the least conflict, guilt or role strain. This suggests that
alternative programs such as weekend college may provide the best of both worlds for
wives and mothers, at least as far as coping with role strain and “mother guilt” is
concerned.
Guilt also appeared to be associated with family conflict and the perceptions of
lowered marital satisfaction. The group which experienced the greatest frequency of
conflict and the lowest marital satisfaction were full-time students with family incomes in
the range of $40,000-549,999 (below $40,000, the sample contained only single mothers).
These couples had established stable work and family life styles on predictable incomes,
which had been threatened, if not disrupted, by wives’ decisions to return to school. Even
a family income of $40,000 (before taxes), while capable of providing an adequate life
style does not leave much margin for frivolous or carefree spending, thus an unstable
income was problematic. Therefore, husbands’ problems with their wives’ reentry may
not indicate they had negative attitudes about school per se, but may be reflective of
possible resentment about the resulting changes in their own lives, based on their spouses’
return to school. Some wives in this category had drastically reduced the family income
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by working only part-time instead of full-time, or in some cases quitting their jobs
altogether. Income, then appears to contribute to role strain for husbands as well as
wives, since husbands were called on to be supportive of their wives’ goals and at the
same time feel the pressures of reduced income. At the same time some of these wives
had made the decision to return to school without consulting their husbands, adding an
additional challenge to their husbands’ abilities to be supportive. Thus, husbands’ real or
perceived disinterest or dissatisfaction was embedded in layers of marital expectations and
cannot be attributed only to their wives’ interest in continuing their educations.
The children of this sample perceived fewer problems with the reentry experience
than did their fathers, since they actually increased the amount of time spent with their
mothers. As the returning students attempted to find their own study time, they invited
their children to spend time studying together with them, which seemed to be a positive
experience for both mother and children. In addition, children who were in school offered
advice and expressed interest in their mothers’ school work. More discussion occurred
between mother and children on research topics, writing skills and achievement. Children
became “grade monitors” and demanded “good report cards” from them.
Some mothers reported their college age children who were away from home,
especially daughters, telephoned frequently to process each others’ collegiate successes
and failures, seeming to enjoy having common experiences to share. Thus, overall,
mothers reported they grew closer to their children through shared common experiences
and interests in academic subjects.
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Spousal and family support is closely related to role strain, and can be described as
being on a continuum with instrumental support (help with household tasks, etc.) on one
end and emotional support (praise, interest, lack of criticism, etc.) on the opposite end,
with the majority of the sample falling in the central area of overlap. Length of time in
school, type of program, and levels of family adjustments seemed to be the variables most
affecting levels of both types of support. While respondents reported they were almost
always aware of their children’s feelings about their mothers’ school careers and could
adjust activities to accommodate fluctuations between support or dissatisfaction, they
were not as confident with regard to their husbands’ attitudes, putting the reentry women
in the anxious position of always wondering how well they were “measuring up” in their
husbands’ eyes.
Because husbands were relatively silent about their wives’ endeavors while at
home, wives often learned of their husbands’ feelings of pride or frustration from mutual
friends, especially friends from work. Women reported they actually anticipated reports of
frustration, but were surprised by hearing that their husbands expressed pride about their
return to school. Most wives complained that their husbands seemed to be, for the most
part, disinterested, and listened to their school stories out of politeness. An exception to
this was the interest they exhibited in the grades their wives received for course work and
exams throughout the semester, with special interest in their semester grades. It is
apparent that family members’ positive or negative responses to the return to college were
directly related to levels of role strain experienced by the student.
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In some cases, the returning women found more support from their friends than
from their spouses. It was to other women that the reentry women turned to get support
or advice in dealing with the conflicting demands of college and family. Support
sometimes consisted of advice and encouragement to reduce mother services that were
labeled as “spoiling the kids.” Trying to provide hot breakfasts or special cooked to order
meals were eliminated, but only with the continued support of friends and/or relatives
outside the system. Family members did not volunteer to adjust their personal schedules
or to assume additional chores. These changes emerged as a result of assertive statements
of requirements made by the respondents, with the knowledge that if the requests had not
been made, their specific needs would not have been addressed. Consequently, the reentry
experience was seen by the students as a personal joumey, with success depending on
individual ability to meet the demands of family, employment and school.
Role strain was anticipated as part of the challenge by the students themselves, but
other family members who likewise experienced it, did not feel the responsibility to resolve
it. The traditional feminine responsibilities of wife, mother and financial helpmate
remained the model wherein each woman strategized to additionally pursue her own goals
with minimum disruption to their existing family system. It is interesting to note that none
of the women expressed dissatisfaction with their identities as wives, mothers or
employees. Their dilemmas and frustrations emerged as results of the constraints placed
on their personal aspirations by the traditional societal expectations of society, as well as
family. Sufficient financial resources were able to mediate some gender role constraints by
providing the ability to purchase “replacements or supplements” (i.e., outside cleaning,
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cooking or laundry help) for their own presence. For most African-American families,
middle-class lifestyle depends on two breadwinners, and returning to college in most cases
threatened financial stability if the woman’s employment status was altered. However, in
this sample, the perceptions of level of financial impact and/or sacrifice differed between
spouses. Students believed that as part of their decision to return to school financial
conditions had been considered, individually if not as a couple. The women felt there was
sufficient income on which to “get along,” and in their eyes a temporarily acceptable
amount of lowered income was worth the sacrifice. No amount of discussion seemed to
resolve their opposing views and it appears that the differing views of husbands and wives
on finances and family life remain entangled in a perpetual condition of role strain for
returning students.
Family Ideology
Family goals, behaviors, interaction patterns, hierarchies and stress responses are
among the many facets of household dynamics that are affected by the interplay of
perceptions, personal identities, social status, peer norms, religion and life experiences.
Core values of husbands and wives may drive family hierarchies and interaction patterns,
as well as attitudes toward individual growth and opportunities. Based on this research, it
appears that family ideologies are closely related to the family’s place in the larger social
hierarchy, as they perceive not only their status and prestige in society, but as this
translates into their personal sense of identity and the ability to self-actualize dreams or
goals.
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The value o f education. The respondents came from families wherein education
was held in high esteem. In some cases, education was categorized as a family tradition.
Most respondents had children who were either in attendance or were planning to attend
college, or who had already graduated from college. Because education was portrayed as
an intergenerational value, not only an individual goal, returning students were able to feel
validated as legitimate links between the past and the future of their family’s heritage.
These respondents were similar to McAdoo’s mobility group which maintained upward
economic mobility over three generations, as described earlier.
Respondents spoke proudly of their parents’ or grandparents’ accomplishments in
academia, sometimes noting their occupations (especially when relatives were teachers), as
an additional source of pride. They also pointed out that advanced degrees had not been
sufficient qualification to bridge the chasm between educational attainment and
occupational achievement created by racial discrimination. In either case, it is significant
to note that regardless of the response by white society, education was perceived to be
a reward in itself.
Despite the unreliability of societal rewards, returning to education was seen as the
fruition of a long term goal. There was a sense from most of the respondents that they
had always anticipated a college education, but had been unable to achieve it for various
reasons. Some respondents were required to care for their own younger siblings and/or
their parents as they grew up, and emphasis was placed on meeting the needs of siblings
and often providing them with educational opportunities, in lieu of seeking their own.
Thus, early employment became a main goal for these women when they were of
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traditional college age, and then marriage and children brought new financial obligations
as well as parenting responsibilities. Strong values about parental responsibility as well as
concurrent personal rewards of motherhood were seen as motivators to delay the pursuit
of their educational goals. Nevertheless, the belief that they would eventually find a way
to return to school was strongly expressed.
The decision to return. The importance of family obligations resulted in the
conscious decision to delay their own schooling until children were capable of being on
their own with minimal supervision (the youngest child in this sample was twelve years
old). Thus the timing of their return to school was considered a result of the intersection
of some specific realizations. Most of the returning students acknowledged that a) they
had contributed greatly as daughters and sisters; b) they had been committed mothers
while their children were young; and c) it was time they deserved to meet some of then-
own needs.
Even though these reentry women asserted that the time had come to pursue their
own goals, there was an overall hesitation to disrupt the family status quo, both in finances
and routine. The decision to return carried with it the knowledge that they would be
asking their families to sacrifice for them on some level, and for most of the women this
was a source of discomfort. Levels of support from husbands and children would remain
strong predictors of stress and well-being for the reentry students throughout their
educational careers.
The decision making process about reentry varied among the respondents. The
way the decision to return to college was made seems to be reflective of and embedded in
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the character of the family system, as it was perceived by the student to be flexible and
adaptive and the degree to which it could be supportive of her challenges to its current
homeostasis. It is interesting to note that “meanings” the family attached to the reentry
process contributed to the levels of support expressed by family members. Since most of
these women had been employed, even if not at the time of the interviews, their families
were accustomed to having wives and mothers with demanding schedules and limited
leisure. However, returning to school involved a refocusing of priorities and interests for
the student outside her home and family, in some cases challenging the existing family
ideology surrounding priorities, duties and expectations for wives and mothers.
Therefore, in some cases reentry was seen as somehow taking away from family members.
Therefore it was more than the homestasis of family schedules, chores or responsibilities
that was challenged by the reentry process, family members in some cases were required
to redefine individual niches and identities and create a new homeostasis.
Some women solely made the decision to return to school, with little or no
consultation with spouse or family members, and in these families there was eventually
more conflict as the college process began. Whether a sole decision was the cause of
conflict or whether a sole decision was a response to anticipated non-support remains in
question. Nevertheless, higher levels of conflict were experienced in those families where
the respondent made the sole decision to return.
The exception to this, where the sole decision seemed to have little detrimental
effect were the students who enrolled in part-time programs, taking a minimum of two
classes. These students may have anticipated the level of support they could expect from
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spouse and family and selected their classes based on this belief feeling this was all they
could individually manage, or they may have anticipated that if they attempted to register
for more classes they would meet with resistance from their families. Or, in some cases,
the student was attempting to measure her own capabilities as a student and made the
decision to keep her load as light as possible. In any event, the decision to enter on a part-
time basis does reflect a knowledge of self and/or husband and family, since several
contingencies were considered.
Some students negotiated their return to college with their spouses and children,
often choosing a program which would allow them to continue to work full-time as well
as go to school, e.g., night school or weekend college. For others, it meant contracting to
be either part-time employed or unemployed for a specific length of time. This group of
negotiators reflected the higher income portion of families, which may have allowed for
more flexibility in the support of individual goals. Income levels seem to contribute to
family ideologies that reflect limited opportunities for individual aspirations or have the
resources to encourage exploration of personal talents or interests.
Some wives were aware that their husband’s priority was sufficient income to
maintain a quality of life. For the most part, this value was esteemed by wives also.
Consequently, it may be that their decision to return to school, in spite of limitations it
may place on the family were reflections of the students’ personal needs to derive self
esteem outside of their societally ascribed roles of mother and wage-eamer. The dual
responsibility of parenting as well as earning a living has been viewed by society as varying
from an accomplishment worthy of praise and admiration, to merely the statement of what
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has been reality for African-American women, to some version of family pathology. This
dilemma is an example of the multilevel interaction between race, gender and social class.
Historically, Black women have adapted their occupational life-styles to meet the financial
needs of their families in a social context that constrained both their race and gender by
opportunity and personal definition. Reentry presents a locus to examine the meanings,
definition or status ascribed to her particular challenges, which according to this research
appear to increase the levels of self-esteem she experiences inside and outside the home.
Return to college has helped to validate positive perceptions of selfj as well as to magnify
personal growth, in a society which has if not destroyed such perceptions, then has
certainly neglected them.
Family goals. While the completion of a college degree may have been the long
term goal for the returning students, it may not have been for spouses and certainly not for
children. Thus the family faces the dilemma of prioritizing consensual goals and
confronting individual interests which may compete if not conflict with one another.
Some applications of family systems theory applied to the reentry process
(Hooper, 1979) would suggest that families will inherently change in a way that will
enhance the most growth and individuation for members, anticipating that the family
response and reconfiguration will mirror the individual’s commitment. This view
represents a value orientation that assumes that the inherent goal of the family system is
the growth and individuation of each member. This research challenges that notion and
suggests that the goal of reentry to college, as with any goal of a family member, is based
on the values in each respective family.
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As the family is situated in a social class hierarchy, there are internal hierarchies of
needs, interests and opportunities which must be ranked by each family. While there may
be family goals in relation to the larger social structure (e.g., income, occupation, status),
there are as well conflicting and competing goals within the family that require
prioritization. Traditionally, it has been part of the job description for wives and mothers
to subsume their personal goals into the successes of their spouses and their children’s
welfare, or to consciously sacrifice their personal goals for the good of the group. Thus,
in some cases the reentry student’s desire to pursue her personal goals represents a step
outside the traditional stereotype of wife and mother, and challenges the family ideology
and/or the traditional model of goal hierarchies for women inside and/or outside the home.
The individual growth model which characterizes some families is generally
identified with middle and upper-middle class families. And, further the encouragement of
women, especially Black women, to individually achieve their own goals is viewed as a
relatively new notion where women’s’ roles are concerned. Thus again, the exploration of
the reentry experience of African-American women is important in gaining an
understanding of the particular dynamics on the societal as well as the family level that
develop at the intersection of gender, race and social class.
Some respondents agreed that their decision to return to school had indeed
challenged their husbands’ understanding of existing family goals. They explained that
their husbands believed that by returning to school their wives had “changed the contract.”
In other words, husbands felt that early on in their marriage, as a couple they had
established priorities and goals, which generally involved achieving and maintaining a
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comfortable financial status, and the decision to return to school was not in the contract.
For some families this redirection involved the renegotiation and explication of new or re-
prioritized family goals and time tables, and for others it meant ongoing encounters with
unresolved conflict, reflecting a continuum of problem-solving styles across families.
“ Economy o f gratitude. ” The underpinnings of mutual support and individual
achievement are well expressed in Hochschild’s (1989) concept of the economy of
gratitude. Husbands and wives negotiate (often in unspoken means) family issues based
on an “interplay between his gratitude toward her and hers toward him” (p. 18). The
ability to give and/or receive gratitude from one another may be based on past
experiences, personal attitudes, values or beliefs in addition to the immediate
circumstances of the relationship. Whether commitments to family instead of self are seen
as personal sacrifices or merely role expectations will mediate feelings of gratitude for a
partner’s choices. Likewise, the ability to accept the family members’ willingness to be
supportive at their own cost may contribute to the levels of guilt felt by reentry students.
The larger context of the gender order must also be considered as contributor to
the “economy of gratitude,” because that may be the source of existing attitudes and
norms. For example, a general consensus of what constitutes household help or support
may be the key to measuring how much a husband is helping. If most husbands in the
social network vacuum weekly and the students’ husband never vacuums, he may not be
seen as deserving of gratitude. However, if he not only vacuumed but occasionally
washed the dishes also, he would be well-deserving of gratitude, in that particular
student’s home. Even if his contributions are minimal, if they go beyond the socially
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required amount, (or the amount anticipated by his wife), he will be deserving of gratitude.
The definition and standard expectation of household support may vary across social class
in so far as perceptions of appropriate spousal household involvement are attached to
occupational strata.
Length of time the student was in school was associated with levels of supportive
attitudes and behaviors at home. Most respondents noted that after the first semester of
school, if there had been a “honeymoon” period, it ended and they were more likely to
hear expressions about family inconveniences related to their student obligations as their
school career progressed. No ultimatums were issued, but students reported they knew
that over time, the patience and enthusiasm of their partners waned, especially during
situations where they were called upon to contribute unusual amounts of support.
However, some students who were in their last semester reported that their
husbands developed a sort of “second wind,” and had become more supportive as
graduation approached. Some families seemed to relax in their limits of negative
expression, and became more vocal about the sacrifices they had individually experienced.
This was perceived not a deprecating of their wives’ or mothers’ college experiences, but
more as a way of acknowledging their part in her success— investing in the economy of
gratitude— rather as a way of joining and being able to be a part of the success. In other
words, by expressing their own struggles incurred while she was in college, they were able
to legitimately claim a contribution to her achievement and experience her success as their
also— a good reason for the whole family to celebrate.
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In these families, the male perspective of the economy of gratitude was
conditioned by an interplay of values surrounding support of the family, finances, self
esteem and the availability of male jobs. Some students reported a suspicion that their
husbands may feel a lack of prestige or intimidation around their wives’ education and
what it may mean. While wives are reaching beyond the family and/or job market to find
self-fulfillment, they may appear from a husband’s perspective to be rejecting the
importance of being a family provider, a potential source of self-esteem for him, which
may have been out of his grasp. Husband’s academic attainment may also be a point of
contention, since in most of the cases of this group, the husbands were not at the same
educational level as their wives and their occupations were classified as blue-collar.
Triangling. The notion of the triangle in relationships is that it is prone to
instability and the formation of alliances. This can be stress producing for the person who
takes on the burden of balancing all the points of a triangle. To keep the triangle balanced,
the student has generally been seen as the individual most likely to take responsibility to
manage the contingencies that put strain on the family structure. Family variables such as
economics, personality types, division of labor, and quality of the marital relationship, to
name some of the most obvious, will all contribute to the unique structure and challenges
of each student’s experience. This condition can be observed throughout the sample, and
is a useful frame in which to view the varieties of dilemmas and emotions confronting the
reentry student and her family.
In some cases previously unresolved (or possibly even unacknowledged) relational
problems may have existed, causing resentments or insecurities. Triangling-in college
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reentry, not only offered to stressed spouses a scapegoat for the underlying tensions, it
offered the solution as well, e.g., “As soon as she graduates, things will be better.”
However, the triangling process generally only operates as a psychological means of
establishing stability or a power base to create a sense of stability. Therefore the college
reentry process often became the catch-all for several varieties of family stress and/or
dysfunction, and sometimes was used as the leverage to manipulate attitudes and/or
behaviors among family members on many levels. One of the results of triangling-in
reentry as a root of family difficulties was framing the student and her college experience
as an alliance against a husband, child or some other significant person or event, and
intensifying the guilt for the returning student.
Some triangles exist in all families, and are perceived to be justified in some cases.
The students reported that occupations were justifiable third entities in a marriage. The
triangle of husband, wife and job demands required ongoing juggling to maintain a balance
that was acceptable, and in the case of work, especially husband’s, wives stated they
would not construe a man and his work an alliance. Nevertheless they perceived their
husbands jobs as a priority. Some resentment was expressed also that husbands’ sports
interests were able to represent a more justifiable alliance than the students’ alliance with
their college careers.
Students did report that husbands did not feel included in their wives’ education.
Wives’ enlarged vocabularies, interest in current events and the development of new social
networks were seen as distancing agents. Some students reported conscious efforts were
made to include spouses (to balance the triangle), by inviting new college friends into the
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home, attempting to stimulate discussions about new ideas and recounting class or campus
experiences. Nevertheless, when one partner has new thoughts, new vocabularies, new
friends and new interests, the other partner is likely to perceive a challenge to the stability
of their existing relationship.
With this understanding, it was significant that respondents pointed out that their
choice to return to college, per se, was not the actual reason for any conflict, when
conflict did occur. There were often underlying strains in the marital relationship which
existed prior to the reentry experience. The return to college, then provided an additional
strain to ongoing, but often repressed interpersonal or personal difficulties.
Communication The couples in this sample demonstrated a well-known technique
used to mask or soften criticism. Husbands were reported to use subtle or indirect
approaches to the subject of their wives’ changes in priorities. Instead of directly stating
he was unhappy, about the changes brought on by his wife’s reentry, a husband might say,
“We can’t afford to eat out as much as before,” or, “We don’t have the time or money to
get away on a trip this year.”
Another example of indirectly expressed feelings was the subject of finances which
was an area which was characteristically problematic for the mid-range economic group,
and evoked strong responses from partners. In conversations, the burden of guilt for
financial strain or family well-being was indirectly focused on the students’ choice to be in
school. There was a sense that there was more meaning than the mere message itself. The
respondents reported they knew the “meta” message was that their choice was making it
difficult for everyone in the family. An argument would follow such comments, if the
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respondent chose to pursue it. Husbands seemed to know that a directly confrontive
challenge to their wives’ educations would draw certain retaliation and discord, whereas,
an indirect suggestion of personal dissatisfaction would initially be treated and/or resolved
in a more informal way. Wives would use humor, tenderness or expressions of gratitude
for their families’ indulgence as a way to mediate tension, as well as to difluse a potential
argument. Generally, neither partner was willing to either issue or anticipate the issue of
an ultimatum that may force a difficult or undesirable decision.
This type of exchange is not unusual between couples, and is seen as a common
communication style in couples who are familiar with their partners “hot buttons,” and
who know the limits to which they can verbalize their concerns or disapproval. Other
partners view this as a way of “letting off steam,” to enable one another to express feelings
without expecting change— merely a means of receiving validation for the difficult role he
or she had been assigned. In a therapeutic setting, the couple would be asked to define the
meaning behind their individual and/or couple use of this particular communication
strategy, and to identify whether it had a productive or nonproductive use in their
relationship. The freedom to express individual feelings is usually associated with a
healthy relationship and a high degree of commitment to that relationship.
Family Structure
For the most part, the family structures of the women in this sample could in part
be characterized by income. Those families in the higher income ranges generally
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contained two parents (although both parents were not employed in all cases), and in the
lower income ranges were families with only one parent in the home.
Family authority hierarchies reflect generational boundaries between parents and
children, with mother and father perceived as the authority figures in the home. Variations
in parenting styles had to do with personalities or other individual criteria and not with
differences in structural patterns. The particular responsibilities of each family member or
the perceived relationships between roles appear to be adaptive to the social stratification
system in which the family system is embedded. As a family experiences upward or
downward mobility, identifies itself with a particular reference group, experiences
discriminatory societal attitudes, or maintains its place in the stratification system, the
family structure adapts to accommodate micro needs in the macro system.
Who has the power in the family may be demonstrated literally or figuratively. In
this sample, in some cases women consciously made decisions which would empower their
husbands as father and head of the household. This was done on both the parental and
financial provider levels. While this is a common pattern in many households and is seen
across races, it may be informative to make the point here, noting the history of
occupational discrimination experienced by African-American men. The particular
dilemma of Black men wherein their ability to financially support their families has been
restricted, as well as their difficulty in acquiring the other resources and rewards of
society, cannot be minimized. It is therefore likely that husbands may have been more
sensitive to the aspirations of their wives, and wives were more sensitive to the
psychological implications that their own reentry goals had for their husbands. Thus
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conscious attention may have been paid to reinforcing the traditional husband/father place
in the family hierarchy.
For the most part, it appears that husbands and wives acted as a team in
contributing financially to the family. Husbands, nevertheless verbally took responsibility
for carrying the financial burden of the family and wives generally acknowledged them as
being in charge of financial planning, if not actually in charge of providing the family
income.
It may have been this understanding that led to some ongoing resistance to return
to college when the student made the decision without consultation. However, at the
same time, lack of consultation indicates an indepth knowledge of the structure and
operation of the couple hierarchy. Wives stated that the decision was made without
consultation in order to preclude an argument with their spouses or to preclude spouses’
directives that they must not change their life styles by returning to school at this time. It
was assumed by the respondents that once the decision was in place, husbands would
adapt to it. This demonstrates a knowledge of both husbands’ attitudes toward their
wives’ educational careers, as well as an understanding of personalities and their unique
dyadic power structure. The choice to avoid involving husbands in the decision reflects a
belief that she would feel obligated to either acquiesce to her husband’s wishes or be
prepared for a confrontation from which she may have to back down. She also was aware
of her own power position, sensing that he would adapt to her decision once it was made.
Therefore, to be expedient, the only option, if she was determined to return to school, was
to keep him uniformed until after the fact. This was not seen as the typical pattern for
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family decisions, but was viewed as a way of circumventing structural obstacles. Thus, it
appears that the couple power hierarchy was not a static condition, but fluctuated between
both husband and wife relative to the situation. Thus, decisions around financial issues
provide a context to view the dynamic of couple negotiations.
There is a consensus among family researchers that money-related issues cause
more stress and conflict than any others for all families. Likewise, in this sample finances
and household chores were the topics of most disagreements. Some fathers suggested
that it was more appropriate for the children to assume more of mothers’ household
chores rather than assuming them himself challenging mothers’ perception of the
generational boundaries between the duties of parents and children. Even if children or
husbands were assigned additional chores, they were seen only as “helping out Mom.”
Traditional family roles did not change, i.e., father did not become co-housekeeper, nor
did children become co-parents. While from time to time family members would assume
some tasks generally associated with another, the family structure with regard to role
expectations remained in the pre-college form.
Both finances and chores, as sources of conflict, involve areas of home life which
are constrained by income. In some cases, adequate financial resources were available to
mediate crises encountered during reentry, as well as easing the conflict around chore
distribution by obtaining outside household help. While the need for two incomes appears
to have an equilizing effect on the husband-wife hierarchy, it also puts restraints on the
autonomy either member of the couple may experience in their personal lives.
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Income and interpersonal needs accounted for differences in family structure, with
the reentry student developing her own customized strategy to interface her personal goals
with family relationships, resources and financial obligations. It has been this interface that
has been the subject of the current research. It has been the purpose of this study to
explore returning students’ experiences and personal perceptions of their educational
careers in relation to their family life and the social mileau.
Gender. Race and Social Class
An ongoing debate exists concerning the primacy of race or social class as a
variable contributing to the development of family structure, life styles and values (Wilson,
1987, 1980). While the debate itself is interesting, the benefits of an “either or”
framework are limited. Alternatively, Patricia Hill Collins describes a matrix wherein
class, gender and race intersect. This research affirms Collins’ approach, suggesting that
the study of the intersections of race, class and gender may be more useful than the
process of identifying differences. To reduce personal experiences and their related
perceptions to economics would discount a broad spectrum of social conditions and
attitudes and their attendant consequences in the lives of generations of African-
Americans. Instead, we need to acknowledge the multifaceted interactions between race,
class and gender. Middle and upper-middle class Black reentry women are both similar
and different from white middle-class reentry women, as well as being different from Black
working-class or poor women, and must be seen as residing in a distinct social niche.
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Nevertheless, in attempting to tease out motivations for attitudes about structural
inequalities experienced by African-Americans in general, and African-American women in
particular, it may be helpful to examine social class as a resource beyond the most obvious
benefits of income and creature comforts. By achieving legitimacy, if not prestige, in
society based on financial success and the establishment of middle to upper-middle class
lifestyle, African-Americans may be able to use social class to put pressure on the barriers
they have experienced due to stereotypes and prejudice. The feet that the respondents in
this sample had indeed achieved financial success, infers that as individuals they had either
encountered relatively limited degrees of discrimination or upon encountering it, were able
to overcome the barriers it presented. Assuming this, this group may generally represent
an attitude of empowerment which has allowed and reinforced the belief that individually
they are capable of successfully negotiating in a restrictive system. Thus it would be
reasonable to assume that structural inequality is not as threatening to them. With
sufficient occupational and social skills they have been able to achieve a comfortable place
in the economic class structure. Therefore, this research has suggested that as social
class is lower, race becomes more salient and as social class is higher, race becomes
less salient. If this is so, can social class then partially mute racial discrimination?
It has been observed that on the societal level, social class has mediating effects on
gender discrimination. Operating in the context of middle-class, are African-American
women able to access more prestige within group than white middle-class women can
within their group? Are there within class commonalties for African-American and white
women? The reentry experience provides a context for the examination of the differences
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and parallels between reentry women of the same social class, hoping to illuminate the
obvious dynamics as well as the subtleties when gender, race and social class converge.
As the reentry students took up the challenge of pursuing personal goals outside
of their traditional ascribed statuses of wives and mothers, they also were required to meet
the challenge of interacting (some for the first time) with the giant educational
bureaucracy. The larger four-year universities were the most challenging environments for
the returning students. Respondents attending these schools experienced some degree of
anomie and isolation, especially in the beginning of their college careers. They entered
school unaware of information programs or offices that might have provided assistance in
their early days on campus. Their first semester of school therefore was the most
challenging, based on their difficulty in ‘learning the ropes.” In addressing their feelings of
isolation, some respondents indicated they had consciously made the acquaintance of other
returning women they observed on campus. The reentry students would meet for lunch,
study time or to enjoy a break between classes, offering social, academic and sometimes
emotional support to each other. Over time, the newly developing social network would
plan class schedules that would enable them to occasionally have classes together. The
initial criteria required to make an acquaintance was not based on ethnicity, but age. If a
woman appeared to be in the same age range as the respondent, she was seen as a
potential peer and was drawn into a conversation. The fact that ethnicity did not play a
part in the decision to pursue an acquaintance (or at least an engaging conversation) “ just
shows how desperate I was for companionship,” laughingly responded one student.
Another support for the reentry women on the large campuses were centers designed for
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reentry women and/or African-American students. The respondents who were referred to
these types of centers seemed to become assimilated as students more quickly.
The reentry women experienced increases in self-confidence and self-esteem as
they conquored fears of not being smart enough to go to college, their fear of failing afier
all the family sacrifices that had been made, and their fear that they may not be able to
incorporate such a large outside commitment into their lives. They attributed personal
growth not only to the knowledge that their classes were providing, but also to the
increased ability to be directive in their own lives. Making the decision to return to school
was seen as a step toward independence and self-actualization. While the goal to return to
school had been a long-term desire, the very real motions of registration, applying for
financial aid if necessary, buying books, and ultimately attending class were seen as acts of
courage and determination. For several students, the financial aid process and entering the
bureaucratic maze of a large university was unlike anything they had experienced
previously.
They believed that returning to school had equipped them to interface with the
existing power structure with new confidence and hope. Education was seen as one way
to possibly begin mediating the condition of being an African-American woman in a white
society, and to acquire a voice as a woman and as a woman of color. The ability to
confront professors concerning course content and its relativity to multicultural students
was seen as a step in the direction of positive change. It was also viewed as an example of
increased personal self-confidence since it took some degree of tenacity to challenge the
existing curriculum. The predominantly white male educational system has been accused
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of being biased against women, so as African-American women pick up the challenge of
gender discrimination as well as racial discrimination, it must be applauded for courage, as
well as progress in reinforcing their legitimacy in the easting social structure.
There were differing experiences of bias or discrimination. Some students noted
that even though they recognized that as Black women they were a distinct minority in the
classroom, they did not experience discrimination. Other students, however, felt they
were identified almost immediately as the potential under-achievers of the class, based
solely on their ethnicity and the stereotypes held by the professor. Further, some students
indicated they had been warned about the existence of ethnic bias in certain departments of
some universities. Overall, however, examples of discrimination were described as being
experienced in relationship to particular individuals (sometimes professors) and not
generally ascribed to the entire system. This is reminiscent of the interview experiences
with the women in the lower income ranges, wherein the topic of structural inequality
became a major theme. Compared to the higher income respondents who referred to
racism as it occurred on an individual level or a situational basis, the lower income women
identified their difficulties as a generalized experience all African-Americans shared. The
differences between these groups’ perceptions seems to indicate that social class has an
effect on the sense of one’s personal viability in society. Middle-class experiences may
foster more faith (or at least less fear) in the social structure as a vehicle for mobility.
Again, the research suggests that the reentry experience may be more similar for white and
Black middle-class women than it is for Black middle-class and poor reentry women.
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While in this sample higher social class seems to have been a variable associated
with perceptions of individual rather than structural discrimination, nevertheless it should
be noted that this may not be a generalizable conclusion. Authors such as journalist Ellis
Cose, in his book The Rage of a Privileged Class (1993), addressed this very question.
While noting that white Americans are not “intent on persecuting black people, or that
blacks are utterly helpless and fault-free victims of society,” he contends that “America is
filled with attitudes, assumptions, stereotypes, and behaviors that make it virtually
impossible for blacks to believe that the nation is serious about its promise of equality-
even (perhaps especially) for those who have been blessed with material success” (p. 5).
The suggestion that middle-class white and Black reentry women may have similar
experiences is not to trivialize the historical disenfranchizement experienced by African-
Americans. However, the intersection and parallels of reentry women of the same class,
although of differing races, is important to acknowledge. Social class has emerged as a
salient factor in the reentry process of these women. Over the course of the research
differences between subsamples based on family incomes and type of educational program
(part-time, full-time, day/evening, weekend) have been identified, possibly suggesting that
social class, in some cases may be more salient in explaining differences and similarities
than race. For example, only three students of the fifteen with family incomes above
$50,000 were enrolled in part-time programs. Obviously, finances influenced the ability of
the respondents to commit more time or resources to the accomplishment of their
educational goals.
159
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Based on the increasing economic differentiation occurring within the African-
American population, these Black middle-class respondents may indeed have more in
common with other middle-class society members than with lower SES African-American.
In other words, though not the sole determinant, social class may be the most salient
factor in the life styles and life chances in the experiences of these women. If this is so,
then the complicated dilemma of loyalty and/or disloyalty with regard to gender and race
raised by Black feminist theorists remain to be addressed.
Okhamafe (1989) states that “women cannot be singularly framed, that anatomical
similarity does not necessarily mean experiential commonality3 7 (p. 33) This implies that
female biology may be the major connection between women. Further separating black
and white women, is the notion, stated well by Singleton (1989), “White women’s loyalty
to patriarchal civilization requires that women be divided and conquered, not only
physically, but symbolically as well” (p. 12). She further asserts, and refers to Adrienne
Rich’s (1979) statements that for white women to resolve their participation (even if
passive) in racism, they must become disloyal to civilization and make a commitment to
women. Does the adherence to and inculcation of middle-class values put African-
American women at odds with one another? Are white women and African-American
women necessarily incapable of finding some medium of commonality? One can assume
the stance of such theorists as Sheila Radford-Hill (1968, p. 162), who stated:
The history of the feminist movement proves the fact that
the oppressions of white and black women are equally
compelling but mutually exclusive...[Bonding] across lines
of race, and to a lesser extent across class lines, is not
possible at the present time.
160
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Or, from another point of view, as stated earlier by Audre Lorde (1984),
“Feminist theory will not be an effective force for social change until difference can be
seen as a powerful connection between women” (p. 112). Which brings one back to the
potential benefit of this research; that examining the reentry experience from the
perspective of middle-class African-American women may help to provide a greater
understanding of ethnic differences and parallels, and how they are associated with class
inequalities.
This research has indicated that these reentry students met with a wide range of
obstacles and challenges from the structural to the familial level. Their responses to the
problems which had to be addressed also varied from individual to individual. To
disregard the notion of discrimination, both on a structural and/or individual level would
discount the collective experiences of the respondents. Instead, acknowledging the
difficulties of being minority women with financial and emotional obligations to children,
husbands and extended kin, they may be characterized as role models for women of all
ethnicities as their strategies for achievement, not only their coping mechanisms, are
observed, noted and analyzed. Indeed, their stories may be characterized as narrations of
heroism. As society moves more and more in the direction of dual-earner families,
African-American women have emerged as models of competence who have historically
successfully maintained their families while also working outside the home. Can we not all
learn from their example?
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Implications for Further Research
This study raised several questions which should be addressed by future research.
The process of family interactions which was observed as a consequence of this study,
suggest that more studies about family dynamics are necessary. Research on the concept
of “his and her” marital experiences is needed. This study indicates the possibility of the
existence and competition of different individual goals for husbands and wives.
The experience of being a black husband and father is changing as is the experience
of black women as mothers and wives. The interface of education and mobility for both
black men and women will have repercussions in family structure. How does the fact that
African-American men have had limited access to education and/or the occupational
rewards attached to education impact the marital relationship? How does the negative
stereotype of the Black male impact the husband/wife relationship?
Alternative types of college programs have been seen to be of benefit to returning
women. Further research is essential to identify ways that college can be made available
to women without requiring that they have to leave the work force. More outcome
studies examining the success rates for program types such as night programs and
weekend college are crucial. This is especially indicative of further examination since
students in this study who were in weekend college programs reported the lowest rates of
conflict and role strain.
This study raised questions regarding the difficulty women have when attempting
to finance their part-time educations. More studies are necessary to examine the
162
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relationship between financial aid and the ability of women returning to school on either
part-time or full-time status.
Additionally, research is needed on the benefits of campus programs as aids to the
successful assimilation of reentry students. While the women reported that such outreach
programs and organizations such as an African-American student center or a reentry
women’s program were very helpful, they also reported that they were unaware of campus
support systems or facilities that would have made them aware of financial aid,
scholarships, child care or other pertinent organizations. They learned of these through
word of mouth, not by information included in new student packets of documents. More
information is needed to be able to better utilize campus, community, or government
facilities.
It may be valuable to utilize theories from related fields to inform and/or explore
the relationships between gender, class and race. To paraphrase some of Bowen’s theory
of family therapy (1978), one could ask what can we learn about society from our study of
the family? This is not to suggest that society can merely be reduced to family as its most
basic component, but that society as well as families are subject to the same emotional
forces.
Bowen developed a concept that he called “societal regression” in which he
viewed society as a family: A family writ large with its own set of anxieties, triangles,
multi-generaltional struggles, etc. He would see our current situation with drug addiction,
high divorce rates, crime and other social problems as the results of levels of anxiety that
might put any family in crisis. He suggested that the attempt to identify ourselves as
163
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separate or distinct from others, exclusive of the family/social system, was not only non
productive, but would lead to dysfunction.
If this notion can be applied in any way to the resolution of ethnic differences,
wherein women especially can see themselves as parts of a societal family system, laden
with the multi-generational transmission of functional as well as dysfunctional values,
attitudes, behaviors and norms, there is a possibility of acknowledging each other’s needs
and importance in the system, without attempting to form an assimilated form of generic
woman. Bowen would further suggest that identifying and defining issues as only black
women’s or white women’s issues creates polarization and dichotomies which may work
well scientifically, but do not offer a framework to interact on a systemic level that would
be mutually beneficial. In fact, this type of conceptualization would lead only to rigidity
and lack of creativity. Viewing families and/or society as continuous, reflexive, interactive
systems can create links between individuals and generations.
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APPENDIX
Table 1 166
Table 2 166
Consent to be Interviewed 167
Interview Questions 168
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Table 1
Marital Status by Type of Educational Program
Type of Program Single Married Total
Part-time 2 6 8 32
Full-time 2 8 10 40
Weekend 1 6 7 28
Total 5 20 25
Percentage 20 80 100
Table 2
Family Income by Type of Educational Program
Family
Income Part-time Full-time Weekend Total Percentage
$30,000
and lower
5 4 5 10 40
50,G O O -
74,999
3 3 3 9 36
75,000
and above
0 3 3 6 24
Total 8 10 7 25
Percentage 32 40 28 100
166
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The College Reentry Experience
Consent to be Interviewed
Date
Than you for agreeing to participate in the research study conducted by Sandra
Harte Bunce for the purpose of her doctoral dissertation in the Department of Sociology,
University of Southern California.
By engaging in an interview, the researcher and respondent agree to abide by the
following terms:
1. The respondent is to remain anonymous. No identifying names, places or personal
descriptions will be used in writing or any other manner that may lead to the recognition
of the respondent by anyone who comes into contact with the research.
2. The respondent may request the return of all audio tapes after transcription has taken
place, and may further request an opportunity to examine the transcript of the interview at
any time.
3. The respondent may request at any time during the research process that the content of
her interview be withdrawn from the research data.
4. Upon request, the researcher will make available to the respondent a copy of the
completed report of the research project.
5. The researcher will make herself available to the respondent via telephone or mail to
answer any questions which may arise as a result of participation in this research project.
6. The respondent understands that he/she is in no way obligated to participate in this
study and may withdraw from the project at any time during the interview.
Sandra Harte Bunce
860 Via de la Paz, Suite f-6
Pacific Palisades, CA
90272
(310) 459-5062
167
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The Interview Questions
1. Demographics: Age, marital status, number of children, family income, name of
college, year in program, occupation, husband’s occupation.
2. Why did you decide to return to college?
3. What was the family’s initial reaction to mom’s desire to return to school? Has it
changed?
4. What sort of things do family members do or say that let you know how they feel
supported? Unsupported?
5. Has the family division of labor changed since mom returned to school? How was the
present division of labor negotiated?
6. How did you decide to return to school? Was the family involved? Did you make any
bargains or deals to get family support?
7. Is homework a priority? When do you do it?
8. How did you decide on classes and times?
9. Do you argue more now than before you went back to school? Do you ever argue
about school? What do you argue about?
10. Who is the most helpful/supportive person in the household? Why? What do they
do/say?
11. What is a typical day for you?
12. What has changed since you’ve returned to school? What hasn’t?
13. What is the hardest part of being back in school?
14. Are there other family members who have college educations? Are there other
reentry women? What’s it like for you in your family of origin to be a reeentry
student?
15. What could make you quit school?
16. What are your goals after school? More school? Change in job or career?
17. If you were sick, would a family member go to class for you?
168
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18. Is it okay to complain about school or life problems to your family?
19. What are your kids’ opinions? Is their school behavior any different in your eyes
since you’ve been back in college?
20. Do you spend more or less time together as a family? What do you do together?
What gets “sacrificed” for family events? Have your family obligations changed?
21. How has going back to school made you feel about yourself as a person, as a mother,
as a wife?
22. Do you receive support (emotional, physical or financial) from family members?
From anyone outside your immediate household, e.g. religious community,
relatives, quasi-kin?
23. How did you decide to do things differently to make room for school? Who decided
the priorities? Were changes conscious decisions or did they just emerge? Did
you get input from others?
24. Who’s in charge of the family? Will that be different after school is over? Is it
different now from what it used to be?
25. How have school finances been handled?
169
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Asset Metadata

Creator Bunce, Sandra Harte (author)

Core Title "It's always something": African-American women's college reentry experience

Degree Doctor of Philosophy

Degree Program Sociology

Publisher University of Southern California (original), University of Southern California. Libraries (digital)

Tag Education, higher,OAI-PMH Harvest,sociology, ethnic and racial studies,sociology, individual and family studies,women's studies

Language English

Contributor Digitized by ProQuest (provenance)

Advisor Messner, Michael (committee chair), Chung, Ruth H. (committee member), Hondagneu-Sotelo, Pierrette (committee member)

Permanent Link (DOI) https://doi.org/10.25549/usctheses-c17-540691

Unique identifier UC11350212

Identifier 9720196.pdf (filename),usctheses-c17-540691 (legacy record id)

Legacy Identifier 9720196.pdf

Dmrecord 540691

Document Type Dissertation

Rights Bunce, Sandra Harte

Type texts

Source University of Southern California (contributing entity), University of Southern California Dissertations and Theses (collection)

Access Conditions The author retains rights to his/her dissertation, thesis or other graduate work according to U.S. copyright law. Electronic access is being provided by the USC Libraries in agreement with the au...

Repository Name University of Southern California Digital Library

Repository Location USC Digital Library, University of Southern California, University Park Campus, Los Angeles, California 90089, USA